Join us as we explore new frontiers in firearm innovation with the Kel-Tec PR57, designed for lightweight and efficient concealed carry. Meanwhile, our hosts tackle significant social issues, including the impact of viral social media content from celebrities and the obligations of those who enter a country illegally. Stay engaged, informed, and entertained with our quick-fire news at the end of the show.
If you like true crime, you’ll love the Miracle Files podcast.
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We share real stories with the suspense of true crime, but we’ll leave you with a sense of light and hope.
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Like the college wrestler who fought a grizzly, the woman who was dead for nearly an hour, or the child lost in a dark mine for days. These are the kind of stories that remind us miracles are real.
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Subscribe to the Miracle Files wherever you get your podcasts and join us on this thrilling journey of faith and miracles.
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Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.
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It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
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I’m like terrified of half of these stories here because I feel like, you know, our Florida Man was real busy this past weekend. So let’s start. Excuse me. I’m actually not sick at all because I did all my preventative stuff, as you just heard me talk about. All right. So first up. Okay. So let’s do the bald man with the slim man. A Florida attorney allegedly attacked the father of a girl who caught in front of him in the buffet line at a meat station. Okay. Oh gosh, how do I do this? If anybody is missing any kind of like cheek meat or forehead meat or neck meat, it’s because this gentleman has it all. Mark Rower, he is facing one kind of aggravated battery with a deadly weapon, according to Palm Beach County Jail. It occurred on January 18th at a wedding in Boca Raton at a country club there. Miami New Times said that the defendant was in line at the prime rib carving station when two young girls cut in front of him. He got angry about being cut in front of the father of one of the girls, and then it went downhill from there. The deputy wrote, quote, the slimmer man ignored the man yelling at him and did not respond. And without provocation, the large bald man struck the slimmer man on the head with a dinner plate. And from there on, a melee began between a large number of the wedding guests. Yeah, and they got separated, and apparently it was supposed to be a dry party. All bets are off when there’s a prime rib station, though. All bets are off. I don’t care if there’s no liquor there. All bets are off during a prime rib station event. Prime rib station event. I repeat, prime rib. It’s important. As we move, our partners that help bring you the program. It’s our friends over at Caltech, the PR. It’s a five seven. They call it the 57 and there’s reasons for that, but I’m not going to get into it right now. This is the coolest. I finally got to see it. I don’t have it yet. I will. This is one of the coolest end guns I’ve ever seen. It’s a, if you’ve ever dreamed. So like me as a woman and my mind, I’m like way bigger than I am in terms of, you know, muscle mass and everything else and height. But in reality, I’m not, I’m like, I lie and say I’m five seven. We’ll go with that. Um, and you know, I weigh about a buck 20. So when I’m If I’m carrying something, I have to make sure that it’s like super compact if I’m carrying on my person. Women just dress differently than dudes. And my dream has always been able to carry like concealed carry a 5’7″, right? I think I might actually be able to do this with the PR57 from Kel-Tec. This thing is so lightweight and so thin. It’s crazy. They changed concealed carry back in 95. They’re the inventors of the concealed compact pistol category. And they did it again with this PR 57. So it loads from the top. And here’s the crazy thing. So there’s not, it doesn’t use magazines. It uses legit stripper clips. I’ve never even loaded anything with a stripper clip until this weekend. So I’m really excited about this because that makes it lighter and thinner. And I think George Kellgren is like in the best way to say it, an absolute mad scientist, a super nice guy. And he was just like, you know, I’m going to make the gun that you didn’t ask for. And then now everyone’s like, we didn’t ask for it, but we need it. It’s the PR-57 from Kel-Tec. Learn more about it. It’s the first of its kind. It has a rotary barrel pistol. There’s all sorts of new stuff on this. Visit keltecweapons.com, K-E-L-T-E-C, weapons.com to learn more.
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Donald Trump is sworn in as president again. Joe Biden preemptively pardons political allies and more family members as he exits. And the American people strongly back the new president on deportations and transgender policy. I’m Greg Karumbas. Join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday for the Three Martini Lunch podcast. We’ll give you the good, bad, and crazy news of the day, and hopefully a lot of laughs too. Follow the Three Martini Lunch on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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I just want to say that I’m so sorry. All my people are getting attacked. The children.
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What?
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I don’t understand. I’m so sorry. I wish I could do something, but I can’t. I don’t know what to do. Oh my gosh, I’ve never seen… I’ll try everything I’ve…
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When she’s so Selena Gomez films and attention seeking video of herself crying and she’s so upset and she says, my people, I thought she was an American. Am I wrong? Is she a Mexican national?
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Is she illegal?
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Yeah. I mean, are you an illegal immigrant? What are you talking about? My people? You’re American. What are you talking about? My people are getting attacked. What do you mean attacked? Like Lake and Riley attack? Like attacked like Lake and Riley? Or maybe is she talking about attacked like Rachel Nungary? I mean, what do you mean attacked? Like those attack like that? Because telling someone that if you enter a sovereign country like Mexico, for instance, that you’ll be deported… That’s not attacking someone. That’s saying you broke the law. Actually, you attacked us because you broke the law. Now we’re returning you home. Welcome back. Dana Lash here with you at the top of this third hour. When I see people make videos like this, first off, Selena Gomez is attention-seeking. She is desperate for attention. She is desperate for public validation. I think some people just have such low levels of confidence that they mistake it for like mental instability in some respects. Honestly, I don’t know. She has such a thirst for public adoration. And I guess that’s why she is recording herself crying. Did she record herself crying? crying for Rachel Nungary because I looked and I don’t see anything like that I don’t I didn’t see her crying about Rachel Morin I didn’t see people making videos of themselves crying into their phones over this I didn’t see that I mean this this is horrible Sorry, I said Rachel Nungry. I meant Jocelyn Nungry. Rachel’s the mother. Jocelyn was 12 years old, and she was murdered by two illegal immigrants who were from Venezuela. They left her little body in a shallow creek. That wasn’t apparently sad enough for Selena Gomez to cry over. She was strangled, assaulted. I can’t imagine… But there were no tears for how 12-year-old Jocelyn Nungary was killed. Not from Selena Gomez. She’s worried about her people being attacked. She’s an American, but whatever. But what about 12-year-old Jocelyn Nungary? Imagine being her mother and the tears. But no, she didn’t record any footage for that. She didn’t record any footage for Lake and Riley. She was murdered when she was out jogging in Georgia. 26-year-old illegal immigrant from Venezuela. He kidnapped her. She was assaulted, violated. She was strangled. She was beaten to death. Left. Had her whole life ahead of her 22-year-old nursing student. I didn’t see any tears from Selena Gomez for Lake and Riley. I didn’t see any tears for Selena Gomez from her about the officer who was struck and killed by a drunk driving illegal immigrant while the officer stopped to help a motorist. I didn’t see any tears from Selena Gomez about that. Notice how she doesn’t even actually identify what she thinks is being attacked. She just talks about my people and it’s about me, me, me. It’s performative. It’s theater. Selena Gomez is a bad actress and her, I’m going to record myself. I mean, it’s like, it’s like something like, I’m gonna use my phone case. Wait a minute. My hair is okay. Oh, I can’t. I can’t. It is vapid, shallow, ditzy, and embarrassing. It’s performative theater that’s callous and completely disregards the real pain, the actual trauma, and the real attacks of people like Rachel Moran, of people like Jocelyn Hungry, of people like Lake and Riley. All females. Are those not your people? I just, any reservations I had about, you know, maybe not being courteous to her are gone after that video. That’s shameful. Imagine being so self-obsessed. that you post a video of yourself bawling about this stuff. I can’t… God help me if I ever do. That will be your sign that I am possessed by a Martian. If that ever happens. If I ever post a video where I’m crying about anything, that’s your sign that I’m possessed by a Martian. Send help. Golly. But that’s the whole point. Where’s the… You realize that that’s one of the reasons why this has to be done, correct? Correct. these executive orders and it’s for people who entered the country illegally. Would you allow someone to enter your home illegally without your knowledge? I mean, if you’re not okay with that, then you should feel the same about the border. If you think the border should be open, but your house shouldn’t be open, you’re a racist hypocrite. You are. That’s just like how these people operate. They only want border towns to deal with this. They only want other Hispanic families to deal with this. It’s that they also don’t realize the people who are disproportionately affected by the crime that stems from illegal immigration are Hispanic communities. Jocelyn Hungary, she wasn’t a blonde-headed, blue-eyed Connecticut resident. You know what I mean? It’s sad. Where’s the protection for those women, those girls? No, we got Selena Gomez up here who would love to make money off them, by the way. She would love to sell them a trinket or a Made in China concert T-shirt or something, maybe like a direct-to-DVD or direct-to-streaming thing that she’s in. She would love to sell them that. But that’s where the concern stops. I just, that’s disgusting. Achieving vibrant youthful skin doesn’t have to be complicated. With the power of Native Path Collagen, you can nourish your body from within and enhance not just your skin, but also your hair, your nails. 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And now all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s quick five.
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I have to tell you, I thought this was funny, this quick headline here that I have. I don’t have it on the rundown, but it says that millennials and Gen X, they’re actually more interested in sharing their wealth with their heirs now, and boomers want to wait until they’re dead. It was a survey that was done by Charles Schwab, and it says that millennials and Gen Xers want to transfer wealth to the next generation while they’re living. Baby boomers are like, nope, we’re going to wait until we’re dead. That’s a very interesting generational divide. I don’t know how I feel. I don’t know where I am on that. Like, I don’t know. I don’t know. It’s just, yeah. So, all right, moving on, moving on. Let’s see here. This, of course, that’s not going to pull up. Of course, it’s not. It’s, oh, okay, here we go. So the, let’s see this. Sorry, give me a moment. Ooh, tuberculosis in Kansas. This outbreak is now the largest in recorded history for the United States. This is, according to local press there, they’re dealing with That’s actually not the peak of Capital Journal. Ongoing tuberculosis outbreak in Kansas has become the largest in the recorded history of the United States. They’re saying that they’re dealing with this epidemic. And moving from there, nothing wants to open. You know what? I might actually, if this can’t open, I might actually cut to break a little earlier because this is a little crazy. We’re having major tech issues. Bear with us. Elementary school student goes permanently blind because they ate too many chicken nuggets. I don’t even know how that happens. How do you go? You’re not supposed to eat them with your eyes. You don’t stick them in your eyeballs. This is in Malaysia. A child went permanently blind. They said it was overall due to an unhealthy diet. But they said that the kid went blind because he ate too many tendies. Sure, I’ll believe it. I don’t care. Let’s see. Crime lab analyst altered DNA evidence in hundreds of cases, according to prosecutors. This is a piece that’s over at MSN, which brings, I mean, again, more questions about the different tiers of justice and the consistency of good justice in our system. This was in the Colorado Bureau of Investigations where they found this. Stick with us. We’ve got more in store. Brazil slammed the U.S. after dozens of deportees arrived in handcuffs. Am I supposed to feel like upset about that or something? Am I supposed to? I don’t know. Am I? The Brazil’s very upset. They were very upset with the United States. They expressed outrage on Saturday after dozens of immigrants deported arrived in handcuffs. They said it was a flagrant disregard for their rights. No, no, no. Hold up. Hold up here, muchacho. Number one, you don’t have rights when you come into this country illegally. You don’t have them. And if you’re in this country illegally, you don’t have rights. You don’t. Don’t act like you do. You don’t get forced into conscription. You don’t have to deal with that. You don’t have to do jury duty. You don’t have to pay the property taxes that we all pay. You don’t have to do a number of things that American citizens are forced to do that you don’t as someone who’s in the country illegally. So hell no, you have no rights. Become a citizen. Do it the right way. Get here legally. You know what? They are lucky they didn’t get their ass beat and that they didn’t have their shirts pulled over their heads and they weren’t left like the cartels usually leave them. How about that? Is that where we got to go with this? I’m totally fine with it, by the way. I’m all about going full on Vlad Dracul. You just let me know how we do this. I’ll match your energy. I feel like that’s something that you could say in the United States actually will. Brazilian authorities were, they were, oh, they were so distraught, you guys. Immediately remove the handcuffs, they said dramatically. The Justice Minister, Ricardo Lewandowski. Lewandowski, very Brazilian name. He says, the flagrant disregard for the fundamental rights of Brazilian citizens. What rights do you have in the United States as a Brazilian citizen when you illegally enter? It’s a rhetorical because the answer is none. None. You have none. Brazil will request explanations from the U.S. government. Do you know what I would do? You know what I would do? We’ve got copier machines, right, still? Yeah. Yeah, I would either – what I would probably do is hold my middle finger up to the glass and I would Xerox that and then send it off to Brazil. But I would do it like on presidential paper with a seal.
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If they ask for, you know, like leaflets out of the plane, just drop.
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Yeah. Here’s our explanation. And it’s just Xerox of my middle finger. That’s what I would do. I feel like Trump. This actually is where he probably will beat me in terms of classing it up because he probably won’t do that. Probably it would be based if he did.
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Seems inexpensive.
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I mean, I would I would literally enter their country illegally to get one of those leaflets and then bring it back to the United States so I could have it as a keepsake. That’s how much I want this to happen. But again, I don’t get everything I want. It’s all right. But they’re demanding explanations. Listen to the language. The degrading treatment of passengers. Bitch, they enter the country illegally. I’m not apologizing for my Portuguese on this, by the way. You know what that word means. It means sir or ma’am when I say it like that. They said that there were 88 Brazilians aboard the aircraft. They were very upset. And they were like, they didn’t give us water. They didn’t give us food. Oh, my gosh. You mean you weren’t able to get a T-bone steak cooked to your specifications and a cocktail on the plane, the free plane ride that you got after you broke into our country? Wow. Wow. How would you treat someone who broke up into your house, who busted up into your house without your permission? How would you do? How would you treat that person? Do they have rights in your home? What do they contribute to your house? Do they got rights in your home? It’s a serious question because some people think that the border and that are two different things and they are not. They try to act like they are because they can’t hold up their argument for the border. So they, yeah, they were already, maybe they’ll learn their lesson. Don’t enter illegally. And you don’t have that happen to you. Wow. You know, that one audio soundbite that I always make fun of came this year is all about like realizing stuff. And me and my friends are just like realizing things. Maybe all these people that entered the country illegally are going to start. I don’t know, like realizing stuff. And it’s like the year of realizing things. Maybe that’ll happen for them. Maybe. But I want more of this. I like this. This is how I bet. I guarantee you they’re going to think twice, though. These 88 people, don’t you think so? Guaranteed.
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Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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