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Join Dana as she delves into the wacky world of Florida Man where wild headlines reveal a state with its own unique set of challenges. From late-night burnouts to a man’s near brush with a flesh-eating bacteria, the stories are as captivating as they are head-scratching. Dana skillfully navigates these bizarre tales with her signature wit and insight, painting a portrait of life in the Sunshine State that you won’t soon forget.
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Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.
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It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
SPEAKER 03 :
Hmm, Florida Man almost hit police officers doing a burnout to impress the ladies. Man, save some grills for the rest of them, won’t you? The late-night crowd in downtown Bradenton got smoked when police said a driver turned Main Street into his own burnout pit. It was about 2 in the morning. Their crime reduction team heard a truck hammer its throttle, saw a silver pickup fly down the street. The driver identified as 28-year-old Juan Leon. swerved past pedestrians and officers standing nearby after running a stop sign. He corrected just before he reached the next avenue where a red light forced him to stop. But instead of cooling off, he spun the tires in the crosswalk, filling the intersection with smoke, then lurched forward, forcing officers to step back. When he was detained, he got, oh boy, DUI also. And he was booked on three counts of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon because he also performed field sobriety tests, declined a breathalyzer. He told them that he was trying to impress girls. The officers were not impressed with his answer. You can imagine. Also, this. What a headline. OK, let’s. Cape Coral man accused of causing mother significant number of stab wounds.
SPEAKER 07 :
Who worded that?
SPEAKER 03 :
So these siblings got their brother arrested because he stabbed their mother. So what does that mean? You’re accused of causing significant. That’s like I caused you to get punched in the face by my fist. You know what I mean? Like what in the world is that? That’s like newspeak. The guy was arrested. But what stands out and what I can’t get past is this insane headline. What is it? It’s from News Press, which is like an actual news site. They cover Florida. But too many Christmas. That’s pretty heavy lifting there with that whole sentence. A Florida man believes that he was infected with flesh eating bacteria while cutting grass. What? This was in Jacksonville. He was hospitalized. He was in there for weeks. He battled flesh-eating bacteria. He said that he was cutting weeds and grass in a ditch that runs alongside of his house. And he said that he thinks that that’s what happened because it hit his legs the most. And he said that… I mean, they thought they were going to have to… I mean, this is how bad it was. They thought they were going to have to amputate this guy’s leg. They don’t have to, but they said that they’re trying to… They’re still looking at… I mean… Yeah, we had the guy who got killed by a bear yesterday for mowing his grass. I’ve never heard of a guy getting the flesh-eating bacteria thing from mowing grass, though. But I guess that makes sense if you’re near a ditch and there’s water. I don’t know. man that’s like really this guy runs an irrigation company he said he’s trying he’s recovering uh but um yeah that’s awful his injuries look bad that’s a weird one definitely a weird one uh let’s see uh in florida let’s see what do we got another florida woman she attacked her mother and brother during an argument over the playstation playstation 4. Yeah. Marion County. Now, this was like a year ago, but it occurred in April 24. But they’re in trial now. She was found guilty just this week of choking her mother and then hitting her brother during an argument over a video game console. So it was over the PlayStation. That’s insane. She apparently grabbed his her brother’s groin to the point of pain because I guess they were fighting over the plane. She’s actually a grown person. Can I just say like these are all grown people like this woman’s literally she’s in her late 20s. And or sorry, she looks like she’s in early 20s. She’s 21 years old, but she choked her mother. She battered the brother and police had to come. And they said that it was over a PlayStation 4 console and they were fighting over it, et cetera, et cetera. So that’s ended. That’s that’s what happened. That’s wow. I can’t imagine being so ridiculous that that’s your pretty wild. I also have this this guy. I think we’ve had this before. Did we ever, did we talk about the guy who’s dressed as Chuck E. Cheese in Arrested? Oh, wait, yeah, we did. Okay. We did, yeah. I have a lot of Florida people that still send me, sometimes people will send me stuff that I’ve already talked about. But for whatever reason, I got this like three, this like sent like three or four times over the past couple of days. I’m like, I’m pretty sure we covered the Chuck E. Cheese arrest. Like literally the guy in the costume. Kel-Tec, the KS7 Gen 2 shotgun, one of the somewhat new ones that Kel-Tec has come out with based in Florida. Family-owned company. The KS7 Gen 2 pack with upgrades. You got a five-slot Picatinny-style rail. Underneath, you can add vertical grips, lights, keep it flush and sleek with a cap, however you want to do it. It’s a smooth pump-action shotgun, smoother and for faster, cleaner cycling, plus enhanced durability. Ultra-lightweight at just under 7 pounds unloaded. Compact bullpup design, so you have maneuverability in tight spaces, ambidextrous downward shell ejection, and a 7 plus 1 capacity as well. And you can also get the KS7 Gen 2 Defender Package. See more of those details on keltecweapons.com for all of those specs. And its MSRP is only $639, so it’s affordable, bringing advanced performance well within reach. It’s from Keltec, K-E-L-T-E-C weapons.com. It’s the KS7… Gen 2 from Kel-Tec Weapons and based in Florida. Keltecweapons.com. Tell them Dana sent you.
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SPEAKER 02 :
Israeli hostages are released and the war stops in Gaza, but the people who screamed about ending genocide are suddenly silent. Biden administration figures call the Middle East deal bittersweet because they think they deserve the credit. And the shutdown fight highlights what a complete disaster Obamacare is, just like we said it would be. I’m Greg Karambas, inviting you to join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday for the Three Martini Lunch podcast. We’ll give you the top news, some good laughs, and we’ll be done in less than 30 minutes. Follow the Three Martini Lunch on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
SPEAKER 03 :
But we went and visited a church. And I’m going to warn you. I’m very old school about certain things. Certain things in church. I get very to the letter of Paul on a lot of things. And some of you know where I’m going on this. And I don’t really care if somebody gets offended or not because your problem’s not with me. It’s with the word. It’s with God. So, you know, take it up with him. That’s between y’all. But I’ll say this. We have been visiting some churches recently. To find a church home. And I don’t mean like shopping. I want a Bible-believing church. I want a church that is full of the Spirit, preaching from the Bible. We are Church of Christ. We’re non-denominational. So that’s where we’d like to stay. Well, we went and visited a church this weekend. And it was a church. I’m not going to say any. I’m not going to name-check anybody. But we went and visited this church. And it was someone that we used to go to church with that had recommended it. We get there. It’s a beautiful campus. I mean, it’s it’s very new. It’s a beautiful campus. They you know, they had a water fountain. They had all kinds of stuff. Can it was fancy inside. It smelled like a retail store. Like, I think. they maybe had some kind of like scent that they were pumping through the HVAC. It smelled amazing and they’re clean like soap. It was so nice. I don’t know why that struck me. It was a little loud. The sound was loud. We come from a faith that or a practice. I don’t want to say a faith where, you know, church or Christ. So we come from a place where we don’t have a lot of the instrumentation because it’s, you know, lift your voices up and you’re active in the worship. I do get weird when there’s like a wall of instrumentation. That’s so loud. You can’t even talk to the person next to you and you feel like you’re at a concert. I just got, I have some issues with that, but anyway, it’s a minor thing. We’re in there and they had a great worship and pray service and they were singing some old school songs that I remember when I was a kid. And we’re getting ready to settle in and a woman comes up and she’s talking about stuff. And I was assuming that this was going to be a female who is coming up and is talking to us about maybe, I don’t know, VBS or maybe some of the women’s groups or something. And she kept going. And then she started in scripture and I realized, oh my gosh, she’s giving the sermon. Cain’s eyebrows just shot up over his Robert Evans glasses. She starts, she was giving the sermon and I sat there because I, I think that you either take some of the word or none of the word or all of the word or none of the word. You can’t just like parse it out and take, I’ll just have a little bit of this word. I’ll have a little bit of this. You either take all of it or none of it. And I don’t support women pastors. I am very – again, if you take issue with me on this, then argue about it with God in Paul’s letters. Argue about it in the New Testament. I’m not going to – there is Deborah, there is Ruth, and I think that Christianity has done more than any other faith. Jesus was the first feminist. I use that word like almost kind of jokingly. the true equalizer and Christianity has done more to lift up women than any other faith and has, has done so much for women. This women are called to certain things. Men are called to certain things. And I’m not going to argue about it because it’s just a, just it, it is the word is what the word is. And I’m sitting there and there’s a woman pastor. You and I were raised very similarly. And I’m, It just shocked me. And then she was giving a sermon on gossip and biblical law. And she kind of was participating in gossip while also giving the sermon about gossip. And I’m thinking, this is wow. This is all of we got up and walked out of the service. Now we had some family visiting with us. We were very quiet, but unfortunately I did not know that they were going to, you know, you’re visiting a church. I didn’t advance and make sure, Hey, you don’t gotta want, you know, I just didn’t think that was something I necessarily needed to do if it was a Bible believing church. And I was very shocked. We left in the middle of the sermon because I’m just not going to, I’m not going to sit there and listen to it. And it was so sad because there were so many young people there and they look like they had a great youth program and And I just was just, that’s a big thing to get incorrect, I think. And there’s always going to be something incorrect or something off. I’m not looking for the perfect church. I’m looking for a church that is in the word. And I’m looking for a church that is of the spirit and that has a heart for God and is not about trying to be of the world and meet the world in the world. You know what I mean? Be of the word, not the world. And I felt… Like this was just more of that. Church is where you are. That’s where you go and you fellowship with believers and you are stepping out of all of the insanity of this world and you’re getting back to the purpose. I don’t want to see it portrayed on stage as part of a sermon. It’s not social experimentation. It’s if the Bible I just I was so frustrated because I thought, you know, I was really kind of excited. Like when we walked in and I’m like, wow, this is great. And I was livid that it was a female. She was and she wasn’t the regular pastor. And that’s irrelevant. She was still up there and she was delivering a sermon. And I just had a major problem with that. I mean, the Bible’s pretty clear on things, and again, if people want to take issue with it, they can take issue with God. Your beef is not with me. I don’t know. Was that the right thing to do, Cain, to get up and leave?
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I would say so. I mean, everyone has their own convictions, but the reality is there are leaders that lead from a position that everyone would respect, and then there are female pastors. So that’s where I’m at.
SPEAKER 03 :
yeah it it was it just i i was shocked because normally you know you have someone who gets up and they’re like oh yeah on our announcements and the kids you know you know going to kids church or whatever she just stayed up there and then she was at the the podium and then she was getting into scripture and she started talking about gossip and i’m just sitting here processing all of this stuff and i just couldn’t sit there. You know, we, our nephew was with us and he was like, well, I know that, you know, God knows that I know that this is, you know, incompatible with what, you know, his word in, in the gospels. So do I get up and leave? And we were all of the same mind because I was like, nope, this is not, not what I’m, I’m not, I’m not going to exercise patience and wait for you to get some of the most basic things right because our lives are too short. The end. That’s just kind of how I look at it. And I know it’s… There is a problem in the… There’s a problem in the Christian church. And a lot of people are really… They’re trying to water everything down and in the bid to make it seem like, oh, yes, come one, come all. You’re like throwing away some of the word to be of the world. And this is a problem. Our partners that bring you the program, it’s our friends over at All Family Pharmacy. All Family Pharmacy is a great website. This is like your… All medication, everything repository. It really is. Anything that you need, they have at All Family Pharmacy. And All Family Pharmacy not only has your everyday medications, they also have a lot like antibiotics. They have Tamiflu. You can get things in two to four days. You can get them overnighted if you’re in a pinch, which I have done. Not only did I do that when I was getting sick before Thanksgiving and And I was able to get a Z-Pak. But my son, who is at school, was getting strep throat. And before he could get in to see the doctor, I was able to get some all-family pharmacy overnighted to him, some amoxicillin. And then it’s funny because when he went in to the doctor, they prescribed him the same thing that we’d ordered from all-family pharmacy. So you fill it out, the doctor reviews it, and then they send you your medications. They have ivermectin and hydroxychloroquine and membendazole and NAD+, everything that you need. You don’t need any gatekeepers. All Family Pharmacy makes it accessible just to you. And it’s so easy. You can get 10% off right now when you go through allfamilypharmacy.com slash Dana and use code Dana10. So don’t wait. Visit allfamilypharmacy.com slash Dana. Code Dana10 for 10% off.
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SPEAKER 09 :
If you like true crime, you’ll love the Miracle Files podcast.
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We share real stories with the suspense of true crime, but we’ll leave you with a sense of light and hope.
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Like the college wrestler who fought a grizzly, the woman who was dead for nearly an hour, or the child lost in a dark mine for days. These are the kind of stories that remind us miracles are real.
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Subscribe to the Miracle Files wherever you get your podcasts and join us on this thrilling journey of faith and miracles.
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And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
SPEAKER 03 :
Mitch McConnell fell down. He fell down inside of the Senate. He was helped to his feet by an aide and a Capitol Police officer, and he waved briefly at the camera before walking away without any assistance. He’s 83 years old. He was asked a question by a reporter at the time when he lost his footing inside of the basement of the Russell Senate office building just a little earlier. He needs to just retire and relax and enjoy his life. because I can’t imagine people living out the latter part of their lives in elected office. That just sounds like a hell on earth that no one wants to be a part of, you know? Just awful. A Marshall’s shopper stabbed a customer in front of her family over a checkout line dispute, according to New Jersey cops. This is crazy. People are nuts. I’m telling you, the violence is real. A woman was upset at a customer because apparently they were taking too long, I guess, at the checkout. And she was just apparently getting very testy over it. And the victim, she stabbed the victim multiple times in front of her family. She apparently was buying kitchen knives from the store and used one of the kitchen knives to stab the shopper. It was like 6 o’clock on a Saturday. And it was Amber Thompson, 25, in Newark, got into an argument with another customer over the speed of the checkout lane. As the victim and her family left the store and headed towards the car, Thompson allegedly purchased a set of kitchen knives, removed one from the box, took one out of the box, and then followed the victim in the parking lot and stabbed her multiple times. She was taken to a nearby hospital with injuries that thankfully were not life-sustaining. Thompson was located in the Marshall’s bathroom with a kitchen knife laying atop the baby changing station. She is charged with second degree aggravated assault, third and fourth degree weapons offenses, fourth degree endangerment. Wow. Yeah, how is that not attempted murder? I agree with you. A Disney World guest apparently committed suicide at a resort hotel. Ooh, haunted Disney? I’m just saying, this is horrible. Wednesday, someone was found dead due to apparent suicide at their contemporary resort hotel. They said the manner of death was ruled a suicide, and it was apparently near the resort hotel, just outside of the… magic kingdom park and they said it was an apparent suicide so that’s super sad and a volvo a woman sees volvo after her dog triggers the trunk to close causing her brain injury it’s not volvo’s fault it’s your fault like sands through the hourglass so are the days of the united states
SPEAKER 11 :
saw your voicing Professor Umbridge in the new Harry Potter audiobooks. I was wondering, are you aware that some fans are calling for a boycott, giving J.K.
SPEAKER 08 :
Rowling’s ongoing campaign against trans people? I was not aware of that, no. I’m very sorry. You know, I think we’re all living in a period of time right now where we’re all going to have to figure out how to live together, aren’t we? And we’ve all got very different opinions. So I hope that we can all… find respect.
SPEAKER 03 :
What’s the problem with what she said? People are getting upset with Keira Knightley for some reason. I think she’s lovely. And that’s a stupid question to ask. But she was being very nice about it. She’s doing the voice of Dolores Umbridge in the audiobook of Rowling’s book series. So James McAvoy, Kit Harington, Simon Pegg, Matt Berry, who’s very good. And I think people are trying to get there again these people wake up they’re so miserable these people live such miserable lives they take joy and being miserable to everybody and they’re just trying to find someone that they can get upset with and they’re picking now they’re trying to pick her And so she was doing this interview with this. I’m not just cider, this lame publication. And they are asking her this question. And, you know, she kind of laughs about it. And they’re saying, oh, she laughed. Can you believe she laughed? And can you believe she said she didn’t know? Because she’s not a loser like you people. She doesn’t sit around here and do burn book mean girl style and figure out who’s fighting with who. And quite honestly, these people are getting upset over J.K. Rowling. Shut the hell up. No one cares about your stupid opinions. OK, you have not even contributed one artistic anything remotely offensive. close to the level of artistry that she has given to the arts and entertainment community. These people are mad. They’re trying to force compliance with their cosplay. If they were truly happy, they would just live their lives content with how they view themselves. But that’s not enough because their problem is inward, not outward. They want to force all of you, everyone else to affirm their cosplay. And if you don’t, you, not they insanely in their view are the bigot. It’s insane. These are actions of insane people. Make mental institutions great again. And to go after her for it, I thought she handled that idiotic question wonderfully. I would not have been as nice. She handled it very nicely, I thought. She was very calm and chill, and she was very respectful with her opinions. How can you get mad over saying, well, we all have different opinions, so I hope that we can all find respect? Well, I’m mad. That’s what these people are saying. They’re mad at her for saying that everyone has opinions and that we should all be respectful of people’s opinions, which I don’t think you should be, but I even think she’s too nice there. If your opinion’s stupid, I have no respect for it. No one is owed respect for an opinion. You aren’t owed respect. At most, you are owed indifference. That is it. You’re not owed anything else but indifference. So she’s even very nice there. But as Juan correctly notes, they want her to pick a side. What team are you on? They want her to put the jersey on what team they’re trying to determine. See, they’re sniffing you out like some jackbooted thugs. They’re sniffing you out. That’s what she’s not. She’s removing herself from that. She’s not playing that. I always find it interesting. You have some lowly reporter who probably eats cat food and can’t make ends meet because they decided they wanted to major and get a job in a completely unrealistic dying industry. And so they ask someone who is infinitely more talented and more successful a stupid question like this. And that is a way to elevate their own profile and maybe gain wider acceptance and larger and more ascended professional circles. They decide to stoke a witch hunt like this. It’s stupid. So good on her for giving not really, but rhetorically kind of a middle finger to this.
SPEAKER 04 :
Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
SPEAKER 11 :
Listen as students and young adults interview well-respected CEOs on our national radio show, realworldleaders.org, to learn secrets for success and how to use them to propel their careers.
SPEAKER 10 :
This was super interesting, and especially to see that everything can lead to something else, like how cooking led you to be, you know, the founder, the president of a business, and even like your activities in high school, middle school, like led to this moment.
SPEAKER 06 :
Adeline, what are you looking to do with the rest of your life? Do you have a sense of that?
SPEAKER 10 :
No, not really, but I’m exploring a lot of interests right now and I enjoy music and languages. So I think maybe something in that area.
SPEAKER 02 :
Brett, somebody that’s interested in languages and music, you think there’s any hope for them?
SPEAKER 04 :
Oh my gosh. I mean, in our world today, everybody speaks different languages and they work with people that speak different languages, have different cultures. That’s great.
SPEAKER 11 :
To hear more and to help us introduce your high school, GED, work-ready and college students to our CEOs, visit our website at realworldleaders.org. That’s realworldleaders.org.
