Join us in this episode as Dana Lash takes you on a wild ride through some of the most bizarre stories and thought-provoking commentary. From the antics of Florida Man returning a stolen car for unexpected reasons, to uncovering the hidden security flaws at The Louvre, expect to be entertained and informed. There’s plenty of laughter to be had as Orwellian internet myths fall apart before our eyes, and the show’s political discourse challenges listeners’ perspectives on civil responsibility and emotional intelligence.
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SPEAKER 16 :
Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.
SPEAKER 05 :
It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
SPEAKER 10 :
Man, I got we got some crazy headlines. This one, though. I mean, the guy committed a crime. And I’m tempted to say no, but he did bring the car back that he stole because there was a kid in it. So a Florida man was accused of stealing a vehicle at a gas station and then he immediately returned it once he discovered there was a child inside. Fifty three year old William Mullis was arrested after he stole a car at a gas station in Brevard County. There’s surveillance footage of it. There’s no question. There was a one year old in the backseat while the owner went inside the convenience store, I guess, to pay. He seemed throwing the car in reverse, backing it into the parking lot. as the mother who drove the car rushes to the driver’s side door. He was seen fleeing the area on foot, later arrested. He’s behind bars with no bond. It’s not worth it, parents. Take him inside. It is not worth it. It is not worth it. It is not worth it. It is not worth it. I cannot say it enough. We do not live in the world that we lived in 40-whatever years ago when your parents could do it. It’s not the same. You can’t do that. Also, let’s see here. Oh, my gosh. I don’t want to read the dog one. Yeah.
SPEAKER 06 :
I know about the guy. The deed was done last year.
SPEAKER 10 :
So, so you guys are, Oh gosh, I can’t even stand. Uh, they passed a lot of laws in Florida about this. You remember the sweet pop that was tied to a fence to drown. He was abandoned during a hurricane during hurricane Milton. Remember the guy was cleared. The guy accused of doing it was cleared of charges. Um, I he should never be allowed to own an animal again. He child. He tied this Giovanni Garcia’s third degree felony charge was thrown out when they said they didn’t have enough sufficient evidence to verify that he was responsible. You got to be kidding me. It was a bull terrier pup. The truck. The pup’s name was Trooper. He was barking desperately for help. He was in stomach water, stomach deep water. Hurricane Milton was dumping tons of rain. He was saved, thank heavens, and rehomed. But the guy who did it, you can’t. You’ve got to be kidding me. Oh, my gosh. Fates, do your thing, man. Do your thing. That’s just horrible. Let’s talk about the Florida man who was dubbed the Cuban Tarzan who said he caught a record-sized iguana. I love this. Oh, my gosh. They have a real iguana problem down there because I guess people got them as pets and then they let them loose and now they’ve got to round them up. Florida man who goes by the nickname literally of Cuban Tarzan. He apparently got one of the biggest iguanas ever seen in the state. Miami New Times says Andrew Morales, who tracks, that’s his job, he tracks and removes the animals. It is the length of his body. This guy’s over six feet. It legit looks like a Godzilla. Florida Fish and Wildlife confirmed that they can reach five feet in length and weigh up to 17 pounds. This thing looks like it’s about 17 pounds. That it’s pretty, that’s pretty crazy. Uh, man alive. That’s something else. Uh, also let’s see here. I got a couple of other ones. A, um, We also have the Florida man who was arrested for online threats against his employer, Amazon. That’s never a smart thing to do anything like that. And they have they have some very they have some. This was under the Rick Scott regime. They have laws on that stuff, particularly Florida enhancement for charges, things like that, that relates to threats online. America’s tap water is a cocktail of heavy metals and toxins, the result of corroded pipes that we should have replaced decades ago. Let me just ask anybody in Flint, Michigan. You got lead, heavy metals, rust, basically liquid poison right out the tap. So when I tried Cove Pure on my counter, it was so easy. No plumber, no drilling. You just plug it in and pick your water temperature on the touch screen. And honestly, it actually tastes like water, not like death. So that’s why I use the Cove Pure water purifier to keep my family safe. Unlike the government, Copier actually does its job. Lead in your water doesn’t stop at a gross taste. It can actually cause a host of serious medical issues. But yeah, sure, go ahead, trust the city with your kid’s health. I mean, what could go wrong? Copier’s ClearWave technology removes up to 99.9% of contaminants, so don’t wait for the government to help. Take back control of your family’s health and finally drink water the way that it was meant to be. Visit covepeer.com slash Dana for $200 off. That’s covepeer.com slash Dana.
SPEAKER 11 :
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SPEAKER 12 :
Israeli hostages are released and the war stops in Gaza, but the people who screamed about ending genocide are suddenly silent. Biden administration figures call the Middle East deal bittersweet because they think they deserve the credit. And the shutdown fight highlights what a complete disaster Obamacare is, just like we said it would be. I’m Greg Karambas, inviting you to join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday for the Three Martini Lunch podcast. We’ll give you the top news, some good laughs, and we’ll be done in less than 30 minutes. Follow the Three Martini Lunch on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
SPEAKER 09 :
I think it’s a joke. I looked at the people, they’re not representative of this country. And I looked at all the brand new signs paid for, I guess it was paid for by Soros and other radical left lunatics. It looks like it was, we’re checking it out. The demonstrations were very small, very ineffective, and the people were whacked out. When you look at those people, those are not representative of the people of our country. I mean, think about it. How in the world are you having a no kings protest? If there was a king, you wouldn’t be able to have it, right?
SPEAKER 10 :
I mean, think about monarchy everywhere else. My gosh, if you say something mean in the UK, they come and arrest you. I don’t like what you said on the Twitters, Cain. Oh, going to send the police. Going to send the bobbies to come and get you. Take you away forever. Welcome back to the program. Dana with you. I have no idea what’s happening. It’s fall. It’s not a thousand eleven degrees. So we’re all in a little bit better mood. You don’t realize we slave away for you under these lights. You know, it’s not all like, you know, glitter and kittens. It’s really not. I’m joking. Welcome back. You can also join the chat at Rumble and check us, watch us do the radio show channel 347 DirecTV. But yeah, the no Kings thing, I didn’t have anything interrupted this weekend, Cain. Most of it was legal study because I’ve got a debate coming up. And then I did partake of a bit of Oktoberfest per my husband’s German heritage because he has to wear the hat and the whole. He does the whole. He’s very German.
SPEAKER 06 :
I had chicken wings and watched football. Nothing was interrupted.
SPEAKER 10 :
I had schnitzel and strudel and a bunch of other things.
SPEAKER 06 :
And I’m jealous.
SPEAKER 10 :
Yeah, all the German carbs, all of them. And then an ACDC cover band because, you know, it’s Texas. God bless America. But I didn’t see any No King’s stuff. I don’t even think I saw anybody with blue hair. Did you have any activities interrupted by No King’s stuff, Cain?
SPEAKER 06 :
No, not at all.
SPEAKER 10 :
Steve, I’m curious. You’re out there on the eastern seaboard in the armpit of America in D.C. Beautiful architecture there. Did you have any of your weekend activities interrupted by any multiple colored hair people in the streets?
SPEAKER 15 :
I went golfing in the morning, so I was able to get out of there before it started and I stayed out of it.
SPEAKER 10 :
Look at you. Smart man. Smart. It’s like also the most East Coast thing I think I’ve ever heard. I was golfing in the morning. Just stayed away from the protest till till then. Smart. Yeah, I didn’t see. Apparently they were out and about. I did see some photos. We do have some video. There’s one video and I’m going to work and we’re going to switch here and get into some of this other stuff, too. But I wanted to call out where. Oh, goodness. It was the one. we have a million of them we have a lot of really good audio today it’s like 11 to cut 11 million thousand cane uh but it’s the i guess they’re not into gun control anymore because they were talking about shooting people i’m not kidding they were talking about that uh and then you also had yeah this is this is audio soundbite 23 this is in seattle so the no kings guy he’s talking about killing people already can they go for a day without obsessing over killing people listen
SPEAKER 03 :
Who are you going to kill? Nazis. Who do you define as a Nazi? What do you mean? In this context, who’s a Nazi? Stephen Miller’s a Nazi. So you’re going to kill Stephen Miller? If I had a chance, yeah, I would. I don’t know if that’s something I’d say on camera, bro.
SPEAKER 10 :
There’s the picnic blanket lady. Wow. You know why they say this stuff on camera and they don’t care? Because they haven’t been able to be touched until now. Because there was no accountability in law and order. There was none of it. No accountability. I mean, my gosh, you had leftists burning down churches in D.C. and people got wrists slapped. I tweeted out one over the weekend as well where someone was talking about shooting someone else. I think it was like Portland or Seattle. I had reposted it on X and it’s a video of a guy saying, talking about you got to get a gun and go and start killing. I mean, I’m not kidding. This is some of the stuff that they were talking about at these things. It’s wild. 24, cut 24. This lady had no idea, no idea what she was talking about. This is some Kamala Harris word salad level. Check this.
SPEAKER 04 :
So what brings you out today?
SPEAKER 17 :
No King’s Day.
SPEAKER 04 :
And why specifically are you out supporting no King’s Day?
SPEAKER 17 :
I think protest is important.
SPEAKER 04 :
Why are you protesting?
SPEAKER 17 :
How much time do you have?
SPEAKER 04 :
A couple minutes. What’s the main reason you’re out here protesting President Trump?
SPEAKER 17 :
I don’t agree with a lot of the decisions that are being made.
SPEAKER 04 :
Is there any decision in particular you disagree with?
SPEAKER 17 :
Okay, so I would start with… Yeah. Well… Yeah. I don’t even think it’s appropriate for me to have this interview. Wow.
SPEAKER 10 :
What? Because you don’t know what you’re talking about? In Chicago, they had. Sorry, this was in Chicago. I put this in. I had tweeted this over the weekend where they had one of the one of the leaders, one of the activists speaking in front of him. He said, you got to grab a gun and you got to turn guns on the fascist system. I mean, can we have a day without liberal violence? No, no. Do we have this? Go ahead and place. This is rough. Listen.
SPEAKER 13 :
You got to grab a gun. We got to turn around the guns on this fascist system. These ice Asians got to get shot and wiped out.
SPEAKER 10 :
Wow. So wait, I got a question. So that was in Chicago. So they’re not for gun control anymore. Oh, interesting. Oh, what? OK. Yeah. All right. I see what you’re saying. Violent. I really I really feel like leftist always. I don’t know. I mean, when they tell you that they want you dead, you need to believe them, guys. You need to believe them. I’m just saying this is how the left has always been for forever with this stuff. Oh, my gosh. There’s more, though, too. We got so much. Then there’s audio. This is cut 29. A No Kings protester with a Mexican flag. Watch what she does with here. This is cut 29. classy. Just disgusting. I have never and I have some people on the right that get mad at me because when I get mad, there’s no going back. It takes a lot to get me really enraged, like truly enraged. I’ve never been so angry that I or unreasonable or without ration that I thought that The only way that I could be clearly heard was through violence. And I have never been, I can separate a person from a political belief unless they want to disarm me and then it’s on. If you disagree with me on taxation, you’re horribly mathematically illiterate, but that’s okay. You know, I’ll pray for you. If you disagree with me on things like EVs or, you know, a number of domestic policy issues, I just do not feel whatever they feel that… gets me wound up to a point where I would behave that way. When you lose control, think about this. People who lose control of their emotions are weak. Now, that’s not to say you should be a robot and never demonstrate or exhibit any kind of emotional empathy at all. But people who lose their cool like this are weak. Acting with emotion like that is not a sign of strength. It’s a lack of complete self-discipline. It is a weakness. It’s sad. I see a lot of very weak, like personal constitution, weak people. People who are not as educated as they want you to think. People who want to be taken care of. They want to be coddled. Weakness. It’s our friends over at Kel-Tec, the KS7 Gen 2 shotgun. You guys are familiar with Kel-Tec. It’s one of the latest in evolution for home defense, and it’s the K7 Gen 2, packed with upgrades. You’ve got a five-slot Picatinny-style accessory rail. You can add grips underneath lights, keep it flush and sleek with a cap. It’s a smoother pump action. for a faster, cleaner cycling. Plus you got enhanced durability. All of the original KS7 advantages are still there. Ultra lightweight at just under seven pounds unloaded. Compact bullpup design. You got maneuverability in tight spaces, ambidextrous downward shell ejection, seven plus one capacity as well. It’s a go-to for home defense, but good for range days. And you know, anywhere in between works well for both season shooters and first timers. It’s the KS7 It’s the Gen 2. Also check out the Defender package as well. MSRP is just $639, so it’s well within accessibility range. It’s from Kel-Tec.
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SPEAKER 05 :
And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
SPEAKER 10 :
I have questions. New York City Wikipedia conference was halted when a, quote, non-offending pedophile, end quote, stormed the stage and pointed the gun at his own head.
SPEAKER 06 :
That’s oxymoronic.
SPEAKER 10 :
Yeah. Connor Weston, 27, apparently had a revolver and he said, I’m a non-contact pedophile. They had a wiki conference staff had to tackle and disarm him. He was taken into custody. Uh, What is non-offending? Don’t even. Stop it. I honestly think some people are like, I’m going to be transparent and say this kind of stuff because they’re as a tactic to mainstream this depravity. It’s really what it is. Let’s see. Poor seniors are dying up to nine years sooner than the wealthier ones. And then USA Today is like, how to not be one of them. Make money. I know. You know, a lot of it is about preventative care, too. And I feel like the article really glosses over that in favor of establishing a narrative that’s very Marxist in terms of cash flow. But I digress. Your lawn wants you to mow your fall leaves, says an expert. They’re saying put down the rake. They said that the tedious chore of raking leaves, don’t do it, and you can just mow them into your yard. I don’t know. Yeah, it is. I don’t know why people don’t do that anyway. That’s always been a big thing with, like, my folks.
SPEAKER 06 :
You have decent healthy lawn the next year, too.
SPEAKER 10 :
Yeah, I mean, you know, true point. Also, six… Oh, I don’t even know what this is. I will… One of the things we are going to talk about later, though… And I’ll play the video later. A whale shark reached the shores of Gaza. I didn’t know all about the whale shark thing. They’re like apparently very rare. And apparently this whale shark, it got close to the Gazan shore. It’s very rare. It’s a symbol of wonder, all this kind of stuff. And it took the Gazans like 20 minutes to pull it out of the water and beat it to death. It’s on video. Actually, should we play the video? Do we have a second? We should maybe. Yeah, we got it. It’s cut $11,000. It’s actually cut $43,000. Yeah, this is what we’re talking about. Pulled out of the sea by fishermen and then this happened. So it’s totally dead. It’s like a wonder of the world. Some people were saying that they don’t know if it was hunted or if it was pulled ashore. Regardless, it was butchered apparently and there’s a lot of reactions to it. It’s an endangered whale shark. And they’re not normally near the coast in the Mediterranean, near the coast of Israel or Gaza. And it’s like, you know, largest fish in the world, basically. So there. That’s kind of sad. It finally goes up. It’s not Jaws. It’s, you know, people. Dun it. Dun it. Oh, no, you’re in the shores. You’re near the shallows of the Mediterranean. Go the other way. Can we talk about the Louvre for a moment? Oh, man. I just… Who’s in charge of security over there? Who does that?
SPEAKER 06 :
Pink Panther?
SPEAKER 10 :
Apparently. It gets crazier. So the alarm, I don’t know if you, this is wild. The alarm for the Louvre. that connected the window doors. So the burglars, if you are not following the story, literally in broad daylight in the span of four minutes, a group of thieves came in 270 yards from the Mona Lisa and stole all of these like jewels that were in Napoleon’s family, right? Stole all of these like super expensive jewels and the loops closed. They rode a basket lift up the outside of it Forced to open a window, got in there, smashed the display cases, and then they fled with all this fancy stuff, right? They got all kind of stuff that they stole, jewels that, you know, were going to be just broken up and immediately just parsed out. They, 8,708 diamonds, 34 sapphires, 38 emeralds, and 212 pearls stolen. The pearl and diamond tiara came of Empress Eugenie. The large diamond corsage bow. The brooch known as the reliquary of Empress Eugenie. Emerald necklace from the Marie-Louise Paru. And then you had a whole bunch of other stuff. Wow. They got the crown. They dropped a crown on their way out and it was damaged. A lot of these, they said, are, they can’t even estimate how valuable they are. And they said they’re all unsellable because they’re world renowned. So they’re going to have to destroy all of these pieces and resell the stones. That’s what they’re doing. Because you can’t just like resell like the necklace. Everyone’s going to know it’s been stolen. This is going to be a lot of money. What gets me is how in the world this was able to happen. So this is what the Louvre, this is the actual museum. This is what they said. They tweeted this today. After the robbery that the Louvre suffered yesterday, the museum regrets to inform you that it will remain closed to the public today. Visitors who have already booked their tickets will be refunded. after the robbery came you mean the robbery in which someone literally got into a basket like a group of kittens and were hauled up the side of the louvre and then they busted in a window like in front of everybody but they were all in high vis vests apparently and what is it does that if you see somebody in a high vis vest are you just like oh that person’s official That’s an official person doing official business. They’re doing official stuff. I am fascinated by this stuff. It is one of the funniest. I mean, it’s I don’t think they’re ever going to get any of these jewels back. But I mean, guys, they got in a basket and they hauled it up old style up the side of the building. What in the world? And no one saw it. No one saw. Now, some people were saying that like the story, the alarm that was connected, it had been out of service. Apparently, they turned off the alarm on the little window door because of repeated false triggers came. Oh, so the burglars knew that it wasn’t working.
SPEAKER 06 :
So don’t fix the triggers. Just leave the alarm off.
SPEAKER 10 :
Yeah. Oh, no. We should not fix what is triggering the alarm. We should… Oh, no, no. We should leave the alarm off. Let’s go get a baguette. Oh, instead of fixing it, let’s just unplug it. I don’t know. I got… I think that there was an inside job. I think that somebody on the inside was working with them. Because how do you not… I’m just… I don’t know. I don’t know, man. So they I guess it’s still closed today. The Louvre. But that’s a lot of jewels. That is some real. Yeah. You know that meme? I don’t know if you guys have seen this before. It is a meme of a door lock, like one of the latch locks. But instead of the metal latch, there’s a Cheeto in place. This is like the security of the Louvre, apparently. Oh, no, no. Just don’t fix it. Just put that cheeto. Oh, the cheeto will keep all the people. Oh, wee, wee. That’s, I don’t know, man. But why is it so closed, though? I’m curious. Like, that’s a pretty big thing.
SPEAKER 16 :
Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
SPEAKER 01 :
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This was super interesting, and especially to see that everything can lead to something else, like how cooking led you to be, you know, the founder, the president of a business, and even like your activities in high school, middle school, like led to this moment.
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Adeline, what are you looking to do with the rest of your life? Do you have a sense of that?
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SPEAKER 12 :
Brett, somebody that’s interested in languages and music, you think there’s any hope for them? Oh, my gosh.
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I mean, in our world today, everybody speaks different languages and they work with people that speak different languages, have different cultures. That’s great.
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Absurd Truth: The Craziest “No Kings” Moments
Join us in this episode as Dana Lash takes you on a wild ride through some of the most bizarre stories and thought-provoking commentary. From the antics of Florida Man returning a stolen car for unexpected reasons, to uncovering the hidden security flaws at The Louvre, expect to be entertained and informed. There’s plenty of laughter to be had as Orwellian internet myths fall apart before our eyes, and the show’s political discourse challenges listeners’ perspectives on civil responsibility and emotional intelligence.
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