In today’s episode, explore the bizarre tales of the ‘Florida Man’ and delve into the chaotic world of political satire. We tackle the facades in political speeches and late-night television, reminding us of Johnny Carson’s wisdom about authenticity. Enjoy a thoughtful discourse on the hypocrisy in media and politics, and the cultural dynamics shaping public discourse in unexpected ways.
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Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.
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It’s his life mission to make bad decisions.
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It’s time for Florida Man.
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That’s right. It’s time for Florida Man on the Dana Show, D-Lash, Dana Lash Radio, and X on Twitter. I am Craig Collins filling in. A Florida man put somebody else in his car over a crazy, crazy argument that happened at a 7-Eleven. So a Florida clerk is working, and a dude comes into the 7-Eleven in Florida, of course. The guy, I think, is 49 years old. This is in Seminole County where it happened. And he wants to buy some black and milds. He wants to buy some some cigars, some very popular small cigars, actually. He said that the clerk didn’t immediately stop cleaning up to serve him. So he got mad. He started to yell and they got into a verbal argument. And at one point, the clerk at the 7-Eleven decided to usher the man out of the establishment into his vehicle and lock him. which I find hilarious. I also do think that it’s the kind of thing that you’re sort of weak if you allow someone to do. But anyway, nonetheless, yes, the guy, the defendant, wound up getting shut inside a vehicle that he couldn’t get out of for some reason. That’s when he called 911 to say that he had been detained and arrested by the 7-Eleven clerk who thought he was being disrespectful in the first place. This only happens in Florida, man. You only have somebody walk into an establishment, get mad about the service they provide, and then have that person who you’re mad at decide to pseudo arrest you, which is illegal. That is a crime. You do get in trouble for that. He said the defendant that he was scared that something else might happen, which is part of the reason he went along with being locked inside the guy’s car. Come on, dude. Just leave. Just decide not to get your black and mild and leave when the clerk is berating you for being upset with them and then also threatening to lock you into their vehicle. This story is crazy, though. Another Florida man that I do like, a guy in Marion County, decided to build a tire fortress around his property when he thought people were being a little bit too nosy. This is the kind of thing I just accept and not even really pay attention to, to be honest. If I live next to a Florida tire fort guy, I just think that was the cost of living in beautiful Florida. All right, quick break. A lot more. Greg Collins filling in on The Dana Show. I would not have said that Biden’s brain was broken if he was doing this many interviews this well with media every day. But of course, his administration knew that he wouldn’t. So they protected him at all costs from anyone and everyone in media. And actually, it’s not like they could roll out the vice president. Her word salad broken crazy things seem to demonstrate that her brain might also be broken at a much younger age, which is probably bad. Case in point might be this. There’s a new viral clip that shows Kamala Harris talking about how babies would be passed around at her rallies. This is a weird thing to brag about, by the way. Like, not pass to her to kiss them. She just, like, would see in the audience a whole bunch of people just passing around babies. Whether or not that’s my child and I trust all the people around me to give the child back to me, that’s not important. We’re celebrating the vice president, apparently, and her run for office by passing around babies just at any kind of event for some reason. Here is how Kamala Harris described this.
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You know, one of my favorite things to see, and it would always happen spontaneously at our rallies, and thousands of people would come, and it would happen is invariably somebody would want me to take a picture or to hug their child, and someone in the back would hand that baby over. Just hand the baby. Through the crowd. Up to you. Of people who would. Bless the baby. But pass the baby. See. And then pass the baby back.
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Pass the baby back. This is ridiculous. It didn’t happen, by the way. This not only didn’t occur as often as Kamala Harris wants to say it did, but if it did, she should have immediately said no to this. Like, don’t just hand your baby to strangers. Don’t do that just to get a picture with me and the baby. This seems ridiculous and bad. It’s insane. And there’s so many different versions of just broken, ridiculous, lying craziness. But that is Harris. And she also said it with that twang and voice that she’s trying to use, depending on who she thinks her audience is. Her speech changes, which is weird, and it happens for a lot of people in politics. And I want to say another thing about that real quick. I know that’s not what this rant is about, per se. If you’re someone, Jasmine Crockett’s another name that comes to mind, and Trump recently called her low IQ again. But if you’re someone who talks like that in your real life, like when the cameras are off, when you’re not in front of the microphone, and you can say it’s because of your ethnicity or whatever you want, If you’re someone who talks in that weird version of speech that I don’t use as a white dude, then do it all the time. Don’t do it occasionally. Do it constantly. Own who you are. Be yourself. Don’t be performative in another way if your performance is actually the version of you that doesn’t speak like that. I think that that would be good for society is to be who you are all the time, because it would make me not accuse you of being performative when you do it occasionally, when in front of certain audiences. And Hillary Clinton did this. A bunch of other people did this. And I know if you’re a black, you’ll couch this in. Well, this is how I actually am. I just can’t be this way because white people wouldn’t like it. Well, that’s as inauthentic as the opposite, as pretending that you’re something you’re not, depending on what crowd you’re in front of. Just be yourself and see if you can get votes that way. But that’s why I don’t believe it. I don’t think that these individuals are like this. And actually, what I most appreciate… I guess this is the last thing I’ll say before I take a break. I most appreciate about Trump, about Elon Musk, about Charlie Kirk. Very tragic to have lost Charlie Kirk. I know I didn’t fill in for Dana after that, and she did an amazing job. You should check out the videos and audio that’s out there, Dana, who knew Charlie and how she talked about him. But something that they said about Charlie Kirk that they say about Elon and Trump, same person. in front of microphone, in front of camera, as they are off camera, off microphone, exact same, same beliefs, same thoughts, same mannerisms, just identical individual. And that is so rare in our society, especially in politics. It’s so rare that it deserves to be celebrated. And these individuals who don’t do it, who don’t do any form of it, deserve to be told that they need to behave differently and be rejected by society until they actually are the real version of themselves, whatever it is. Because the performance is the thing that acts like you and I are stupid. It definitely does not respect the audience when you do performative versions of anything. And so I think it’s sort of amazing that, That we have that version of defense that comes out whenever someone does throw in the slang more. And then they say, well, that’s who I actually am. But you can’t take it as the white people out there or the whoever out there in society. So I can only be myself occasionally. That means you’re a liar. And that means you’re probably lying about a whole bunch of other things. If it’s even true that that’s the lie that the lie you’re telling us is actually a fact and not just another lie.
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Erica Kirk demonstrates the power of her Christian faith by forgiving her husband’s murderer. The communist Chinese are likely culprits in a plot against critical U.S. communications. Will we ever get serious about confronting them? And Google’s parent company admits what we already knew, that it censored YouTube accounts on orders from the Biden administration. I’m Greg Karumbas, inviting you to join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday for the Three Martini Lunch podcast. We’ll give you the top news, some good laughs, and we’ll be done in less than 30 minutes. Follow the Three Martini Lunch on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
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That’s right. It’s time for a Quick Five on the Dana Show. Thrilled to be with you. My name is Craig Collins filling in. This is funny whenever this happens. But a ref turned on a microphone during Thursday night football last night. And just as he was talking and making a call, a player walked by him and said a very bad word. Seattle, Arizona, final score 23-20. This moment probably, you know, as entertaining as a very good game. Here we go.
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Jackson Smith and Jigba, who didn’t really need to make the hole, is right in front of the ball carrier.
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Offense number 11. 10-yard penalty. Be careful. He even looked, didn’t he? He did. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah.
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Beautiful.
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I love all the reactions to it after they hear the bad word that gets played on television, mostly because I bet you the player did it on purpose. I think that you know as the mic’s on, you want your side of the equation to be thrown in there, and that’s what it was. So I like that all the time. I like when players are mic’d up. I like when baseball does it. Everything about it is just a lot of fun. Let’s get more of that going on. I don’t care if bad words happen. It’s a part of the game, baby. They’re saying a whole lot of bad things on the field all the time. Amazon has agreed to pay $2.5 billion to settle a lawsuit about deceptive practices and forcing you into certain things as far as your Amazon Prime membership is concerned. Deceptive Prime enrollment practices is what it was saying. The suit was filed in 2023 under the Biden administration. It claimed that Amazon created confusing and deceptive user interfaces that led consumers to enroll in Prime without knowing it. to pay a whole bunch of money. So yeah, yet another company that’s big and terrible and overly powerful in our society doing something bad and getting hit with a speed bump that they’ll pay. Even if the speed bump is that significant, they’ll figure out a way to throw that money in and just keep going, just keep doing more of the same. All right. Another thing out there, Starbucks has announced significant store closures and layoffs. This is causing a whole lot of chaos on the left. CNN is one of the places that reported on this and talked about how it might be because Starbucks has dealt with a whole lot of employees who have unionized. And that means that Starbucks is bad, not the other thing. The thing is that Starbucks is struggling a whole lot because a bunch of its stores are Not as popular, apparently. And the amount of money they’re paying off their workers, maybe not as great as it used to be. So, again, a big reason why likely this whole thing is shutting down or not all of them, but a bunch of Starbucks are closing is because you can’t force a business to do something that doesn’t benefit the business. Inevitably, they just close the whole thing down. Not surprised at all. And again, I don’t think I’ll go into the fear mongering version of this is bad because because this is how companies react to losing money. They close businesses. There’s a guy that needs to be publicly roasted. Ticketmaster CEO says concert tickets are too cheap. Actually, that’s ridiculous, of course, to a whole lot of us. But the CEO at Ticketmaster would like concert tickets to be more expensive. So he makes more money. Mostly what he’s saying is that they get resold on the secondary market for more money than actually people pay for them originally, and it’s cutting into his profits, baby. What an idiot. All right, quick break. A lot more. Craig Collins filling in on the Dana Show.
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And by the way, celebrating… Kimmel this week has probably been one of the most annoying things the left has done. I don’t think they’ll be watching long term because Kimmel’s just really not that good. He alienates half his audience and how hardcore politically he is something that, um, You know, I really love a quote from Johnny Carson about this. And I’m about to be 40, so I’m not someone who grew up watching Carson. But you can still appreciate the significance of Johnny Carson to late-night television. And one thing he said about not sharing his own opinion in that world is that if you do it too often, it starts to become something that you believe is more important than just entertaining people. You start to be so full of yourself—this is Carson’s opinion— That you no longer are serving your audience. You’re serving yourself and how you throw out your opinions on a daily basis in the world of late night entertainment television. And I think he’s absolutely right about that. There are places and forums where what you, you know, choose to go and consume is going to be opinionated, political, whatever. I mean, this show is a great example of that. Dana is not going to be shy about her opinions on a daily basis on this show because that’s what this show is about. But if she were given a late night, you know, entertainment talk show, I shouldn’t speak for Dana, but I think if anybody were given a late night entertainment talk show, some part of them might say, hey, if I can try to lay off the politics a little more in that atmosphere, maybe I’d have a larger audience. This is something that Kimmel and others seem to refuse to learn that Johnny Carson knew is that if you’re not coming to me for political opinion and when you used to turn on late night entertainment interview TV, you weren’t going there for political opinion. And a whole lot of people do not go there for political opinion now. That’s why they don’t watch it. Then you shouldn’t add it. You actually you know what I also love? It’s something that a couple guys in sports radio talk about. I won’t name them. I don’t want to push you anywhere other than this show. But I do love when people say that the audience determines what I pay attention to, not what I think of it. That’s not how the audience gets to tell me what to do. My opinion will always be my own. I have to share my own. I have to be honest about what I think because anything else is going to fail. Honestly, that’s the number one trick I think of media in general, whatever form you’re on, is say what you actually think. It’ll be easier than trying to make up stuff that you don’t believe. But as far as what topics you discuss, absolutely, the audience can dictate which ones you should be focused on because it’s the ones they care about. and the ones they probably most want your take on. And that’s something that comes from sports media too. And I love that when people say that, when they push you that road, because it is true. It is valuable to pay attention to the things that other people are paying attention to. Now, case in point, to get back to something else I was trying to say though, is late night hosts celebrate it. Trump being censored and removed from all media. Jimmy Kimmel, for about a week, lost a network talk show. He got it back, but he lost it for a few days. He wasn’t silenced at any form of social media. He absolutely joked about the death of Charlie Kirk, and he absolutely tried to point the finger at MAGA. and claimed that the killer of Charlie Kirk was a MAGA individual, which he’s absolutely not. No part of that makes any sense. He then came back without apologizing and said that he never meant to say the things he evidently said. But nonetheless, he wasn’t silenced as much as Trump was. This did not occur in the same capacity whatsoever. And here is the left celebrating the silencing of someone that they heavily disagree with. Again, something that didn’t even happen to Kimmel. But now Kimmel and others are pretending as though it’s a freedom of speech thing for them and for, you know, this one person to be kept on network television, even though, as I said a moment ago, he’s already alienating half of the audience. and how he chooses to be overly political when they’re really coming there for entertainment, or at least used to come there for that and not for the political ranting.
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Trump has been suspended from Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and even Snapchat. But don’t worry, Mr. President, there are still plenty of apps you do have access to. You still have Spotify to drown out the sound of millions of people cheering as you leave. Google, Apple and Amazon removed the Parler app from their platforms. Parlor is where all the right wingers gather to post QA nonsense and misspelled the word parlor. Trumpers are complaining bitterly that they’re being silenced. In fact, they won’t shut up about being silenced.
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I love having Donald Trump off Twitter, not to mention all the other toxic racists and conspiracy theorists that have been booted off.
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Damn, a lifetime Twitter ban has got a sting. They took away his precious. Twitter isn’t the only social media site that wants nothing to do with our president. He’s also been banned or restricted from a bevy of other platforms, including Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, Reddit, even Twitch. What are you waiting for, Pornhub? It’s not a coincidence. Yeah, way to go.
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Stephen Colbert, hilarious, hilarious stuff. Anyway, again, they all celebrated this. And these are the same people that are up in arms now saying that, you know, the right to have a talk show is the same as the right of a president of the United States to be left on social media platforms. The silencing of Trump while he was still in the office of president is absolutely one of the most ridiculous things that ever happened in our society. And it should be the same thing where the, you know, free speech warrior is up in arms screaming and yelling and all of them were celebrating it. So you reap what you sow seems to be an aspect of that in the world of these individuals being so proud of something. If it inevitably even remotely close to the same, which it wasn’t happens to them, they get to react the way they do. But guess what? We’re not all that surprised that it occurs. And maybe more of these people deserve to be fired because they don’t have anywhere near the audience that Carson used to have. because no one cares about hearing their political opinion so much. Let the audience tell you what it wants to hear you talk about. Don’t be defiant in the face of that when your ratings are terrible.
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Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Absurd Truth: Nancy Pelosi Debuts Southern Accent