In this captivating episode, we sit down with Ken Shamrock, the living legend of UFC and WWE fame, who shares his journey from the wrestling ring to the world of bare-knuckle fighting. Delve into Ken’s viewpoint on maintaining authenticity in sports and the importance of staying true to one’s values in a rapidly changing world. Additionally, enjoy episodes filled with humor as we recount the tale of a Florida man’s overly adventurous spirit and a lighthearted look at everyday fumbles, including a coyote that was mistaken for a pet! Tune in for a mix of laughter, reflection, and inspiration.
SPEAKER 05 :
Liberty Nation with Mark Angelides. Can Donald Trump hit the ground running? Will Democrats find a raison d’etre? And is the Never Trump movement a thing of the past? Find out on this week’s Liberty Nation Radio. Author, columnist, managing editor of LibertyNation.com. Podcast host and conservative policy advocate. We dismiss history at our peril. Liberty Nation with Mark Angelides.
SPEAKER 02 :
Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.
SPEAKER 06 :
It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
SPEAKER 01 :
First up, a Florida truck driver. You know how they got snow, right? Southern Florida, well, not southern, like the panhandle. Well, this one truck driver was very excited about the snow, and so he thought, you know, I get it. He’s like, why not do donuts? But you’re in a truck, and he crashed in Walton County, Florida. And this has now made it to where Florida Department of Transportation come out and they have to go, guys, we know you’re very excited about the snow. Let’s not be taking our big rigs out there and be doing donuts out in it, all right? It probably melted already anyway. But he’s okay. Deputies responded to the crash. It got reported in. But they’re telling people, stay off the roads. He, like, went off an embankment. it like a pretty big embankment i mean they’re gonna have to tow that truck out i don’t know how they’re gonna get that truck out it’s like on its side off a concrete drop off it’s man so be careful out there you know a uh let’s see this oh no no no a florida man 73 years old why is this always somebody who’s like it’s an old progressive right this is when you say that you don’t like old people and that they’re not innocent are you talking about the progressive ones Cain, if you could see how he’s trying to turn himself off. Well, there’s four different things. He’s like chaotic. He’s like, I am not going to be impugned in such a way.
SPEAKER 06 :
We need to clear this up. Not all old people are innocent. Stop what you’re doing. Not all old people are innocent. And this is an example of one of those not all old people.
SPEAKER 01 :
Well, he’s 73 years old. He was naked. Sorry, I’m doing the Ozark pronunciation. N-E-K-K-I-D. Naked. That sounds dumb to say. Doesn’t it? Naked. That sounds so weird. He said that he was literally walking around the park in his neighborhood. Buck naked. And when police arrived, because obviously everyone and their brother called the police, he said, he said, well, there are new parks here. There’s new beaches here because there are new beaches in Florida. And they’re like, sir, you’re not at the beach. You’re literally in the middle of like a residential community walking around the park. Like, why are you why are you like this? He was taken into custody because he was doing the exposing of his sexual organs. So, yeah. And let’s see. I got one more for you. A Florida man ate a diet of butter, cheese, beef, mostly butter and cheese, and his cholesterol went through the roof. Yeah, because, you know, you can’t eat high fat butter and high fat cheese and eat all the high fatty fat stuff. You got to you got to be careful with this stuff. This was a story. It was Ars Technica that I was reading. He high cholesterol is considered 240. His over a thousand. How are you living? How are you living? That’s insane. I don’t know, man. It is a big week, and we’re not just talking about Inauguration Day. Kel-Tec has officially unveiled their brand-new pistol, the PR-57, and it’s causing a huge buzz. Over a million views on the release video already, and you need to see why. Visit Kel-TecWeapons.com slash Dana today. Right now, check it out. It’s the Kel-Tec PR-57. It’s a revolutionary compact concealed carry pistol chambered in 5.7. It’s ultra-lightweight, 20-round capacity. And here’s what’s the kicker. It’s a unique top-loading design. It’s slim, simple, and practical. You’re not going to have a magazine. In fact, the PR57 loads directly into the grip. It’s a rotary barrel design, and it reduces weight by 40% compared to the other 57 millimeters on the market. And it’s not just innovative. It’s built for real-world performance with ease of use in mind. So for a limited time, you can win your own Kel-Tec. Just head over to keltecweapons.com slash Dana. Enter their SHOT Show Week giveaway right before midnight Thursday. That’s a deadline. The winner, I’ll announce it live on air. The winner, Friday, January 24th. So don’t miss your chance to own the future of concealed carry. Visit keltecweapons.com slash Dana. Kel-Tec. Innovation performance made in the USA.
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SPEAKER 01 :
Welcome back to the program. Dana Lash here with you broadcasting from NSSF Shot Show. We come here every year. You all know the drill. It’s like the one time I’m out of my hobbit hole. And this is a great event to come to. I haven’t even seen hardly anything. I was just talking to my friend Ken Shamrock, the most dangerous man on God’s green earth. That’s not his official title. It’s the world’s most dangerous man. I think he’s like the universe’s most dangerous man. I have watched a number of his matches. And he looks like so, you know, he’s so pleasant and so nice. Right now. I mean, totally not, you know, just so nice. And Ken joins us live here in Vegas at SHOT Show. And by the way, you guys are, people can watch the show, Channel 347, DirecTV. We’re at X, Facebook, all over and terrestrially. So welcome. It’s been a while. The last time I spoke with you, it was in Dallas and it was like seven or eight years ago. So it’s been a while. We’ve grown up. We’re big kids now. is that is that is that real yeah are we grown up i don’t know like i maybe not i don’t know i like i question some sometimes i see the way stuff goes down i don’t want to grow up i know man i’m telling you so you’re at shot you got in probably i think the same day that that we did and you come to shot show a lot i mean you like this stuff here i mean you you you walk around you you kind of take it all in you stay busy what do you have you gotten to see anything yet this year
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, you know, usually when I come to these, I just, I mean, I don’t have a specific thing I’m doing here other than when I’m being coming in and doing something like I am this time. But yeah, I’ve been able to browse around and look and see. And it’s just, for me, man, it’s just such a breath of fresh air to come here and see this thing grow. Yeah. See that we’re… We’re getting our rights, you know, that we’ve had for I don’t know how long, ever since man has been man, to be able to bear arms and the amendment. And it’s moving forward. And there for a minute, we didn’t know if that was going to happen. So it’s awesome to be here, see this thing flourishing and growing and seeing all the different designs and things that are coming out with the weapons and things like that. It’s just an awesome show.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, the weapons tech is I love the progression in technology. And I love this industry because people don’t realize that. I mean, you do, but a lot of people don’t. That these are all mom and pop businesses that got really successful in various degrees. And I don’t know any other industry really that is like that.
SPEAKER 03 :
It seems like, you know, there’s the freedom to be able to kind of explore and take up different designs and start businesses, you know, and this is one of them where they can just literally, you know, say, hey, I’m going to do this and jump in and do it. But again, I want to go back to that part where it’s like, you know, six months ago, we weren’t even sure we were going to be able to bear arms. So it’s a refreshing thing to be here and see this thing growing.
SPEAKER 01 :
You seem like very satisfied and rested after November, Tuesday in November, a very certain Tuesday. You seem very happy.
SPEAKER 03 :
I think a lot of us were that way, whereas like, you know, it’s a major deal, you know, and for that to be something that we had to fear is just beyond me. I can’t even think of how that would even be possible.
SPEAKER 01 :
It’s, I mean, I think we’re going to look back on the previous term, the previous administration and wonder what in the hell was going on? What was happening? for those four years. I mean, we’re paying taxes out of the nose. For what? We’re getting involved in every international dispute. They can’t articulate any kind of American interest for it. I mean, every single thing that… Every day it was something new. It was exhausting, tiring. It affected Americans’ moods. Now everyone… Like, you are so calm and happy right now. You’re actually… You’re almost giddy.
SPEAKER 03 :
That’s probably the closest to giddy you’d be. Yeah, again, like I said, it is a good feeling to wake up and know that we’re on the right track. We have a great president that’s in there now. And it just feels like the sky’s the limit. And that’s really what I feel as opposed to six months ago where I felt like we were confused.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, that’s a good way to put it. We’re talking with our friend Ken Shamrock, the world’s most dangerous man. I mean, he is a UFC legend. He’s a WWE legend. We’re going to talk about some of that stuff. There was an interview that you gave, you know, speaking of, you know, where we were six months ago and how weird through these weird policies society has been made. You gave an interview and I thought it was so poignant. You were talking about your relationship with WWE and you and somehow like I guess China got brought up. And you were saying that you didn’t want to you didn’t feel it was appropriate to get into the ring with her. And you were like, I got kids and they see this. And I thought that was incredibly that was a really just as a parent. I’m like, I get that. I get exactly what he’s saying right here. That that makes sense. And also, you’re an athlete and you understand just, you know, basic anatomy and physiology. Yeah. You’re like educated, unlike some of these people in HHS, apparently.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, you know, and this was back when my kids were still in, you know, kindergarten and grade school. Yeah. And, you know, I was doing, obviously doing well in the WWF, just finished a career, you know, with UFC and over in Pancras becoming a world champion and, you know, the actual fighting. Then I went into pro wrestling and, you know, WWF and had some fun there. And it just, there was a time where I was asked to, get in and actually have a match with China. And now this is pro wrestling, right? So most people in their minds are thinking, Ken, come on, brother. It’s not real. It’s pro wrestling. You guys are going to go out there and do a script and tell a story. And, you know, it’s just what it is. And I looked at him and I said… I have kids at home and there’s all these other kids out there that are watching me. They don’t know this is entertainment. And so for me to walk in there, even though China is in tremendous shape and I give her all the respect in the world and I loved her and I felt bad on how things turned out with her. I was not going to get in there and beat up a woman. Even though it may have been entertainment, the rest of the world or half the world that are young kids do not know that. And so I took a stand and I basically said, no, I’m not going to do that. Good for you.
SPEAKER 01 :
That’s amazing because it’s just, I think a lot of people, because it’s a huge professional thing. I mean, it’s not like, you know, you make a move in that industry and everybody knows about it. So this, you know, it became some news and it made some headlines. But I also think it set a precedent because you look at what’s happening with sports. And one of the reasons why I think, you know, November went the way that it did. People are so tired of having to defend just like basic science and say, why can’t boys play on boys teams, girls play on girls teams? I’m just glad I don’t have a daughter. I have boys. I’m a boy mom. I can’t imagine raising a daughter in that kind of environment and having to defend her before she even gets on the court or on the field.
SPEAKER 03 :
And then it’s difficult for them to defend themselves because then they’re looked at as being weak. You know, like, well, what are you afraid of? It’s like, yeah.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, kind of am, a little bit, yeah.
SPEAKER 03 :
There’s a big difference between a man and a woman when it comes to the physical nature of sports.
SPEAKER 01 :
Do you think that point has been made with the last election? Do you think that maybe the people that have been pushing this in society, that they’ve gotten the message? Is this going to stop? I mean, how long are we going to have to deal with this?
SPEAKER 03 :
I don’t know if it’ll ever go away, but I don’t think we’re ever going to have to deal with it in the schools, or at least for the next four years, maybe even longer than that, if things go the way I hope they go. I don’t think we’ll have to deal with that in our schools. I do believe that we’re always going to have to deal with it in society, period.
SPEAKER 01 :
I can’t imagine being a principal and having to deal with this with the student body, and then forcing it on the student body, and then the parents… come in and one of the parents is Ken Shamrock. And Ken Shamrock comes in the principal’s office. That has like the opposite intended threat. Usually you’re scared if you go in the principal’s office. Ken Shamrock coming in the principal’s office is a whole different issue. But how does Dad Ken deal with that? I have four girls, three boys. God love you. And
SPEAKER 03 :
I just know this, that I haven’t had any serious issues. I wouldn’t imagine you would. Yeah, but I also think it’s the way that I’ve raised my kids and choices and decisions that they make. And that I’ve always instilled in them that no matter whether it’s a principal, a teacher, an adult, anywhere that you’re at, your voice matters. And that if you run into something, whether it’s… you know, something that you have in faith or, you know, obviously, you know, gender and things of that nature, you have a right to speak up and to stand your ground on what you believe in. And so most of the time I’ve never had to really intervene. They’re very strong-minded women, thanks to my wife, because she’s definitely strong-minded.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, I would have to imagine you’d have to have the female equivalent of Kim Shamrock.
SPEAKER 03 :
She’s a strong woman, and it’s definitely been instilled in our daughters. So I haven’t really had a head-butted situation where I had to really get in and take care of it. We’ve had situations, but they’ve dealt with it.
SPEAKER 01 :
That’s awesome. That’s awesome. Talking with our friend Ken Shamrock, who’s got a lot of stuff coming up, which I’m going to ask you about, because you’ve got the WWE Legends. You’ve got a lot of stuff coming out on your plate. Tell me. You’ve been busy.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, you know, it’s been exciting, even though I’ve kind of stepped away from actually getting inside the ring. Right. Kind of stepping in and doing other things, even outside the ring, trying to stay involved in something that I love, which was the combat industry. So there’s a couple things that got going. One of them is… We have an organization where we’ve actually done two fights so far. We’ve done in Florida. And it’s true bare knuckle. And the reason why I jumped into that was because I saw what was going on in mixed martial arts. And, you know, they put gloves on and, you know, talk about safety. And the reality of it is I fought with gloves and no gloves. And I always felt like I took more damage with gloves on than I ever did with bare knuckle. Really? I mean, I got lacerations or broken nose, maybe broken hand. But as far as the amount of punishment that I took on my brain, I felt like I sustained so much more with the gloves on because guys were able to protect their hands, not my head. Like they didn’t put gloves on to protect the head. They put it on to protect the hand. So that tells you something right there. Like, oh, I’m going to throw more punches. I’m going to hit this guy more often and I’m not going to hurt my hand. That makes sense. So I thought, you know, if I ever had the opportunity, I’m going to, you know, change that. And I’m going to go back to what I thought was pure and more real. And that was bare knuckle. And so we’ve done a couple fights, been successful, got some great business partners. And we’re really at just the beginning of restructuring and building this thing and really making a move on the combat industry. And that’s one of them. That right there kind of brings me to where we’ve actually met some other people that kind of align with what we were doing. Survivor Man, I don’t know if you’ve heard of it, but it’s on Pursuit Channel.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, I’ve heard of Survivor Man.
SPEAKER 03 :
That’s where we’re going. Mr. Man, Survivor Man, his last name’s actually Man, and he is a SEAL Team 6 guy. I mean, look him up. I mean, he is decorated. He’s amazing. He’s like Captain America. He’s a bad man. Dang, when you’re saying that. Yeah, he’s a bad man. I mean, I think I’m tough. That dude’s triple times tougher than me, man. I don’t want to mess with him. Wow. Wow. But this show is incredible because it is a lot aligned with how I used to train fighters. You know, where it was like push them to the limit, push them past what they think they’re capable of doing. This is what Survivorman does. I love that. So I’m like completely into this thing. I know we had actually met because I was playing golf up here with Blitnikoff’s tournament here. Where they do charity for battered women and children. So I’ve been doing that for about 20 years. And I met somebody there, Bronco, who actually introduced me to these guys that were doing this show. Because he felt like this was lying right with you. And he’s right. And I saw a clip of it and I was like, oh man, I want to do this. So we ended up contacting him. kind of met everybody and started to meet some of the people mr. Mann and a few others and I’m just Everything just seemed to line right up like this is exact Providence Yeah, it’s like bringing me back to old school and I’m like, I didn’t think we could do this anymore. I love that Yeah, bring back this macho
SPEAKER 01 :
you know where it’s not so corporatized and you have like real fighter skill where you got to kind of think outside the box because anything i mean i feel like especially when you’re talking about bare knuckle there’s just there’s a skill set i appreciate it i watch my husband is crazy into ufc i love i like the fighter story so i get another woman aspect of it like i i started following you and watching all your matches and i’m like i like mr shamrock he’s Such a nice man. Such a nice guy. But it is, it’s a total, it’s a different skill. Correct me if I’m wrong on that. It’s a different way of approaching hand-to-hand combat. It’s definitely, I think, like an elevated skill.
SPEAKER 03 :
It really is because if you’re not looking closely at it to how those things actually play out when it comes to the bare knuckle and actually having a glove on your hand, you don’t really notice it unless you’re in it. And the one thing that is the biggest difference between the glove and the hand is that it’s less power. You cannot be swinging for the fences or throwing hard punches because if you miss, you break your hand and fight’s over. So it’s really about more accuracy, more footwork, and it also limits the amount of brain damage that you take over years and years of training because you’re not sparring as much. You don’t have to. It’s more about accuracy and speed and footwork. So it really is. And I think we’re at the actual beginning point of you know when UFC came in it was kind of this cult following it was a small group of people and then it went mainstream and then all of a sudden everybody got to see it and it was like oh my goodness this stuff is awesome I think that’s where Bare Knuckle is right now where it’s it’s it’s kind of got this following but we really haven’t gone mainstream yet yeah but we got to package it right we got to deliver it right and then we’ve also got to be able to put in the The actual stuff that we’ve found over the past few years of the medical findings on this, on how it’s safer. That’s huge. And not taking as much brain damage when you’re putting gloves on.
SPEAKER 01 :
That’s absolutely huge because I never had honestly ever thought about that, the presence of the glove and all of that. So Ken Shamrock, surviving man. And then you also have the Legends contract because you’re going to be coming back with WWE as well. I mean, we’re running out of time. I would love to have you back anytime that you want to come on. Anytime you want to talk about anything, you know, you got an open mic here.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, I really appreciate it, man. And yeah, right now things are awesome, man. I’m blessed. You know, I’ve had a great career and I’m not done. There you go. Where can people go and find everything that you’re up to and read more about Bare Knuckle? Yeah, True Bare Knuckle, you can go to TrueBareKnuckle.com. And then, you know, Surviving Man is a pursuit channel. I know there’s a few other places, but I can’t remember off the top of my head.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, I’ve seen it advertised. Yeah. So, awesome.
SPEAKER 03 :
It’s a great show. I’m going to be watching. If you really want a man’s sport. And for women, too. I don’t want to get beat up by my wife. Women love the drama of dudes in combat.
SPEAKER 01 :
They like the drama. There’s something about it. When you know it’s an athletic, skilled, artistic match, there’s a drama and a pageantry in it that I think is very appealing to women. We like it.
SPEAKER 03 :
I don’t know. I think she’s being modest. I also think she likes it because they don’t have their shirts on either.
SPEAKER 01 :
I would never say that. I would never say such a thing. Mr. Shamrock. All right.
SPEAKER 03 :
We got to get moving.
SPEAKER 01 :
Ken Shamrock. You can follow him on X at Shamrock Ken. Congratulations, my friend, on all your success and more success to come. God bless you. Appreciate you. All Family Pharmacy. You just need to bookmark this website. I’ve never been to a website where they make it easier to get the medicines that you need. And look for like, I get it. If you want to go to a doctor and you want to have, they have doctors that are on their staff that you can actually talk to. So for instance, when I over Thanksgiving, I was getting super sick. I had sinusitis and it was turning into strep and I had people coming on. I was hosting for Thanksgiving. I don’t have time for this. So I went on all family pharmacies website, all family pharma. And I use my own code name. I’m not going to even lie about it. I dropped my own name and I got it discounted for 10% off. It’s all familypharma.com slash Dana. And I was able to get my azithromycin because if I were to go to my doctor, that’s the exact same thing they’re going to prescribe me. This ain’t my first rodeo. And then I had it overnighted. Got here at 9 a.m. 9 a.m. I ordered this stuff at like 7 o’clock last night. So it was amazing how quickly that they got it there. Anything that you need. This is a must have when you’re traveling. They have everything. Ivermectin, which I take ahead of big events for the antiviral properties. But they have all kinds of reliable options for a variety of health needs. Be prepared. Skip the hassle. And here’s the kicker. Big thing. Big, big, big. Their stuff is made in the USA, not China. So you hear about a lot of antibiotics being made in CCP China. Not these. It’s all USA. So you do not have to worry about outsourced products. You’re getting good quality, safe material. Visit allfamilypharma.com slash Dana. Get 10% off using promo code Dana10. Don’t wait. Make sure that you’re always prepared. Protect yourself and your family. Allfamilypharma.com slash Dana. Code Dana10 to save 10%.
SPEAKER 02 :
Superman derives his power from the yellow sun. DC politicians get their power by giving handouts. In 1913, the tax code was 400 pages long. Today, it’s 75,000. This is how politicians derive their power. Check out the Watchdog on Wall Street podcast on Apple, Spotify, wherever you get your podcasts.
SPEAKER 06 :
And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
SPEAKER 01 :
Oh, you guys are going to be so sad. This is such a sad headline. CNN is going to lay off hundreds of employees as a post inauguration transformation begins. You know why they’re laying off employees? I keep so I’m not in my regular studio, so I feel like I can, you know, be a little wilder. I got to be very careful. The reason that they. are not that they’re having to lay off all these employees is because it’s been a poonado. It’s been a horrible fecal storm of nonsense. That’s why. It’s because they’re so biased. Take it for somebody who was the token conservative there back in 2012. And then they never really ingratiated conservatives in the company. They never really ingratiated them with upper management, et cetera, et cetera. So that’s why. Because people are tired of watching that nonsense. They’re tired of it. Also, I guess they’re bringing back Duck Dynasty at A&E. Where has it been? Has it been on this whole time? Still? So it’s going to be the revival. And apparently it’s coming back to A&E. The last episode aired in 2017. I did not know that.
SPEAKER 07 :
It’s been that long?
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, I did not know that. By the way, how sad is it? Like a couple of years passed and we’re all like, it’s been that long? That’s so wild. What? NFL suffers playoffs ratings blow for division round despite ESPN’s record as the Bills and Ravens failed to deliver big numbers. Why is that? They just didn’t like who was playing? Like, what’s up? Whoa, what does that mean?
SPEAKER 06 :
There’s a lot of different speculation. Some people sour, some people not. But it could be just a simple Nielsen ratings thing. So we don’t know yet. We’ll see.
SPEAKER 01 :
I don’t know. That’s very unlike your typical tinfoil hat stuff. I’m not satisfied with that answer. Former VP Kamala Harris. There’s now they’re saying that there’s turmoil because the word is that she’s blaming his scandals for her losing the presidency. She’s got, you know, as a strong, empowered woman. It’s paramount that you pass the buck to the closest male. That’s how that works, right? So his scandals, remember the nanny scandal? It’s all being blamed for her losing. Not the fact that she just copied and pasted Joe Biden’s policies or that people retired under living under this Democrat regime. That’s why. In addition to that, the Gulf of America is already appearing in government documents. They said that the shock and awe orders kick in. That’s what they’re calling it, shock and awe orders. But they said now already in government documents, Florida was the first. The U.S. Coast Guard has now officially used the Gulf of America in their press release when they were announcing the immediate action in support of the executive orders from the president. So they said, they said Gulf of America. They said it. So it’s now, I mean, it’s like, I guess after it’s been used in enough places, government documents, then yeah, then it works. There you go. So that’s pretty, huh? That’s pretty interesting. And, uh, also I had a couple of other things for actually, you know what? I should probably, cause I’m not going to get this headline in. So we have Ken Shamrock who’s coming up. Uh, I know he’s got that what WWE legends that he’s coming back with. I read an interview with him where he was talking about why he’d never wanted to get into the ring with China. And that was kind of like a contributing factor to him, uh, exiting. Very interesting, you know, especially when boys are playing girls sports. Stick with us. You want to hear a funny non-political story? I wasn’t going to talk about it, but one of my friends, Dark Storm Norm, who’s got the most beautiful, had the most beautiful Frenchie, and we both had brindles. He’s here. He’s a vet. You know, one of the sweetest guys. And they have a booth here at SHOT Show. And he had his Norm, his dog, his Frenchie. That dog had its own power wheels. That dog was like privileged. That dog had its own power wheels. It would drive around like the dog didn’t, but he would. And he lost his dog recently. And he was there with a friend who has a Belgian Malinois. And you guys know we had, we got a rescue pup. So he’s like part Belgian Malinois and part Rhodesian Ridgeback. And I’m used to, I’ve had working breeds before, but that was, you know, when I was like, 20 or when I was a teenager different now when you’re like 40 it’s a lot different now to have to have a working break dog now so wick is not having a good time he is with Nana And Nana has been watching all kinds of dog videos. Nana and Wick watch videos, animal videos together. And she talks to him like he’s a person. She treats him like a grandchild. And he lost his mind and totally destroyed everything. Well, he totally destroyed the floor in our bedroom where he sleeps because he was mad at being put to bed. So we’re… I don’t know what to do. So anyway… Before we adopted Wick, I’m going to tell you this story, and then we’re going to get a meat and potatoes. I swear to you guys, you’re going to use this to make fun of me, and I’m going to let you have this because I’m in a good mood. I was driving. I was going to the tailor, right? I had to pick up a business jacket. Actually, I think it was the brown version of this one that I’m wearing right now. I had to go pick up this jacket, right, because the sleeves were a little long. I was getting a tailor. And I’m driving, right, and I see this mangy-looking gray dog, right? Now, can I just preface this by saying animals in Missouri are a lot bigger than animals in Texas. Like, whitetail are huge in Missouri. Here in Texas, they’re, like, anemic. It’s weird. But you get what I’m saying. Like, even the, all the wildlife is bigger up there. So I see this, like, mangy, like, gray, dirty dog. I’m like, oh, my gosh. that is a free pet, you know, and I’m pulling my car over and I get out of my car and I’m like walking to the dog. I’m like, I don’t have no snacks or nothing to lure. I was like, woo, you know, pop, pop, pop. And the dog acted like it was going to come over to me and then it ran off. And I’m like, I mean, it got real close to me. It was like three feet away. And then it was like sniffing at me and then ran away. And I was so upset. No sooner did I get home than Glenn Story, who owns Patriot Mobile, text me because he lives in my neighborhood. He text me and he’s like, did you see this? There is a coyote that is roaming the neighborhood. And I got a picture of it. It was and he sent me that it was that dog. It was that dog. I literally almost caught a coyote and took it home. Now, I say, I know what coyotes look like, yes, but they are so much smaller in Texas than they are in Missouri. It’s just weird. Animals are bigger up north. But I literally almost brought home a face-eating coyote. Can you imagine if I would have gotten that thing in my like like Ricky Bobby from Talladega Nights with the Puma in the back? Can you imagine if I got that damn coyote in my car and my rig and took that thing home? Oh, my gosh. And I didn’t say anything at first. And I was like, I think I saw it. And Chris immediately knew he immediately knew. He’s like, woman, did you try to take that damn dog home? He immediately knew because he looked at my face and he’s like, did you try to take it home? Do you want to hear one more funny story? I’m in a good mood. You want to hear one more? Alright. So, I got into a wreck over Christmas. I’m fine. It’s fine. It’s a long story. That’s not the point. The point is this. So, I pull up, you know, we’re doing the post-accident stuff, and it was totally not my fault. We’re doing the post-accident stuff. And I called, you know, the police, the non-emergency number, and I called my husband. I was like, uh, my husband is best compared to Rip from Yellowstone. And… In certain occasions, I can be Beth, right? Legitimately, shut up, Kane. Shut up. I’ve never seen you look so smug in your life. Not even talking to you right now. Why am I talking about this instead of meat and potatoes? What? I don’t know. Anyway, so. He knows me because I can be very aggressive and overpowering sometimes. So he gets there before the police do. He’s in his big old rig. He’s got giant tires. I can’t even get in and out of that thing without ladders and help. You know, I fell out of it in the Tom Thumb parking lot one time just after church going in to get some bread. I look like a fool anyway. So he pulls up immediately, like parks perfectly in one move, swings the door open and he comes around the corner of the car and he goes, you over there. Cause he knew immediately my, he’s like you over there, like total rip. Like I don’t have time for you’re crazy right now. And then I looked at his feet. Cane. My husband, I don’t let my husband leave the house looking a mess because that’s not what proper wives do.
SPEAKER 06 :
This is an accident. This is an emergency situation just in his defense.
SPEAKER 01 :
Anyway, I look at his feet. He’s got on cherry red socks and camo Crocs. Camo Crocs. That is the thing that exists. And he wears them proudly after saying he would never wear such a shoe. And I forgot all about my accident. And I was like, what in the hell is on your feet? And he was like, woman, you call me saying that you got into an accident. I’m not going to be putting on fancy shoes. Look, can we focus on that? And I couldn’t get over it. I’m like, oh my gosh. I felt like a teenager. I’m like, what is on your feet? Like, why did you leave the house wearing red socks and camo Crocs? And he just stares at me. And he goes, get over there. Handled it. Walked to the airport. Vegas. Going to the airport. Coming out here in those damn camo Crocs. I’m going to find them and set them on fire. Anyway, I thought you would all enjoy a little personal information. I may not ever do it again because I’m just anticipating the amount. I hope the chat’s entertained. You guys will be entertained by that. I’m going to try to get a picture of the Crocs, but long story short, you know, he didn’t care. He was coming in clutch with them cherry red socks and camo Crocs. I can’t even deal. So I… Yeah, tried to take home a coyote and all that stuff. Anyway, a friend of mine, there’s all kinds of service dogs that are here, too. You’ll have a lot of veterans at this event, SHOT Show in Vegas. And I know you don’t pet the service dogs because they’re working, but it takes everything I have because I feel like I’m Snow White, right? And animals talk to me, and butterflies will land on my arms, and birds will help put ribbons in my hair, and the mice will set out my slippers. I feel like I really could be that. And so I see the dogs and I’m like, pet? You know, in my head. And I’m like, no, Dana, you can’t pet them. That dog is a hard worker. Working nine to five. And then Dolly Parton comes in on my head, you know. Working nine to five. And I can’t pet them.
SPEAKER 06 :
All of that is normal.
SPEAKER 01 :
Takes everything I have. 100% normal. When he told me I could pet his dog, I lost my mind. I was like…
SPEAKER 02 :
Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
