SPEAKER 02 : 0:00

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SPEAKER 01 : 1:00

Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Caltech.

SPEAKER 11 : 1:06

It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.

SPEAKER 05 : 1:15

So I’m trying to understand. So this is an NBC2 local affiliate out there in Florida. A Cape Coral man was arrested after he claimed that his house was poisoned and attempted to break into another house. How do you poison a house? The victim was seen trying to open a lock sliding door on the back of the home. The victim said he confronted the guy, told him that he was armed. And that’s when the intruder ran away from the scene before officers arrived. The guy, Antonio Cruz Aparicio, he was attempting to gain entry into a home. He was yelling for help, saying his house was poisoned. They actually had a tasing to get him under control. And they found his wallet at a separate residence. So He got charged – a couple charges, burglary, resisting with violence. Yeah, that’s kind of freaky. Just – I didn’t even – I mean obviously they probably did a mental health check on him. This – let’s see. Oh, I got a couple of other ones. This is a Florida woman was arrested after she accidentally texted a sheriff’s department instead of her drug dealer. That can happen, I’m sure, to people like Octavia Wells, 41 years old. She sent a text message trying to get fentanyl before leaving town. Apparently, though, she accidentally texted a narcotics investigator within the sheriff’s office and, oh boy, the investigator adeptly engaged her in conversation, masquerading as her drug dealer, arranged to meet with her. She went to the gas station thinking she was meeting her drug dealer, and instead she was met with a team of investigators, and she was taken into custody because they charged with a whole bunch of stuff. And I don’t know if buying with the intent to distribute was part of it, but I don’t know. This, let’s see, there’s a Lee County man that got in trouble for slashing tires following a road rage incident. 37-year-old Matthew Tobler. He was slashing tires of a vehicle, according to Lee County Sheriff’s Office, and he was making obscene gestures, hand gestures at nearby motorists. And when… A victim said that he… Why would you approach the vehicle? There was an incident. A victim approached Tobler’s vehicle. He got out of the car, began threatening him with a knife, and then started slashing his tires before leaving the scene. So they were able to take… I mean, what the hell is wrong with… I’m going to tell you what. People can’t drive. That is for sure. I’ve got some stories. I actually have a story that happened to me over Christmas that I’ll share when I’m able to share it. But yeah, people cannot drive. And let’s see. And Saudi Arabia is pressing a Floridian. Well, a man in Florida to give up his U.S. citizenship over critical tweets. It’s a Florida retiree. He made social media posts critical of the crown prince. And apparently Saudi Arabia doesn’t have the same kind of, you know, speech. Interesting. This is going to make your life easier. And if you, you know, dislike big pharma and you dislike the Rube Goldberg machine, that is our health care system. All family pharma is here for you because they believe in medical freedom and empowering you to take charge of your health. So, for instance, when I got sick over Thanksgiving. Right. And I mean, it’s I can’t get into your doctor. And if you know, do you want to go to urgent care and pay like a 200 something dollar copay when you could just literally get in touch with all family pharma dot com slash Dana and use code Dana 10 for 10 percent off your entire order. And then you know what you need. You know that you’re sick. You know what medication works. You still consult with a doctor and they get it sent out to you and they can send it out to you overnight. There’s no red tape. There’s no hassle. It’s all made in the USA. You’re not getting Chinese medicine. OK, you’re not getting CCP meds. And you can get comprehensive treatment options like ivermectin, hydroxychloroquine. They have antibiotics. I got azithromycin because I had a really bad sinus infection and I was sick as a dog. And I got azithromycin overnighted to me. And it just basically made it to where I could still see my family for Thanksgiving. So it was nice. Fast and convenient delivery. Like I said, you can let them know if you need something overnight as well. It is worth it. Visit allfamilypharma.com. and get 10% off with promo code DANA10. There is no other way to get the medicine that you need. Don’t wait for Big Pharma’s next excuse. Protect yourself and your family today. It’s allfamilypharma.com slash DANA and use coupon code DANA10 to save 10%.

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SPEAKER 10 : 6:23

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SPEAKER 05 : 6:55

In L.A., they’ve had over, I don’t know, some people said they’ve personally seen hundreds of homes burned. What were they doing just recently? Audio Summit 11. This is what they were doing. This is how the city was handling stuff. Listen.

SPEAKER 12 : 7:10

I’m super inspired.

SPEAKER 08 : 7:12

She took time out of her already busy schedule to tell us about her vision for the department’s future, one that includes a three-year strategic plan to increase diversity.

SPEAKER 12 : 7:22

People ask me, well, what number are you looking for? I say, I’m not looking for a number. It’s never enough.

SPEAKER 08 : 7:26

Out of 3,300 city firefighters, only 115 are women right now. She’s already looking at ways to change that. She’s quick to point out that doing so has a greater purpose, attracting the best and brightest for the job.

SPEAKER 12 : 7:40

They feel included, they feel valued, and they feel part of a cohesive team.

SPEAKER 08 : 7:44

The chief also checks another box when it comes to inclusivity and diversity at this department. She’s a proud member of the LGBTQ community.

SPEAKER 12 : 7:53

That just kind of opens the door of people that thought, I didn’t even know that that was an opportunity for me.

SPEAKER 05 : 7:58

Oh, man, things that I would rather say right now that I can’t. I mean, you know, they could be focusing on firefighting and stuff, but, you know, it’s California, specifically L.A., We got to make sure that we include people who have sex a certain way in our hiring process. Like, are they, is it like a job for firefighters or are they also hookers? I don’t understand. Yeah. Like how, why does that have any impact on that? Why does that, why is that a consideration on the job? You know, my bosses don’t care that I love cilantro. They don’t care. They wouldn’t care if I dislike cilantro. It’s not a thing, right? It’s just a preference. This idea that this is somehow you have to include this into firefighting, I just don’t understand it. Does it make them fight the fires a better way? Like, does a gay dude fight a fire better than a dude who’s not gay? Like, is how well you fight fires predicated upon how you, you know, get it out privately? Like, I’m curious. Is there something I don’t know? Is there a study?

SPEAKER 11 : 9:22

Yeah, I don’t think even straight people don’t have an advantage over gay people in that regard because that doesn’t matter to your firefighting skills.

SPEAKER 05 : 9:32

I am made of jokes right now. It’s taking everything I have. All of my self-restraint right now.

SPEAKER 11 : 9:38

All of them. The fact that we’re arguing this part of it, to me, is beyond absurd.

SPEAKER 05 : 9:45

I mean, this is stuff they were doing just a few months ago. Yes, it’s very important. I don’t care if the fire chief is alphabet. I don’t care. Can you, I don’t know, fight fires? It’s very important that we get a fire chief who likes tail. It’s very important. And that it’s a chick who likes tail. It’s very important. And this does what concerning the impact of fighting fires? Absolutely nothing. Then why is it an issue? This is what’s so confusing coming from my perspective as someone who was a teenager in the 90s and a young adult going into the early aughts. I was always told, like the rhetoric that we always heard is that what happens behind closed doors is none of your business and stay out of everybody’s private lives. But now it’s like the doors are flung open and they’re having a housewarming party in their bedroom and you’re forced to attend and applaud. That’s what it’s like now. And I just, it’s so hypocritical. And it is completely fair to bring these things up and point this out because the fact that that was like a huge goal for them. Do you know they don’t have enough firefighters? Adam Carolla was just saying what he reiterated the story that he shared a couple of years ago that he had tried to be a firefighter. And they told him that he had to wait. He was on a wait list to be considered because he wasn’t a minority firefighter. We don’t need any of you white dudes fighting fires. Oh, my gosh. This is so it’s just so weird. It’s so weird. I don’t know. I’m just that’s what they focused on. DEI is going to get everybody burnt up. People will burn to death because of DEI. That’s exactly what I just this is just so stupid. So stupid. I was looking at who voted where. So the Palisades… And LA Times had a story where you can go and you can read and see on this map that they have. You go to remove paywall to get around their paywall because I’m not paying them for this stuff. But they were saying that the Palisades, it was pretty close. A lot of them voted for Karen Bass. But barely more of them voted for Rick Caruso. But Karen Bass ended up winning for mayor in LA. So… I mean, and of all the people who are very, very competent, you know, Rick Caruso, billionaire, very successful real estate developer, understands land management, understands all of it. You know, you would think that you would need somebody like that, particularly with wildfires that have been plaguing the area lately. But no, no, they went with Karen Bass, not even in town when all this stuff happens. Remember how the left lost their minds when Ted Cruz went on a previously scheduled spring break trip during ice again a couple of years ago. Karen Bass is legit like at an inauguration in Ghana while her town burns. So shut up. And then Cruz didn’t even go. He canceled his portion and stayed, which is stupid. Yeah. And he’s yeah. So stupid. So I don’t know. Meantime, in Seattle, another city being ravaged by progressivism, who would have thought their $20 per hour minimum wage law is forcing all the restaurants to close? There’s five more restaurants that are closing. They have a law where they demand that you pay someone over $20 an hour, $20.76 an hour. And the hospitality industry came out with a prediction that a ton of small businesses will go under as a direct result of that. And so one of those, Belgado Bakery, they posted a sign in its door. They said that they’re no longer able to service their customers. They’re not able to close that 20% increase in mandated wages and that they’re going to have to close their doors. And they’re just one of tons of other people, tons of other small businesses that are closing because they can’t handle it because it’s stupid. to demand 20 over 20 dollars an hour for this is so stupid and i say this is someone i started as a server i my first job was as a server and i worked uh every friday and saturday night and i made a lot of money in tips and i worked really really hard it’s an entry-level job and i never expected to be paid 20 an hour mandated that’s the stupidest thing i’ve ever heard You’re you’re making the market pay overpay for a lower skill set. And that’s it is people can get upset about it. But I mean, come on. This is dumb. This is how you get $70 hamburgers. Is this kind of stuff right here? Because people then bitch and moan about capitalism. They don’t they don’t account their cost into the capitalism when you are forcing businesses. And why stop at $20? When you’re forcing businesses to pay, where do you think that cost is coming from? The business doesn’t exist just to tickle your jimmies. They don’t exist just to, you know, make you happy. It’s a business. They’re going to pass the cost on. And why stop? Like I said, why stop at $20, an increase in $20? Why don’t you give them $50,000 an hour if you really love the poor? If you love the poor so much, you’ll give them your salary. Notice how none of those people ever volunteered to do that. It’s killing businesses there. But people voted for it, and they’ll probably continue to vote for it. It’s all the rich progressives that can afford all the stupidity. Our partners who help bring you the program, it’s our friends over at Kel-Tec. Kel-Tec, the makers, oh, they invented the micro-compact pistol category. They invented all of that. They’re unveiling some new stuff over at SHOT Show as well, which is going to be later this month. That’s a private industry event. But they have, you know, whether it’s the P-15, whether it’s the P-11, the P-32, I mean, they’ve really changed the way people conceal carry. And they have… You know, an entirely new category of high performance KSG shotguns as well. The fold and have carbine family, the sub two K’s, all kinds of awesome stuff that they’ve come out with. And they’re going to come out with something new later towards the end of this month. And we’ll we’ll have it. You can also visit Caltech weapons dot com slash Dana and sign up for that Caltech insider e-newsletter. And I see all their social media posts, et cetera. And that’s where you can get updates on the latest innovation performance. Caltech Caltech weapons dot com slash Dana.

SPEAKER 04 : 16:43

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SPEAKER 07 : 17:14

Look, politics are stressful right now, but there are much better ways for conservatives to spend their time than to see what mood Joe Manchin might be in for a given vote or which special interest group on the left will steamroll Joe Biden today. I’m Greg Karumbas. Join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday for the Three Martini Lunch podcast. And we’ll give you the day’s good, bad and crazy news for conservatives with some much needed laughs on the side. So please join us. Subscribe at Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts.

SPEAKER 11 : 17:43

And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.

SPEAKER 05 : 17:48

So this comes from one of our listeners. It’s an Indiana woman. An alleged drunk driver found stuck in the snow. She berated her arresting officers, calling them the devil, and saying they were part of the deep state. Yeah, that’s never a good way to try to argue yourself out of getting… She said she only drank three shots of tequila. Come on. Like, were they double shots? I mean, I feel like, you know, I don’t know if I’m going to trust her on that. I got to say, I got to be honest. I don’t know if I want to trust her on that. AI’s next leap requires intimate access to your digital life. No, thanks. Tech companies are trying to race, trying to upgrade. They’re racing to upgrade chatbots like chat GPT to even take control of a computer to take action on someone’s behalf. I think people need to be really, really careful with this stuff. Just got to say, they said that they’re trying to make it better. And that’s, you know, that’s, that’s the need. It’s a very ambitious goal. I’m telling you, this is going to turn around. It’s going to get out of control and it’s going to, it’s probably already out of control and we just don’t know it. I, you know, it’s, when you read some of the editorials talking about need to contain this stuff and they’re from programmers in these, really well-known engineers that have contributed so much to the advancements that we see in software programming, etc. It’s terrifying when you read some of what these people are saying. A major country has reintroduced strict COVID rules because of another Chinese virus. They said that a number of states are already trying to implement some of this stuff. Chinese government’s trying to manage what they say is the surge in cases. There are a couple of countries where they’re issuing warnings. And some of these, there’s, I think in India they are as well. This is wild to see some of this stuff. I mean, they don’t even know what it is, but here they’re already making the same mistakes that we’ve seen, that we saw what they did during COVID. Outcry is an Arizona tattoo shop tattoos a nine-year-old girl who wanted a picture of Trump on her neck. I mean, I’m not against tattoos. Why are you nine and getting a Trump tattoo on your neck? The artist shared video of the process and he said, do a more patriotic tattoo, maybe a flag on your arm or something. But she said, nope, she wants it on her neck. So that’s apparently she wanted to get it. Apparently they were able to. I guess she did it on her arm instead. She changed her mind. They traveled to Arizona where kids can get tattoos if they have parental permission. But, you know, if you wanted to chop off your willy and be a chick, then you don’t need to tell mom and dad. I mean, that’s how the rule is. So she got just a tattoo on her arm of a flag. She wanted Trump on her neck originally, but she ended up getting the still, though. Come on. That’s a little that’s a little much. Let’s see. A Los Angeles vegan chain abruptly closed all their locations. They got in trouble because they added meat to the menu. I’m looking at their food and it looks gross. It looks like dung and some vegetables. Yeah, they ended up, the Sage restaurant, they ended up having to abruptly shut all their locations.

SPEAKER 09 : 21:16

It’s not my expectation to have any conversation at any point today, but we are looking forward to the dialogue to come in the next few weeks and thereafter to find the common ground necessary in order to get things done for the American people. House Democrats believe that we are not sent to Washington to invade Greenland, Rename the Gulf of Mexico or seize the Panama Canal by force. We were sent to Washington to lower the high cost of living in the United States.

SPEAKER 05 : 22:00

Now you’re concerned about it? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up. Where was this cat at when everyone was like, why are my groceries so expensive? They were acting like it wasn’t a big deal. But now all of a sudden they’re not. They’re no longer going to be in power in a week and a half. So now they’re concerned about the high cost of living? Whatever.

SPEAKER 11 : 22:20

Before November, the economy was great.

SPEAKER 05 : 22:22

Yeah, it was great. What happened? Well, since that time, Trump isn’t even in office yet. He’s not even in office yet. That’s Hakeem Jeffries. Welcome back to the program. Dana Lash with you. I mean, I think I didn’t… I don’t want expansionism. I didn’t vote for expansionism. I voted for America first. And I feel like right now, if it’s not anything that we voted for, it’s not one of the animating issues around which everyone coalesced, then it needs to be kicked to the back of the list right now. However, I do think it’s been funny to watch. I’m torn because I keep thinking, gosh, this is… It’s just like, let’s focus. But I also think it’s funny. I think it’s funny because after Trump started talking about it, I don’t know what the Danes thought they were doing. But King Frederick, wait a minute, has he been the one? Hold up, hold up, hold up. Is this the guy who got in trouble with his wife? Hold up. Oh, it is. So the Danish king, if you don’t know this, and the only reason I know this is because of the trash British tabloids. So Frederick got caught like two years ago. in staying overnight at his Spanish lady friend’s apartment. I think they were in Madrid. And they went out and had dinner and did all this, and they went back, and he didn’t leave her apartment until the morning. Well, they’re old friends, you know. How many of you married out there that would fly? How would that fly? Yeah, just yeah. Uh-huh. Anyway, his wife is Australian, but she speaks the language, and she’s very well revered in Denmark. Anyway, so they’ve had some drama. So Frederick, he’s the king of Denmark. His mom abdicated the throne. I think her name’s Marguerite. So he took over. And after Trump started talking about all of this, he decided that he was going to change the coat of arms to more accurately reflect Greenland and their important position to the country. So what they did is they made the bear bigger. The Danish coat of arms features a bear, which is the symbol of Greenland, and the ram, and a symbol of the Faroe Islands. And now the bear’s bigger. At first, it was just tiny little bears, two little bears in the bottom left panel. And now it’s a big, giant bear. And they’ve got the two dudes with the clubs standing. I just am fascinated by these. So they updated their coat of arms. Like, oh, look what we did. We made the bear bigger. That will show you, Trump. It’s not probably the most accurate Danish accent, but it’s the best I can do under the circumstances. So do you think that’s going to – that just seems silly. Is that silly? It’s as silly as what Trump is saying, I think, because I don’t give a rat’s ass about going into Greenland right now. Can we just make reciprocity a national thing and get rid of taxes? That would be great.

SPEAKER 11 : 25:22

I see his point on national security. If you got Russian and China ships roaring around up there in North America where there would be a national security concern. I don’t see it. And I don’t think he’s ever articulated it as us going in and invading.

SPEAKER 05 : 25:36

Yeah. When the hell did it ever happen that it was a priority? Like all of a sudden we’re like, OK. We all voted in November, right? We’re going to have – we’re going to secure the border. We’re going to build the wall, right? Yeah. We’re going to build the wall. We’re going to make groceries affordable again. We’re going to make America healthy again. We’re going to bring back Mexican Coke for everybody, not the booger sugar but the soda. And then he’s like, yeah, OK. The best I can do is Greenland.

SPEAKER 11 : 26:01

The Pawn Stars.

SPEAKER 05 : 26:04

And we’re all scratching our heads like, what the hell? I didn’t. Greenland wasn’t. I’m checking notes. Wasn’t on the list.

SPEAKER 11 : 26:11

Well, I know that the Article 1, Section 8 of our Constitution definitely lays out the responsibilities of these who are federal government.

SPEAKER 05 : 26:19

I think if you’re going to make that argument, they got to make the case.

SPEAKER 11 : 26:21

And that was my next point. If he’s not contextualizing why, because we’re small government. Why are we expanding government?

SPEAKER 05 : 26:28

This is expansionism.

SPEAKER 11 : 26:29

Yeah, this is expansionism. So he’s got to contextualize why this is important and why this falls under the purview of the executive branch here as it relates to Article I, Section 8.

SPEAKER 05 : 26:40

I sure as hell don’t want Canada. No offense, Canadians. We got some of you. Listen, I like you guys. And I like that Pierre Polivere. I like him a lot. But I don’t want Canada. I don’t want it. There’s nothing I want up there. Nothing I want. I don’t want the damn liberalism. I don’t want the crap health care. I don’t want all those damn liberal votes. I don’t want Canada. Don’t want it. Don’t want the cold. Don’t want the bears. Don’t want it. None of it. I’m with it. I hear you. Don’t… Don’t, uh… They got good syrup. And Canada’s not a victim. I mean, Newfoundland. What?

SPEAKER 11 : 27:14

They’ve got good lumber and good syrup.

SPEAKER 05 : 27:17

I don’t care about the syrup. I don’t even like pancake syrup. I don’t even like maple syrup. I don’t like it. It’s weird. What the hell are you saying? It’s tree… juice it’s weird you don’t like maple syrup no no i’d forever hate i’m gonna be looking at you through don’t like i would i’ll eat a pancake plain i won’t put nothing on it i’m not looking at you the same now for some reason like give me a fruit compote you know but i don’t want no syrup on it’s weird it’s like would you like some diabetes I’m going to pour some diabetes juice all over your pancake, all over your carbs. Yeah.

SPEAKER 11 : 27:56

I’m not so sure that maple syrup gives you diabetes, does it?

SPEAKER 05 : 27:59

It has sugar. It’s like all sugar.

SPEAKER 11 : 28:01

Yeah, but it’s not like bad refined.

SPEAKER 05 : 28:02

It’s made of sugar and crack.

SPEAKER 11 : 28:05

Of all the sugars that exist, it’s not the worst one out there.

SPEAKER 05 : 28:08

It’s pretty bad, though. You don’t need it. You don’t need it. It’s just, why do we eat it? I don’t get that. What the hell do we do some of the stuff that we do? We drink nut milk. It’s weird. It’s not milk. It’s just dirty nut water. That’s all it is, right? Like, it’s all weird. It’s all weird. Why do we do? We are so weird. No wonder that aliens stay hidden. Hell, I wouldn’t want to be like these. Oh, I want these people to be my friend. Have you seen us? We’re weirdos. No. I mean, I’m a human and I’m like, just no, thank you. Anyway, back to this. I just love this little Danish king, this little lightness loafers looking feller, who’s like, I’m going to change the coat of arms. I give you to bed. The bed’s bigger now. You can’t take Greenland. The bed is bigger. Someone asked, by the way, Lorraine informs me we have a good kind of a raid happening in the show chat, which happens in Rumble, by the way, which you can join. Someone asked if Greenland is going to get named Mara Igloo. A little he cave? I don’t know. A little he glue. It’s a he glue. Woo! I mean… I just am not interested in the expansionism. But I do think it’s hysterical that they’re like, oh, yeah, well, we change our coat of arms. Most Americans are like, the hell is a coat of arms? What? What is that even? Like, oh, you made the bear bigger. Nobody knows what that means except those people, right? Like, that’s not going to do it. That doesn’t create a magical force field around Greenland. Oh, we can’t touch him because they made the bear bigger on the coat of arms. There’s no more Vikings anymore. Stop. No one’s afraid. Good heavens. But I don’t want, I don’t really think, I don’t care. And renaming the Gulf of Mexico, is that going to make the IRS go away? Because if it does, then I’m all for it.

SPEAKER 11 : 30:10

I’m just interested to find out.

SPEAKER 05 : 30:12

We should call it the Gulf of F off is what we should call it. What?

SPEAKER 11 : 30:17

Well, if we’re going to rename it, why not name it the Gulf of America? And by the way, how much work does that actually take?

SPEAKER 05 : 30:22

I want to name it something scary so no one wants to come through it. Like the gulf of, there’s straight up monsters here. That’s the gulf of it.

SPEAKER 11 : 30:29

Gulf of death.

SPEAKER 05 : 30:31

The gulf of death. Just saying. What were you going to say?

SPEAKER 11 : 30:35

I was going to ask how much effort really goes into renaming it. Are we really wasting a ton of time because we decided to rename the Gulf to Gulf of America?

SPEAKER 05 : 30:46

And who do you go to do that? Is there an old man who lives up in a mountain somewhere and you’ve got to climb all the steps and be like, I would like to change the name of this Gulf. How does that work?

SPEAKER 11 : 30:58

I think you just declare it, and then the agreement of others makes it so.

SPEAKER 05 : 31:02

Well, then why can’t we just constantly declare stuff?

SPEAKER 11 : 31:05

I think we do.

SPEAKER 05 : 31:07

I don’t think that’s how that works.

SPEAKER 11 : 31:07

I think there’s a lot of declarations over the years, and a lot of them go against science.

SPEAKER 05 : 31:11

So you’re telling me the next time I’m fishing out in the Caribbean, if I come across an island that no one else is on, minesies? Why not? I mean, until their military shows up.

SPEAKER 11 : 31:20

I don’t know. Well, if it’s somebody’s, then yeah, I guess so.

SPEAKER 05 : 31:23

But what if it’s, is it somebody’s? I mean, you’re talking about squatting.

SPEAKER 11 : 31:27

If it’s nobody’s, then you got to deal with, you know, entities like China.

SPEAKER 05 : 31:31

I’m all for saying that the Gulf is ours.

SPEAKER 11 : 31:33

Pirates.

SPEAKER 05 : 31:35

Yeah, pirates aren’t as cool as they used to be.

SPEAKER 11 : 31:37

No.

SPEAKER 05 : 31:37

I’m all for saying that the Gulf is ours, right? Because it’s ours. Like, we’re all over there and we’re bigger than everybody else. So, you know, step off. But what does that accomplish? Wasn’t it the Gulf of Pensacola at one point? I don’t know. Was it?

SPEAKER 11 : 31:51

I didn’t know that. I thought it was named the Gulf of Mexico, and that’s their first recorded naming of that area.

SPEAKER 05 : 31:58

Just call it the Gulf of your mom and just use that as an insult to every tyrant, every foreign tyrant.

SPEAKER 11 : 32:05

It would be a waste of time if government was doing what you’re saying.

SPEAKER 05 : 32:08

I just don’t know what that does. Again, if you’re like Dana, do you know that all you have to do to accomplish all these things that you voted for is just change the name of the damn Gulf. Woman, just do it. And I’d be like, okay, I’m convinced. I want to see that magic happen. I’m totally convinced. But right now, you know, I just don’t know. I just don’t. But I sure as hell don’t want Canada. All right. Okay. I don’t want them.

SPEAKER 11 : 32:34

But I envision Trump having his daily list like this to-do, this honey-do list every day from his day one. You know what I mean? And I think like number 12 on that list is probably renaming the Gulf. I don’t know.

SPEAKER 05 : 32:45

I do think it’s funny that Denmark decided to immediately give Greenland a whole bunch of money for defense. Right. I don’t know if you guys saw this, but hang on, let me pull this up. This is hysterical. So Denmark, after Trump was saying all this stuff, they boosted Greenland’s defense after Trump started talking. So they sent a package that they said was in the double-digit billion amount. In Kron, the Danish defense minister, Trostland Poulsen, I know. I’m doing the best I can with the Danish. I can’t do it. Everything sounds like that guy from the Frozen movie. It’s a double-digit billion amount. It’s only a fate. So they said that they were planning all of a sudden a stronger presence into Arctic, is what they’re saying. So they’re including increasing staffing at Arctic Command in the capital of Nuuk, which is right where Junior went. I can’t do a Danish accent. Nuke. I can do like 10 accents really well, and that’s about it. This is not one of them. They said that it’s going to be about $12 to $15 billion, or krone. And it was the day after Trump was trolling about it on Truth Social. So now all of a sudden they just decided, oh, we’re just going to boost the defense here. That’s all. I don’t know. But… Is I’d not say I what if that was the goal? Everything is so stupid and crazy. What if it was the goal? Because if that was the goal to get these nations to spend more on their own defense, then why not just threaten all of them with with taking them over? And then they’ll be like, oh, we’ll spend all these NATO nations will suddenly start contributing more to their self-defense. So they don’t have to be our welfare children anymore. I’m just saying, you know, I don’t know. I don’t know. Let’s just accomplish what we need to accomplish now and then later. But changing the coat of arms is hysterical.

SPEAKER 01 : 34:54

Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.