In this episode of The Dana Show, Craig Collins takes listeners on a whirlwind tour of bizarre happenings in the Sunshine State, covering everything from strange Florida man escapades to peculiar political maneuvers. Discover how everyday decisions become newsworthy adventures and explore the layered complexities in political debates, all delivered with humor and a keen analytical edge. Don’t miss this engaging journey through news that ranges from the light-hearted to the profoundly odd.
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Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.
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It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
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That’s right. It’s time for Florida Man on the Dana Show. D-Lash, Dana Lash Radio and X on Twitter. Great ways to stay connected to her. My name is Craig Collins filling in. Thrilled to be with you. Radio Craig C. If you want to follow me and what I occasionally say about the New York Yankees, that’s totally fine. I get in on that, too. Several different Florida Man stories, some of them amazing. This one horrific, but also ridiculously Florida. A couple in Florida is facing charges after they left their 16-year-old son on the side of the road. They said they didn’t want him anymore. At 16 years old, some parents might start to get frustrated with the young man, son especially, but I don’t know, any teenager might be annoying. The right approach is not to leave them on the side of the road and try to drive away. That’s not going to work out. Uniquely Florida about this story, they left him with a wad of cash and a bag of handguns. They’re like, here you go, son. You’re 16. You’re an adult, according to us in Florida. So here’s a wad of cash. And here’s just a bag of an assortment of handguns. We don’t know why you need so many. And in such a random thing, like not even in a box, man, like at least put them in a little safe or something. But now they just have them all in a bag and they’re handing them to this guy. I have audio of Josh Taylor, who’s the chief of staff for the North Port Police Department, talking about the ridiculousness of this story.
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The story was these people kicked him out of the car and gave him two bags. And once, through the course of that investigation, talking with him, we were able to figure out what was in those bags. There was the loaded weapons, and I believe there was a magazine as well. The report indicates that the child was handed these bags and said, you’re the chosen one, good luck. So that’s all.
SPEAKER 06 :
I got to be honest, a part of me would be a little bit motivated if someone handed me a bag of handguns and said I was the chosen one. But that’s probably the wrong thing to take from this. And I’m a gun guy. I’m definitely very happy with the guns that I have right now. Of course, I don’t think you could fill in on this show and not be a pro-gun person because Dana is so prolifically awesome in her own discussion and opinion of guns in her history and understanding the very important value of the Second Amendment. But no, teenager, side of the road, bag of handguns, probably not a good move. Uniquely Florida, though. A Florida man robbed $7,000 worth of lottery scratch-off tickets from a convenience store. So he goes in, he demands the scratchers, he leaves. Now, two things he did were wrong. The first one is he didn’t know how to play scratcher tickets the pro way, which you don’t scratch any of them. You just find your local grocery store or something and you scan them. That way you don’t have to do anything other than scan to see if you won. He didn’t do that part. He actually played all $7,000 of these tickets. Then he tried to bring the winning tickets back to the same convenience store that he stole them from. That’s uniquely Florida. That’s like, hey, bygones be bygones. Today’s a new day. What I did yesterday doesn’t count anymore. I’m here to, you know, take my sweet winnings from the stuff I stole from you the other day. That gets you arrested. That’s usually not a good move. Another Florida man that made the news was naked and chasing Walmart workers inside a Walmart and in the parking lot of a Walmart. He was then found later in the wooded area near the Walmart, agitated and paranoid. Every part of that story 100% checks out in the world of Florida. First thing first, you show up at a Walmart and there’s a naked guy. You probably think to yourself, man, there’s a lot of other Walmarts. that I can go to. I don’t know why I’m staying here. But if you’re the employees, you’re stuck dealing with it, calling the authorities. The naked dude is harassing people. I don’t know if any of it was sexual in nature or if the naked thing is just an accident. That’s always a confusion of mine. I always want to ask the criminal, and it’s probably not the right way to go about it, but I can’t help it. When nudity got into the equation for them, like the person who’s arrested on the side of the road, traffic ticket, and then all of a sudden they’re naked. Like, when did they decide that they were taking their clothes off? Was it an in the moment thing? I was this a premeditated nakedness that came about from like, you know, planning. If I ever get pulled over, I know it’ll make the situation go away. I’ll just get naked. But that feels like a byproduct and a question because I don’t think in my own life I will ever be, you know, naked accidentally. I’m pretty sure I won’t ever be naked accidentally. And in a situation like this. We’re like, when you’re arrested, you kind of want them to ignore it. You’re like, and sir, you’re naked. You’re like, why does that matter? Why can’t I be naked all the time? That’s how these people seem to behave. And that is a problem. And then finally, one last Florida man story. A Florida guy stole a woman’s purse. He found out that she had a one-month-old kitten inside the purse instead of any valuable stuff, which is just a weird thing to do. It’s not a purse puppy. Dogs are better than cats, by the way, even if this kitten was probably adorable at one month. But you open up the purse, you’ve stolen the thing, and then you wind up, you have a brand new pet. That’s a unique way for, say, adoption centers to try to get more of their pets adopted. Just put them in purses and leave them out on the side of the road and see if people say that doesn’t sound right. Don’t do that. Don’t write your hate letters to me. Please, PETA, don’t say anything to us. I’m kidding. But anyway, maybe it’s a nice adoption thing. Put the puppy in the purse, hold the purse out and be like, look, you get a dog in a purse. And maybe that way we get more pets adopted. That’s fine with me. And apparently a thing in Florida. All right. Well, sort of. Quick break. A lot more. Greg Collins filling in on the Dana Show.
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More young lefties are embracing communism and actually believe it’s never really been tried. Joy Reid exposes the right’s dastardly secret that it wants less taxes and regulation. And a few weeks after insisting he will never drop out, New York City Mayor Eric Adams drops out. I’m Greg Karumbas, inviting you to join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday for the Three Martini Lunch podcast. We’ll give you the top news, some good laughs, and we’ll be done in less than 30 minutes. Follow the Three Martini Lunch on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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This is The Dana Show. My name is Craig Collins filling in. Thrilled to be with you. DLash, DanaLashRadio and X on Twitter. Great ways to stay connected to her and everything’s going on in the world of Dana. And she will be back on Monday. Let’s do this. A few things. So first, Speaker Mike Johnson was furious that it’s very likely that Democrats are trying to hold out in any sort of government shutdown until No Kings Day, which is a Antifa protest day, October 18th, in which a rally is supposed to happen in New York City or excuse me, in Washington, D.C., as well as New York City and other places where they protest no kings, which we don’t have. By the way, we successfully already have no kings. You can all just go home. It’s totally fine. But here’s Mike Johnson saying that the belief is the Democrats are just waiting to keep the government shut down until that day because they like the optics of the government being shut down during no king’s day, which is part of the reason that so many people hate politicians and hate the political system is this is easily believable. as a thing that Democrats could be doing just because they want to say out loud, even though it’s their fault, that it’s horrible that Trump is doing whatever they blame Trump for doing. Here we go.
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A very patient guy, but I have had it with these people. They’re playing games with real people’s lives. The theory we have right now, they have a hate America rally that’s scheduled for October 18th on the National Mall. It’s all the pro Hamas wing and the you know, the the Antifa people, they’re all coming out. Some of the House Democrats are selling T-shirts for the event. And it’s it’s it’s being told to us that they won’t be able to reopen the government until after that rally because they can’t face their rabid base. I mean, this is this is serious business hurting real people. Yeah. And I just I’m beyond words. I can’t believe they’re actually doing this.
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So two things I want to say in reaction to this. First, and I’m owning this and you don’t care. I don’t know why I’m even holding my feet to the fire because no one who listens to shows like this where I’m just a fill-in guy even remembers probably what I say. But when Republicans threaten to shut the government down, my reaction is often go ahead. I don’t care. It’s not going to impact my life all that much. It’ll reopen in a certain amount of weeks after it shuts down. The only thing I ever care about is military men and women getting a paycheck still, which doesn’t happen, even if the left will claim it does. You actually have to pass certain laws to make sure that the military individuals keep getting paid. It’s ridiculous that the politicians get paid if they shut the government down. They don’t actually get their checks stopped, but the military individuals who are serving our country do. That’s insane. That’s the only thing I ever really care about. Other than that, shut the government down. Who cares? In all honesty, use it as a catalyst to fire a bunch of people we don’t need and clean up the bureaucracy that is our federal government. And I’d be thrilled. So when that is the stance, if it’s Republicans in charge, I keep the same stance when Democrats are in charge, even as Mike Johnson says that people are actually being hurt because how much they care about those people seems to ebb and flow with what side of the aisle they’re on. But as I say that, there are aspects to this. that I do think are interesting because of what you’re selling more so than what you’re doing. And what I mean by that is Democrats often sell that they’re the party that cares more. I’m probably going to be a broken record about this today because so many stories feel like they lean into this narrative. Democrats tell you they’re the good guys. They embolden their supporters to feel as though that they’re good people and the people that they disagree with vehemently and maybe violently on the right are actually bad, horrible people. They’re sexists and racists and, you know, everything else is. And they’re they’re the worst kind of individuals that exist in the bucket of deplorables, a version of a thing. And so they empower their side of the aisle to feel this way. And then when they play these political games and hurt the lives of people that they claim they care about, that hypocrisy does matter. Even if I don’t say that to me, I’m as worried about the government being turned on tomorrow when it’s turned off today. And that came out weird. I think I probably should have phrased that differently. But nonetheless, like it doesn’t really impact my life. It probably won’t impact your life that much unless you work for them directly. But nonetheless, like I think that that is interesting that what they’re selling becomes so obviously untrue.
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And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
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Let’s do a quick five on the Dana Show. DLash, DanaLashRadio, and X on Twitter. Great ways to stay connected to her. My name is Craig Collins. Radio Craig C. If you want to see me be sad about the Yankees being terrible this year, although now I won’t tweet about them for several months. All right. Amazon’s MGM will release the Melania Trump documentary. This was before the big news that she ushered in a deal with Vladimir Putin that will reunite children that are displaced in Ukraine because of the war there. This documentary had nothing to do with that. It was the lead up to Trump actually being inaugurated as the president of the United States after he was almost assassinated and killed. And I don’t know why I said and killed. Assassinated means killed. But turned his head and miraculously survived. A unique story about a woman who is married to someone who, you know, miraculously is alive today. And yet a lot of people will hate the fact that it exists. MGM will be putting that out in January, I think for a couple days in theaters at least. We’ll see how successful it is, we’ll see how much people talk about it, but interesting nonetheless, and of course crapped on by mainstream media. Amel Gibson’s Passion of the Christ has a sequel that’s coming out. I am a Catholic, I am a Christian, of course. I think it’s weird that the Passion of the Christ has a sequel, even if it’s called The Resurrection of the Christ, and that story is interesting. That’s a good story to tell in a movie theater somewhere. It’s just odd. This has been a long-sitting, gestating potential movie that eventually will actually happen. It’s going to have an all-new cast. They’re recasting all the roles. I guess Jim Caviezel didn’t want to play Jesus again, or I don’t know what happened there. But nonetheless, just odd. Hollywood makes a lot of sequels. The Passion of the Christ is one of those movies that you didn’t necessarily think would have a sequel coming out about it. I’m saying this as respectfully as I can, again, because I’m a Catholic person. I’m not making fun of it. I just think it’s odd as a news story. All right. Other things out there. Area 51 crash mystery deepens as the FBI has joined investigations into tampering into the site. For anything you say that isn’t happening that you don’t want or that you don’t like in the world of the FBI, like we didn’t get enough information here or there. More alien stuff I’m always fine with. I don’t think it’s a distraction. People often say that Area 51 and alien stuff comes out when they want to distract you and push you away from some other story that you might pay attention to that is more valuable or more pressing in our society today. I can do both. I think that you can do both. I think we can all do both. I think when it comes to aliens and aliens specifically, I can pay attention to what the right hand is doing while also paying attention to what the left hand is doing. That is my promise to you. And that is my promise to anyone out there that we can all do this together. And then finally, one last quick story. Political bumper stickers are making people angrier in traffic instances. I guess road rage is going off the charts. If someone does something stupid in a vehicle and they have a giant Harris Walls bumper sticker, the odds of you getting mad go up. And the same is true for any of those idiots who see the Trump sticker on the back of your car. I just find that funny. I don’t think that’s as bad of a thing as people say it is. And if your car is plastered with political bumper stickers, I think you kind of understand that you might be making some people mad every single day all the time. And you don’t seem to care if someone gets into a fit of additional road rage because you cut them off like a moron and you have a ton of stickers all over the back of your car. I think that’s kind of a non-you thing, more so an on-them thing. Freedom of speech and everything, but you’re asking for trouble, I believe, in that situation, so I’m not surprised it happens. All right, quick break. A lot more. Craig Collins filling in on The Dana Show. This is The Dana Show. My name is Craig Collins filling in. Thrilled to be with you. A whole lot of stuff out there to talk about. DLash, DanaLashRadio and X on Twitter. Great ways to stay connected. This is a Democratic politician doing terrible in a debate, which we’ve seen time and again. But this is uniquely awesome, especially considering one of the people she’s trying to stand with. Seems to be a person who’s unapologetically totally fine with political violence. But let’s play some audio and then we’ll break this down a little bit more. But once again, Democratic politicians swinging a mess in the world of back and forth debate. And even a moderator who was being called like a far right individual who definitely was not that going back and forth with these politicians. Just asking very basic, simple questions that the left leaning politician had no ability to answer.
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Thank you, Ms. Spanberger. I just I didn’t hear an answer there on the endorsement issue. So I want to make sure. Will you continue to endorse Jay Jones to be the next attorney general of Virginia? And were you aware of these text messages before they released? You have 30 seconds.
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In fact, it appears that it was those who released the text messages and held them for years. So the public was unaware who had knowledge of these text messages. What did you do about it? I learned of these text messages the day that they came out.
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Okay, look. I got to tell you something, and I got to be as honest as possible as I can in this and shoot the messenger if you want to. I’m a white guy about to be 40 at the end of this month. Literally on Halloween, I turned 40 years old. This white female politician, Spanberger, is running against a black female politician. The black female is the Republican. The white female is the Democrat. I might surprise some people with how that goes, but I love the attitude. That comes out of the opponent as she’s saying, when did you know and what did you do? I want to play that part again because it’s so good. And it’s the kind of thing that you might attribute to, you know, a certain race, a certain attitude, a certain way of speaking, any of that stuff. The left would also celebrate if it was someone on their side of the aisle interjecting like this in this way. Of course, they said that this politician was rude. How dare she try to say and do things the way that if it’s a Democrat who is of the same, you know, racial or I guess the same sex, they might celebrate the version of I don’t understand what’s going on here. They used to call Kamala Harris Mamala and they used to pretend as though her confusion with Donald Trump and her willingness to show it was a great expression of who she is and something to be celebrated. Wonder why it doesn’t happen here.
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In fact, it appears that it was those who released the text messages and held them for years. So the public was unaware who had knowledge of these text messages for many hours. What did you do about it? I learned of these text messages the day that they came out, and I denounced them as soon as I learned of them. She denounces murder. And importantly— At this point, as we move forward, the voters now have this information, information that was withheld for them, presumably for political reasons. But the voters now have the information.
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By the way, the moderator is also a black woman. So she’s pushing back on Winsome Earl Sayers and the things that she is saying. I don’t know if I guess the race card won’t be played by anybody because of the makeup of the individuals on the stage. But I just I love this. And I think this is the kind of thing that if it were, you know, reversed parties the way we’re expected, and it’s a black female Democrat objecting to a white Republican woman or man in this way, I think that most media would be so thrilled with how this went down. They are not thrilled in how this went down because of how ridiculous it is. But the answer, by the way, is atrocious.
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It is up to voters to make an individual choice based on this information.
SPEAKER 09 :
Mr. Member, I understand what you’re saying about the voters, but for you, do you still continue to endorse Jay Jones?
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, we we asked you about you. We want you to give us an opinion. We don’t want you to explain how the political system works in its most basic sense, as if that’s an answer to this question. Are you still throwing your support behind someone who seems to be very happy with and even celebrating political violence just weeks after Charlie Kirk is murdered?
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15 seconds. Go ahead. We are all running our individual races. I believe my opponent has said that about her lieutenant governor nominee. And it’s up to every person to make their own decision. I am running my race to serve Virginia.
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What is your decision?
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What do you think?
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And that is what I intend to do. Thank you, Ms. Spanberger. We just want to clarify, you know, what you’re saying is that as of now, you still endorse Jay Jones as attorney general.
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I’m saying as of now, it’s up to every voter to make their own individual decision. I am running for governor. I am accountable for the words that I say.
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I love it so much. We just want one moment. You know what would be funny? It would be funny to force these politicians to have to behave like this with an obvious question. And I don’t mean one about politics. I mean, like, make a video where politicians are standing in line at an ice cream store. And one after another are being asked what flavor of ice cream they want. And they have to answer that question the same way they answer their political questions today. So Abigail Spanberger would be saying, look, it’s up to everyone else inside this ice cream shop, what ice cream flavor they want, what they’re going to buy when it’s their turn to purchase. And then someone would look at this insane human and be like, yeah, but what do you want? What flavor do you want? You know, it’s not my choice. It’s everybody else’s choice. It’s just insane. And the only way that they get away with this sort of stuff is because in politics, these rules have applied for forever. But you should. You should apply whatever the version of back and forth question is to something that doesn’t matter. Like pretend it’s your wife asking you if you mowed the lawn, which is something that happens to me on occasion if the lawn has not been mowed. And it is definitely one of my jobs. And I’ll never let her do it. As a man, I feel uniquely horrible if I look outside and see the missus mowing the lawn. I think that Nate Bargetzi makes a joke about that. And I don’t know why that is, but it’s been my job since I was a little kid. My mom made me lawnmow boy, and I’ve been lawnmow boy ever since. That also felt weird to say in those terms. But nonetheless, if that happened, and I had the unfortunate situation of having to deal with an Abigail Spanberger in that situation, the answer to is the lawn mowed would be like, well, other lawns in the area have been mowed based on the decision-making of the people inside those homes. And if they did or didn’t mow the lawn, that was their decision. Yeah, but is your lawn mowed? You know what? I’m going to plead the fifth here.
SPEAKER 05 :
Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Absurd Truth: Debate TAKEDOWN
In this episode of The Dana Show, Craig Collins takes listeners on a whirlwind tour of bizarre happenings in the Sunshine State, covering everything from strange Florida man escapades to peculiar political maneuvers. Discover how everyday decisions become newsworthy adventures and explore the layered complexities in political debates, all delivered with humor and a keen analytical edge. Don’t miss this engaging journey through news that ranges from the light-hearted to the profoundly odd.
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