SPEAKER 06 : 0:00

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SPEAKER 05 : 0:15

Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.

SPEAKER 07 : 0:21

It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.

SPEAKER 02 : 0:29

All right. So first up, the last time we had a story like this, it was a dude. Now it is definitely not a dude. It’s a chick, a Florida woman who got arrested over the weekend because police found drugs in a bag labeled definitely not a bag full of drugs. It was a little canvas bag with a black zipper. And in black writing, it says in cursive, definitely not a bag full of drugs on the side. So guess what? There were drugs in the bag that said there were no drugs in the bag. In fact, it was trafficking amounts of methamphetamine. Yeah. Possession with intent to sell all kinds of other stuff. She had to post this woman. What is her name? I was so busy looking at the design of the bag. Let’s see. This Florida woman, Taryn Ackrey, at the center of all of this, they conducted a traffic stop and that’s when they caught it. But she posted a $15,500 bond. That’s the bag that Juan is showing you on the simulcast if you’re watching. Definitely not a bag full of drugs. Look at her face. The face is her reacting to the narrator going, there was meth in the bag. trafficking amounts of meth in the bag. I mean, if I’m pulling you over and you already seem sus and you have that in your, you know, tote, definitely not a bag full of drugs with meth. Yeah, yeah, I’m pretty sure. So they’ve charged her. And yeah, there was Narcan, needles, meth, all the stuff to use, I guess, to… divide up the drugs right I don’t know like those little accessories I don’t know where you get those the drug accessories you just chop up your drugs with I don’t know and that was all in the bag with the meth so yeah she in trouble I don’t know a lot about the drug stuff I just I don’t know everything all I know is that Miami Vice they did a lot of cocaine and I all I know about drugs are from Miami Vice and cops and so I just assume you chop everything up or it’s in crystals right I don’t know sure Sure. A woman claims that her murdered husband fell on a hidden cane blade during a diabetic episode. Yeah, so like he was having a diabetic episode and he just happened to fall down on a giant blade. And it came, the folks who helped bring you the program. It’s our friends over at All Family Pharmacy. This is such a great service. You need to memorize the website. They make it so easy. All Family Pharmacy helped my family out a lot over Thanksgiving because, you know, right on Thanksgiving when offices are closed and you end up getting sick, it’s just, it’s a mess and you got to get medicine. All Family Pharmacy made it super easy. And you can visit allfamilypharma.com slash Dana. Use code Dana and you’ll get 10% off of your entire order. So this is affordable access, easy and cost effective for medicine. You don’t have to break the bank to access these medicines. There’s no red tape. There’s no hassle. Everything’s made in the USA. You’re not getting Chinese antibiotics. It’s not how that’s working. They got a proven track record. And you work with their doctors. Their doctors get you the medication that you need, fast delivery right to your door. You can even overnight stuff if needed. And you can rely on all family pharmacy to keep your health needs on track. If you need antibiotics, if you need things like hydroxychloroquine or ivermectin. which is actually a good antiviral, you can get those at All Family Pharmacy. Visit allfamilypharma.com slash Dana. Get 10% off using code Dana. 10% off your purchase using code Dana10. It’s Dana10 for 10% off of your entire order only at allfamilypharma.com slash Dana. Speaking of all of that, you know, here he’s talking about the back pay for military members who were forced out. And you have these pardons that were given to Anthony Fauci. In fact, the pardons were given to General Milley, Anthony Fauci, the entire Biden family, and even Republican Jay Sixers, the people who are like Liz Cheney. They’re trying to guard against what they claim might be potential revenge from a Trump administration. Right. Rich coming from an administration that was nothing more than an extension of Obama that that actually weaponized government agencies to target people in a vengeance campaign. The irony of irony is right. And then one of those, Anthony Fauci, John Carl, who works over at ABC said, He spoke with Anthony Fauci and says Fauci said he’s grateful because of the threats and possibility of a politically motivated prosecution creates a measurable and intolerable distress on me and my family. End quote. He was given a preemptive pardon. He I mean, it’s not. And he says that he didn’t seek it, didn’t want it. But note that Fauci is not turning it down. He’s not turning it down. The. This is why people don’t like Anthony Fauci. Anthony Fauci thinks that he is the second Jesus. Anthony Fauci thinks that he is the second Messiah and that he is performing such a great sacrifice. I’ve never seen such a sacrifice make so many millions of dollars for someone as Anthony Fauci has made off of this gain of function research. And when he talks about the immeasurable and intolerable, quote unquote, distress on him and his family, I want you to think for a moment. of the immeasurable and intolerable distress that was put on the families of those who had to say goodbye to their loved ones behind glass walls in hospitals because Fauci’s recommendations for dealing with the Wu flu wouldn’t allow them to be there at the bedside of their dying relative. I want him to talk about, I want him to consider the immeasurable and intolerable distress that was placed on a friend of mine that had to choose between her and her brother to be there as their father passed away. And then which one of them was going to be able to be graveside to bury him? You know, because the regulations that Fauci recommended. Or what about the immeasurable and intolerable distress that was put on another one of my friends who had to delay her cancer treatment because everything was shut down due to Fauci’s recommendations? My friend is fighting breast cancer, and she had to delay all of that because of Fauci’s recommendations. Or about the people that we know that were dealing with fertility issues that had to put behind their hormone shots so they could try to conceive naturally as best as they could because all of that was interrupted by Fauci’s recommendations. What about all of the kids who missed birth? Crucial years of development because they were forced to stay inside for 15 days that turned into two years thanks to Fauci’s recommendations. If you want to have a discussion about immeasurable and intolerable distress, you absolute corrupt son of a bitch. That’s sickening. Anyone should be dragged into jail in chains. It ought to be Anthony Fauci. And I hope Trump learned his lesson by listening to him. Because none of that is worth going through again. None of it. And this guy’s pardoned. Why does he need a pardon? Why does Fauci need a pardon? General Milley, the guy who sat there, you remember the book that he was reading? What was that book, Kane? Something about white privilege or something like that? Understanding white privilege? I don’t know. Why is he pardoned? Why is General Milley pardoned? What crime could Milley have undertaken that he would need a pardon? He is a general. He is in charge of our charge of our military. I don’t I. I don’t think that General Milley should be pardoned, and I don’t think that he should be allowed in any power, make any office of decision making ever. If you need a pardon, you shouldn’t be allowed to command troops. If you need a pardon like Milley needs, apparently you shouldn’t be you shouldn’t be allowed to call the shots when it comes to putting our loved ones in harm’s way. Because they don’t get a pardon. But you do? Hell no. There are service members that have the books thrown at them for less than probably now what Milley’s being pardoned for. But he gets a pardon. Unreal. I want you to count the number of medals that are on General Milley’s coat. And then you count the number of medals that General Patton wore. He had tons of them. But he didn’t wear them. Because he didn’t need to brag about himself every time like some kind of North Korean officer when he went in public. I question those people that wear all that metal and they got some baby hands. Smooth skin. Why does he need a pardon? I got a lot of questions. A whole fam damley of Bidens are pardoned. All of them pardoned. Isn’t that unbelievable? I mean, and they all get the date. It’s all everything. All anything committed from January 1st, 2014 to the date of the pardon. I mean, it goes all the way back for all of them. Fauci, the Bidens, everybody. Interesting that, isn’t it? Interesting. But I thought none of them were guilty. I thought it was just all Russian disinformation and the audacity of them to say that they are the ones who are worried about vengeance. They are the ones worried about vengeance. Unreal. It is a big week and we’re not just talking about Inauguration Day. Kel-Tec has officially unveiled their brand new pistol, the PR-57, and it’s causing a huge buzz. Over a million views on the release video already. And you need to see why. Visit keltecweapons.com slash Dana today. Right now. Check it out. It’s the Kel-Tec PR57. It’s a revolutionary compact concealed carry pistol chambered in 5.7. It’s ultra-lightweight, 20-round capacity. And here’s what’s the kicker. It’s a unique top-loading design. It’s slim, simple, and practical. You’re not going to have a magazine. In fact, the PR57 loads directly into the grip. It’s a rotary barrel design, and it reduces weight by 40% compared to the other 5.7 millimeters on the market. And it’s not just innovative. 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SPEAKER 07 : 10:49

And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.

SPEAKER 02 : 10:54

Florida Highway Patrol’s issued a safety advisory ahead of an incoming storm. They’re expecting freezing temperatures in Florida. Perfect, right? Oh, let’s see. Staten Island groups are using flower power against New York City speed cameras. Nobody wants this intrusive, intrusive spy government. They’re taping fake flowers in front of the in front of the cameras. That’s actually hysterical. I love it. So good idea. The this let’s see. OK, so apparently a Jefferson County and this is in our county that we grew up in. Yeah, it’s Missouri’s Jefferson County. Missouri Supreme Court suspended a Jefferson County prosecutor, assistant prosecutor, his license indefinitely for a prank that he did. And the prank was when an assistant public defender left the room, this prosecutor went on that person’s laptop and used their email to send the sheriff an email saying, quote, you look so good in khaki pants and that black shirt. Oh, no. That ended up getting the guy fired. And they said you had access to confidential information. That’s what they were alleging. And so, yeah, he ended up… That’s like one of the industries in which you can’t really do that kind of stuff. You shouldn’t, you know, you shouldn’t do that sort of stuff. uh also let’s see uh this is oh check this out bear county jury found finds this guy 100 negligent because he served what they said was dangerously hot barbecue sauce and i swear i heard a ton of you out there right when i said sauce go yeah it’s not hot until i try it and say it’s hot because i know you people you know those people they they’ll sit there they’ll eat a whole bunch of ghost peppers and sit there and they will die before they sweat to death

SPEAKER 07 : 13:00

Spicy hot, not temperature hot?

SPEAKER 02 : 13:02

I don’t know. Bill Miller Barbecue has been ordered to pay $2.8 million for serving dangerously hot barbecue sausage. Spicy? Is it? I don’t know. A San Antonio woman sued him. She said it was hot and it gave her burns. Spicy and it gave her burns. I’m like, well, what? Like, what in the world? Okay, I don’t know. When you get hot food, you have to assume it’s hot, and when you’re getting something spicy, you have to assume that it’s spicy. You know what I’m saying? Okay, people are dumb. Ooh, a ski lift collapsed at a Spanish resort. I’m not a big skier. I don’t like snow. Apparently, the ski lift just totally collapsed, and it hurt 10 people pretty badly. Two of them were seriously injured. Okay, we’ve got to watch Audio Soundbite 14, because Tabra is melting down, because you have… Musk, Zuckerberg, Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerberg, Sam Altman, Jeff Bezos, Tim Cook, all the tech bras, the techocracy that’s there. Honestly, sidebar, it’s like a Warhammer thing where you’re going in and you’re talking to Hadron. So the Hadron juniors are all there. Listen to this.

SPEAKER 04 : 14:09

Anderson, between those four people, plus Elon Musk from Twitter or X, those five people that I just mentioned, the four in the photograph and also Elon Musk, control so much of the information that we receive. So much is in their hands when it comes to ascertaining, monitoring, or refusing to monitor what is real, what is not real. And we’re about to enter an era of deep fakes and all sorts of misinformation. And the degree to which those five gentlemen play a role or do not play a role will be pivotal in terms of where the American people are.

SPEAKER 02 : 14:53

Okay. I am… Can you just want just just the screen cap of that last image that you had up there, the full screen, the CNN screen, because there’s so many things in here to remark on. You have Jake Tapper freaking out about the tech bros. Right. Do you see the little black line up at the top where it says gives you the time and it tells you where everybody is? St. John’s Church. Now, can correct me if I’m wrong, which is a rhetorical device. I’m not wrong. Is that not the church that the left tried to burn down? Is that not the church that CNN, the network whose screen is right there, they were trying to say that everything was mostly peaceful and at first they didn’t even report on that church burning down?

SPEAKER 07 : 15:40

The very same. Huh.

SPEAKER 02 : 15:43

Imagine that.

SPEAKER 07 : 15:43

Weird.

SPEAKER 02 : 15:44

It’s kind of weird, isn’t it? I mean, they’re worried about deep fakes and misinformation. Like, I don’t know. What do you mean? Misinformation like, oh, I don’t know, Russian collusion? misinformation like the laptop that had Hunter Biden’s name on it and it was Hunter Biden’s is not Hunter Biden’s? That disinformation? I’m curious. I mean, now suddenly after they’re not committing it they think everyone else will i don’t know i am just floored all of a sudden these people are like wait a minute the things that we’ve been doing all of these years they may do well we have to talk about the threats of what they may do that we’ve done all these years it’s only a threat if they think the right is going to also do it that’s just crazy crazy Yeah, they are very upset. Van Jones is upset as well. I’ve not seen him this mad since he was mad over somebody telling him that 9-11 was a terror attack. Audio soundbite 15, you know, because he thought it was fake.

SPEAKER 03 : 16:46

I kind of hope I’m miserable. I’m sad. I’m frustrated. I’m mad at everybody. Thank you, Scott. Thank you. Look, I appreciate what you’re trying to do, reminding us that we’re supposed to. Look, if you’re a progressive or a Democrat right now, if you’re watching television, you’re watching it probably with some substances, because he’s going to unleash this blitzkrieg of attacks on everything we care about, immigrants, clean energy, and nothing we can do about it but watch this stuff. So I appreciate you, but I’m miserable and I’m upset. And I know you’re going to say something, Scott, that’s going to make me more upset. Go ahead.

SPEAKER 05 : 17:18

No, I’m going to make you happy because, A, we’re going to cut your taxes, too.

SPEAKER 02 : 17:25

And we’re going to cut your taxes on top of it. Amazing. So that’s, you know, I’m actually, I’m excited for that one. But they’re losing it. And then you have AOC losing her mind. Audio 7 by 13. She’s losing it.

SPEAKER 01 : 17:43

Well, we are on the eve of an authoritarian administration. This is what 21st century fascism is starting to look like. Republicans really model themselves after Orban’s Hungary. And so you can look to see how Viktor Orban runs Hungary to get a taste of how they will try to govern and control Hungary. media, and companies in the United States.

SPEAKER 07 : 18:19

You look how I feel.

SPEAKER 02 : 18:20

Oh my gosh, she’s making me do this. Every time she talks, I just, my whole face, my butt revolts. First off, she has no idea about Viktor Orban. She doesn’t know anything about Hungary. And not everyone on the right subscribes to that. She just read a story probably somewhere. And now in her little feeble progressive mind is like, oh, the whole right’s going to be like Viktor Orban. If it says that somebody here is talking to Viktor Orban, then the whole right’s going to be like Viktor Orban from Hungary. And I’m going to, with that, demonstrate my knowledge of knowing foreign leaders. It’s the only foreign leader I know. Because she wrote a piece about it. It’s so stupid. No, the United States is not seeking to model itself after Hungary. Hungary is trying to model itself after the United States. But there’s a lot of big government stuff that they’re doing that the United States doesn’t do, that the right doesn’t actually support. So her argument is probably as bad as her drinks are. That’s why she couldn’t cut it as a bartender. So she decided to go into the world’s oldest profession. No, not prostitution. That has more respect. Politics. So they’re just big mad. Big mad. You… I noticed that Karen Pence and Michelle Obama weren’t there today. Yeah, that’s weird. Mike Pence was there. And then Barack Obama was there. Michelle Obama wasn’t there, nor was Karen Pence. Interesting. Very interesting.

SPEAKER 05 : 19:47

Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.