Join host Angie Austin as she welcomes Wally Long, who opens up about his own path through incredible personal tragedies, including the murder of his brother and the near loss of his niece and nephew. Wally shares insights from his book ‘Why Me, Lord?’ and offers a heartfelt discussion on the power of faith to navigate life’s most difficult trials. This episode offers hope, resilience, and the reminder that grace and peace can be found amidst the storms of life.
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SPEAKER 03 :
Welcome to The Good News with Angie Austin. Now, with The Good News, here’s Angie.
SPEAKER 08 :
Hey there, friend. Angie Austin here with The Good News, speaking with Rachel Kerr Schneider. The widow chose Red, My Journey with Jesus, John, and ALS. Her sons were 10 and 14 when her husband, John, husband of 21 years, was diagnosed with ALS. He was in his late 40s, and her faith really got her through this. and there’s something really interesting in your book that I thought you should share in addition to your faith. I know you didn’t tell your boys right away about the diagnosis that your husband had this fatal illness, and at 10 and 14, I can understand that. How long did you wait, and why did you wait?
SPEAKER 07 :
We chose to wait about a year, Angie, because John was not, to the naked eye, John was not that symptomatic. You had to look really closely to see that. His foot was dropped and his gait was off. So the boys, you know, they didn’t really see anything. About a year later, and we needed time to fortify ourselves. There’s so much shock there. Imagine if you were given the diagnosis you’ve got two to five years to live. What would you do? How does that even compute? You have a disease of which there is no cure. There’s no option. There’s no treatment. There’s nothing. You just really manage the progression and wait to die. We needed, John and I needed some time to figure out how to process this and kind of get our heads around it. We only told our immediate family, which, you know, lived, mine was in Australia, his was in California. So because we knew, too, Angie, you know, good news travels fast, bad news travels faster. And we knew the minute that we told those boys, you know, they’d be telling their friends, my dad’s been diagnosed with this thing, ALS. And we knew that the tsunami would start, so we had to make sure that we could fortify ourselves. And so it was interesting. About a year later, John was getting more symptomatic. They could tell something was wrong with Dad. And we sat them down, and there were three questions that my youngest son, Jake, asked. And the first one was, Dad, are you going to be in a wheelchair? And he answered yes. And then, Dad, are you going to get out of the wheelchair? And John said, probably not. And then Jake asked, are you going to get better? And it was at that moment that my husband just fell apart. And I said, you know what? You know what, boys? We serve a great God, and he can make Daddy better. And we are going to pray every night that he does. But in the meantime, our job is to take care of Daddy well. as best as we can. And that was all we said. Angie, we did not, you know, daddy’s going to die and dah, dah, dah, dah. No, we didn’t lie to them, but we didn’t throw up on them either with all of this other information. Now also remember too, at this time, the internet didn’t exist. Social media didn’t exist like it does now. So the boys, they didn’t have access to all of that, which was a blessing, an absolute blessing. But sure enough, within 15 minutes, I got a text Rachel, Sam says, John told him, John’s got, are you sure about this? And I said, yes. And I got, you know, the OMG back. And then, you know, and then it was like wildfire, right? Right. So we found ourselves actually trying to comfort some of our friends because, you know, because it is a shock. We’d had a little more time, but it was still a difficult thing to do, no doubt.
SPEAKER 08 :
Now, so you had moved 15 times in seven years with your husband of 21 years. You were in Minnesota at the time, and obviously you hadn’t lived in places very long if you moved that many times for his job. You’re with all these wonderful Minnesota nice people, and you end up staying there even though you hadn’t been that entrenched in the community, and they just completely embraced you. Yeah. you know, in terms of your relationship with your sons and their faith, talk a little bit about how they handled this diagnosis. And then I really want to get into, you know, the title of the book to the widow chose red. So let’s start with the boys, their faith and their journey, because I’m sure that was extremely painful for you.
SPEAKER 07 :
It was it was difficult. And and I think the hardest thing for us as parents, right, is when we don’t have the answers. they’re asking questions. Why does this happen? Why is Daddy sick? Did God make Daddy sick? You know, these are the kinds of things that you just kind of go, okay, let’s sit down and talk about that. And also framing it in a way, when you’re 10 and 14, there are different places in what they can comprehend as well. And so, you know, but we were a very faith-based family. You know, the boy’s went through confirmation. We had been in church all of their lives. But it’s also about bringing home a concept that may be somewhat abstract and making it real, right? And so I think they were able to watch their dad and I have our own conversations in prayer time with Jesus and pour out our hearts And, you know, we model that for our kids. They see what we do. They pick up on every little thing. And, you know, even now, you know, even now my boys are like, Mom, you are like completely sold out for Jesus. Do you think you want to be an influencer? I said, yes, I want to influence people for Jesus. That’s what I want to do. And, you know, but they have both gone through their own struggles as they’ve grown up, and they’ve dealt with their grief very differently now. And even today, though, I can see in their struggles and how they’ve handled it, their own reliance on their belief and knowing that he never leaves us. He never leaves us. We may feel alone. We may feel isolated. We may have questions, but he is always there with us no matter what. And even though we may not get the outcome that we want, when we want it. You know, I remember a pastor telling me, Rachel, you have to be prepared. John may not get healed on this side. It may happen on the other side. And, you know, I very clearly said, well, you know, miracles still happen every day, and I’m trusting that. And I did for a very, very long time, Andy. But I’ve never once, you know, I’ve never once been mad at God. Like, why did you do this to me? My question, why not? You know, I mean, why not? So obviously, I’ve waited a while to share this story because I had to go and raise my boys after John died. And being a single mom with two young boys, that’s a whole nother, that’ll be the second book. But this, I chose to wear red because red is the color of love. It’s the color of passion. And it is also the color of fire. which is represented in the flame of the Holy Spirit. And one of my goals is to remind each and every one of us about the supernatural power that has been gifted inside of each one of us, which is the power of the Holy Spirit, which I believe so many of us forget that we have and that we can call upon when we are in those moments of crisis and have no idea what to pray for, what to ask for, how to do it. That’s when we can say, okay, Holy Spirit, you take over. Please intercede for me.
SPEAKER 08 :
You know, a lot of it I can’t even wrap my head around, so I can see why you waited to write it, but I can see why you wrote The Widow Chose Red, My Journey with Jesus, John and ALS, because you told me that the Lord was so real to you and such. I don’t even know how people get through things like this without their faith.
SPEAKER 07 :
Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. I wonder the same thing myself. And here’s the thing too, Angie, because even as believers, we struggle. We struggle. We do. And God never promised us an easy time of it. I mean, all I have to do is remember what Jesus went through on that cross for our behalf. Who are we to think that we’re going to get through this world unscathed? Really? You know, but it’s all about how do we then, what do we do? What do we do with this? And how do we embrace it, which sounds really weird, but it’s true. Because, you know, I don’t believe that God made John sick, but I do believe that he allows us to be tested. Look at Job. Look how Job was tested. Look what was taken and done to him. And yet he remained faithful. He remained faithful to his God and still managed to give him all the glory. So I really want to encourage and inspire anyone who is finding themselves in a hard place. And we may not just get one. We may have to do this a couple of times. But what I know is that when you are faced with something this difficult and when you get to the end of the rope and think, I can’t hang on anymore, that’s when you cling to him and say, okay. I am surrendering it to you completely and totally. I have nowhere else to go. I don’t know how to do this. You are going to have to step in and be with me and show me how.
SPEAKER 08 :
You know, on the cover of the book, you’re wearing red and you’re with your sons in their suits. Is that actually the day of the funeral? Is that the photo that you took that day?
SPEAKER 07 :
Absolutely. Absolutely. My sister took that photo on the spur of the moment. We were walking outside of the front door. I’ve had people ask me if that’s been photoshopped. No. Did I drop the two boys in? No. And both of the boys are actually wearing one of their father’s ties. So they may look a little large, but yes, that was the actual photo right before we were headed to the church that day.
SPEAKER 08 :
And you’re smiling. The boys aren’t smiling, but you’re smiling and you’re wearing red. What did that celebration of life look like to you rather than like a traditional funeral and you wearing red for love and red for the Holy Spirit?
SPEAKER 07 :
You know, first of all, because they were the ages that they were, we had 600 people there and a lot of kids, a lot of kids. The boys, Jake’s football team, they were all in their jerseys. John’s lacrosse team, they were all in it. There was such solidarity with the community and all of these kids. So it was kid-friendly. I had parents go, is there going to be a body lane? I said no. John was cremated, photos, flowers. And the boys actually were part of the service. They recited a beautiful poem called The Dash. We had wristbands made with John’s name on it that said, live your dash. So everyone was able to wear those. And then the boys wanted to have the reception. We had one right after the service. They wanted to serve pizza. So we had pizza because that’s what the boys wanted. And then later that evening, we had a more formal, well, a celebration of life party for John. That was more like what their dad would want it. But, But it was a beautiful, and I will tell you there are QR codes in the book where you can actually log into and watch the boys recite that poem. You can actually, I had the presence of mind enough, Angie, to hire a videographer to be there to record it so that, because I knew I wouldn’t remember it right, and I wanted these boys to be able to hear the stories about their father, not only at the Celebration of Life service, but also at the party afterwards, so they can hear people to this day talk about their father. Yes. Yes, and so we also had Pastor Greg, who baptized both of the boys. He was able to fly in from Chicago and be a part of this service as well. He’s a big part of our story. I think your readers will find it interesting how we met him as a young married couple. We reconnected with him. We started out in King of Prussia, Pennsylvania. We reconnected in Chicago. And then he actually, you know, was part of a service for John’s younger brother who had passed 10 years earlier and then came back and did John’s service as well.
SPEAKER 08 :
Well, I want to have you back on the show because there’s so much more to your story. The Widow Chose Red, My Journey with Jesus, John and ALS, Rachel Kerr Schneider. Do you have a website that you can give us?
SPEAKER 07 :
I do. It is spiritedprosperity.com. You can also go to thewidowchoseread.com and order the book directly there. It is on Amazon, too, and proceeds from the sale of the book will benefit the Live Like Blue Foundation.
SPEAKER 08 :
Thank you, Rachel. We’ll talk to you hopefully next week.
SPEAKER 07 :
Thank you, Angie. Take care. Godspeed.
SPEAKER 05 :
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SPEAKER 02 :
Glendale, thanks for tuning in to KLTT, the mighty 670.
SPEAKER 08 :
Hey there, Angie Austin with the good news along with Wally Long. He is the author of Why Me, Lord? Biblical and Practical Answers for Suffering in Our Lives. He joined us last week and about 12 years ago, he was the first guest on my show. And we are going to kind of work our way through his book, Why Me, Lord? Welcome back, Wally.
SPEAKER 06 :
Hey, thank you for having me on, Angie. It’s a pleasure to be back with you.
SPEAKER 08 :
And for people who haven’t heard your approximately, I’d say, four visits on my show, I met you when you flew out to the eastern plains of Colorado due to a family tragedy. People may have heard out in the Burlington area, your brother and your sister-in-law were killed and your niece and nephew, Sarah and Ethan, Sarah five at the time and Ethan nine died. They didn’t know if they’d make it. And then within a short period of time, they found out it was your 12-year-old nephew who had killed his parents. And, you know, great homeschooling family. You ended up, I think, in the end after you adopted Sarah and Ethan with, did I get that right, 13 kids? Well, with the kids that are your brothers that you didn’t adopt. Yeah. Yes, essentially. Yes, essentially. You ended up with 13 kids total. Oh, my goodness. That is so crazy. Six of your own. Your brother had seven. And your wife homeschooled all. But just recently, Sarah, she’s graduating. She’s an honor student. The kids are doing all so well. And Wally left… working in the prison system, and then he did some work as a pastor. He’s written this book. And I thought, you know, let’s have Wally just continue to come back and kind of work our way through his book. Does that sound good to you, Wally?
SPEAKER 06 :
Sounds very good. Thank you.
SPEAKER 08 :
I love it. So, you know, just give everybody just kind of a little snippet of why you wrote the book, and then let’s get into chapter one.
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, I wrote the book because after that, the murder of my brother and his wife, the It left me with a lot of questions as we struggled just to survive and make the next day. I had a lot of questions in my heart, and part of one of those questions, a big one, was why me? Why is all this happening to me? And as I began to search the Scriptures for answers, I believe God gave me a sermon that I started to preach in a couple of places, had a lot of very good feedback from that sermon, and it blessed me just preparing the sermon and studying for it. And the answers that God gave me for that sermon became the foundation of this book. And I felt like I believe that it’s a message that a lot of people in our society today need to hear. It’s a message that a lot of people have that same question. Why is all of this happening to me? And I wanted to help encourage people by giving them the answers that I believe the Lord gave me.
SPEAKER 08 :
Oh, I love that. I absolutely love that. All right, so tell us about Chapter 1, Wally Long’s book, Why Me, Lord?
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, Chapter 1, I deal with basic general thoughts about suffering from the Scriptures. Essentially, I think the most important thing we need to understand is that suffering is not God’s plan for humanity. God created a perfect world, and it wasn’t until sin came into the world that suffering came along with it. So once suffering came into the world through Adam and Eve’s sin, then suffering became a normal part of our lives. Now it’s so normal that we all go through tragedy. We all go through difficult times. We all suffer in our lives. And it’s because of the sin that came into the world. So I discussed the basics of suffering in our lives, that it’s normal for us now. that not all difficulties or trials or tribulations are equal. Some people go through very tragic circumstances. Some people, the trials they face are small. But over time, the buildup of those small trials becomes almost unbearable. It’s one thing after another, after another, after another. And we’ve all been there where things seem to pile up on us. None of them in themselves are huge, but when they pile up on you, it becomes a very difficult time in your life. So I discussed basics of suffering in our lives, our responses to the suffering. I also, one of the big things I talk about in chapter one is that I believe all of the trials that we go through are bearable. We can make it through every one of them. I believe God gives us, or God allows trials to come into our lives. Things happen in our lives for a variety of reasons, but God always makes a way for us to get through, not to escape by jumping out of the trials. Trials don’t work that way. Suffering doesn’t work that way. We don’t just escape it, but we can get through it. We can bear under the pressure that we find ourselves in. I believe God makes a way for us to bear those things.
SPEAKER 08 :
You know, I want to just pop in there. One thing I forgot to mention at the top, not only were you dealing with this tragedy of your 12-year-old nephew, I mean, it’s hard to even say, murdering your brother and your sister-in-law and almost killing Sarah and Ethan at five and nine, but your son had lost his leg in a motorcycle accident shortly before that, and one of your siblings, your 40-year-old sister, had committed suicide. I mean, that is a time, I think, after all three of those family tragedies that you say, Oh, my. Really? Like, how much more can I bear? Are you kidding me?
SPEAKER 06 :
Exactly. Exactly. That’s where that’s where I found myself. I was just literally in survival mode. I we just our motto became just take the next step, just do the next thing, because we had no mental or emotional capacity to think past the moment to think about tomorrow other than to schedule appointments for the kids or counseling sessions and It was just a day-to-day survival for us, just making it through.
SPEAKER 08 :
And I have to say your wife, Sylvia, is amazing, and you as well. But, I mean, your marriage not only survived this but thrived. You’ve been married 40-some-odd years now?
SPEAKER 06 :
Almost 44 years. In July, it would be 44 years.
SPEAKER 08 :
Oh, my goodness. So you almost need to write how your marriage survived tragedy.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, yeah. That would be a good topic.
SPEAKER 08 :
Okay, so get back into the lesson. So you can survive these trials, you’re saying. I mean, obviously you’re an example of that, but continue on.
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, the very last thing I discussed in Chapter 1, and it’s something that for a lot of people it may not be a novel lesson to learn, but for me it was. I had been taught throughout my Christian childhood or growing up as a Christian in early years as a Christian that the one question you don’t ask God is why. It’s almost like, you know, if you ask why, then you don’t have enough faith, and you don’t trust God, or you don’t believe God. And I felt that way for a long time, and as I was going through this struggle, I felt like, what’s wrong with me as a Christian now? Here I am asking God why, wondering why do I not have enough faith? And as in my studies and in my search for answers, I came across a number of Psalms where David asks God, why not? There are several Psalms where David says, why are you, why have you abandoned me? Why have you turned your face? He actually, he once saw me actually says, God, why are you sleeping awake? Save me. Why are you sleeping on the job? He felt abandoned in his trial and, And so I think it’s not wrong to ask God why. I think we should ask God why. We should look for answers. We should pray because asking God why is praying. We are praying as we converse with God saying, why is this happening to me? And God wants us to pray. And I believe if we submit ourselves to his will, then he begins to calm our hearts and give us maybe the answers that we search for.
SPEAKER 08 :
All right, so what do you want people to put into action when they hear these? What are some things that might help us tackle these? Because I just think some people give up.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yes, yes. I think a couple things is remember that what you’re going through, as difficult as it may be, is not uncommon to mankind. It’s not uncommon. You’re not alone there. Other people have faced things just as difficult and many times more difficult. But still, the suffering you face for you seems like the worst thing in the world. And for you, it very well could be. Everybody has different intensity of trial and suffering. But for each individual, what you’re going through is not unique, although it is still your trial. and you have to face it. The other thing to keep in mind, I think, is that there are people that can walk through those with you. Because it’s not common to other people, because it’s not uncommon to other people and to the rest of humanity, there are people that have faced difficult times, and if you will just take the moment to reach out and talk to others about what you’re going through, it may help you find answers. I know for me it did. I found myself in the aftermath of our series of trials in those early years after my brother’s death, I found myself talking to complete strangers about what had happened to us. It was weird because I never did that kind of thing before, but I’d be on an airplane flying somewhere, and when you’re talking to a seatmate on an airplane, you talk about your family and how many kids you have and And I’d say eight children. Wow, that’s a lot of kids. And I said, well, but the two of them are adopted. Oh, did you international adoption? And then the story would just come out. I would just tell, no, they were my niece and nephew. My brother and his wife were murdered. And as I began to share that story, I found both a salve of relief by getting it out of my heart, by not keeping it bottled up. And then there were people that were kind enough to say, oh, I’m so sorry, I didn’t don’t know exactly how you feel, but I’ve gone through some things too. And they, just that conversation with somebody else understanding, or at least extending some sympathy to me, I found to be healing. So I think the important, rather than bottling up our grief and our discomfort, our anxieties in the middle of our trials, instead of bottling them up, talk to people, talk to someone. And certainly we can find someone that maybe has some experience in life that might be able to just sit and listen to you. If not even talk to you, just sit and listen. The process of listening, I think, helps. The process of speaking to someone who will listen helps us to heal. So I would say, yes, you’re not alone. You can get through it. It doesn’t seem like it right now, but keep taking the next step. Talk to people. and allow God to work what he’s trying to do then through your trial, through your tragedy.
SPEAKER 08 :
You know, I think that, you know, you speaking to so many people, which you hadn’t done before, obviously helping them as well, saying, well, if Wally can deal with that, then I can certainly deal with my situation. You know, and I think that so many of us get bottled or caught in our own little, you know, first world problems of a flat tire and our kid got a D and, you know, grandma’s, you know, crabby who’s living with us or whatever. And. So over the course of this decade plus now at 13 years, I can’t even imagine the people that you’ve touched and how God has used you, especially getting into the ministry as you’ve done since this all happened. And now writing the book, how many more people you can help through their trials as well. I mean, it’s really pretty amazing how much sharing your testimony can help others. And I know you’ve done that a lot as well. We’ve got about a minute left. What’s the feedback been as you’ve shared your story?
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, I’ve had a lot of feedback from people. You can see a lot of it on Amazon. Some of the reviews have been amazing, very sobering and humbling to me. But one gentleman who’s older and doesn’t do Amazon, doesn’t do online things, purchased a copy of my book. He’s a friend of my church member. He read the book and he wrote me a letter and he said, this book, from now on and the rest of my life, second only to my Bible. He said, I will read it on a regular basis and Because what I’ve received out of this book that God allowed you to write has been such a blessing to me. I will read it regularly for the answers that God needs to give me.
SPEAKER 08 :
Oh, it’s wonderful.
SPEAKER 06 :
Because this man has been walking with God for years. He’s an elderly Christian gentleman that just – and what he wrote to me was – Very, very humbling.
SPEAKER 08 :
Wow. Wally will be back, and we’ll work on Chapter 2. Again, why me, Lord? Wally Long, wallylong.com. Thank you, friend. Thank you. Thank you.
SPEAKER 03 :
Thank you for listening to The Good News with Angie Austin on AM670 KLTT.
SPEAKER 01 :
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