Dive into the latest episode where we unravel bizarre Florida Man stories that will have you questioning your own decisions. From reckless teens playing with fire to outrageous antics involving invasive iguanas at a local pizzeria, we delve into the absurdities of these Sunshine State adventures. Shift gears as we discuss the complexities of identity in sports, specifically focusing on gender controversies in the Olympic arena.
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Make sure you’re following the podcast so you never miss an episode, especially when the news gets crazy. And while you’re there, leave a quick rating and review. It helps us get this show in front of more people who need some sanity in their day.
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Dana Lash’s absurd truth podcast.
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It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
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This is why you don’t play with fire like ever. It’s not a toy. Can’t believe I have to say this. A Florida man. Well, Florida teens played with fire. Friend got burnt. Now there’s a felony charge. A 17 year old set his friend on fire. Now he’s arrested and faces felony aggravated battery. Dudes. It’s dudes. Yes, of course. They’re boys. Bradley Ming faces a felony charge. He set his friend on fire. Marin County Sheriff said that he deliberately poured gas on a teen and then ignited it. That’ll do it. That’ll do it. And he got severe burns. Victim was in the hospital. Second degree burns. The… There was a video that showed exactly what happened. He poured gasoline, created a flammable trail leading right to the victim and then flames. You know, the guy tried to jump into a lake. He got treatment for his injuries. They tried to downplay what happened. So he’s in jail without bond. Don’t be stupid. That sounds like bullying and not something a friend would do. If I’m being a Karen causes a scene because somebody wouldn’t move their cart. described as all progressive boomers be progressive boomerin. So a Florida man got into a fight with a Karen because she demanded that he move his cart. The video began with the staff being called over. The woman said she wanted the man to move his cart. He refused. He said she was minding. So they’re in an aisle. This is the stupidest, pettiest thing I’ve ever seen. Stop being horrible meat sacks. Stop it. So she’s got her cart. He I don’t know what she said. She had asked him to step aside. The man said the woman was rude. He she she just admitted that he move and didn’t say excuse me. All of this is so dumb. And they went back and forth. And the woman clearly is the aggressor. But it’s like, if you just want to get it over with, get out of the way. Or if you have the time to mess around, then don’t. Which apparently this guy had all the time in the world, so he didn’t move. I don’t know. It does bother me. Does it bother you if someone tries to get by you and they don’t say excuse me?
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Not so much. I don’t really care too much about that. It doesn’t bother me.
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I just don’t like it when people stand there. Like if I’m looking at something in the aisle and I’m supposed to guess what’s going on in their mind because I’m not paying attention to them. I’m like looking at something and they stand there.
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Right.
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And. I don’t know. It’s like, use your words. You know what I’m saying? I don’t know. Let’s see. I got to do this one because I don’t understand this headline, actually. This headline… Okay, there’s a lot here. So this… Florida woman apparently got arrested because of her behavior at the Walmart self-checkout where she was pretending to be a police officer. And then she had her taser out and ready. And then an elderly woman against an elderly woman in a motorized scooter or something. And then there were racist remarks. I don’t know. This lady, though, is crazy. And I just need everyone to see her mugshot. Because her mugshot is something else. 75-year-old Florida woman. She… had a taser and claimed to be a cop as she intervened in a walmart self-checkout fight to defend okay she’s defending a senior in a scooter a scooter senior defending but the witnesses say the senior the scooter senior was making racist remarks to the other customer i don’t even know this is so stupid i can’t believe this And then at one point she pulled out a black taser from her purse, pointed it at the victim and the mother and said, stop, I’m a police officer. She was not, in fact, a police officer. And there’s surveillance footage of all of it. And she got in trouble for it. So she actually, because she displayed a weapon, technically, she got charges of aggravated assault with intent to commit a felony and impersonated a law enforcement officer. She was booked in Broward County and she was released. Oh, my gosh. Just all of these stories. are examples of what happens when you don’t just go on living in your life and you just don’t get around it. You know what I mean? Just don’t. I can’t, man. And if you’re in a scooter, you have no business getting involved in a fight with nobody else. Okay? Just don’t right there. Just stop it right there. Let’s see. Oh, gross. A Florida man is bringing his invasive lizards, the iguanas, to a pizzeria. It’s a big thing down there. Now they’re having iguana pizza. I’ll pass on that one. I heard it’s like the chicken of the trees. I get what you’re saying. During the holidays, it’s easy for all the healthy habits to go out the window. Desserts, late nights, you name it. But now that the new year has begun, I have one easy suggestion to get you back on track, and it starts with Cove Pure. Everyone runs to new supplements, diets, and workouts, but ignores the most basic thing, water. Even mild dehydration hurts your energy, your focus, and metabolism. And with all the garbage in tap water, you’re starting behind before you even begin. Cove Pure fixes that. Their ClearWave Reverse Osmosis Tech removes up to 99.9% of contaminants, PFAs, microplastics, pharmaceutical residue, fluoride, heavy metals. So you’re just drinking water, which is why we love it. And you can pick hot, cold, or warm water at the touch of a button and use size presets like 16 ounces to make hitting your water goals simple. It sits on your countertop, no installation or plumber needed. I have mine in my studio and my team uses it every day. Make a New Year’s resolution that sticks. Improve your health with Cove Pure. Get $200 off for a limited time when you use my link today. covepure.com slash Dana. That’s C-O-V-E-P-U-R-E dot com slash Dana.
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Listen as students and young adults interview well-respected CEOs on our national radio show, realworldleaders.org. to learn secrets for success and how to use them to propel their careers.
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I think it was really inspiring how Mr. Levin just keeps on wanting to grow and learn more from the people around him, his peers and his advisor, his father even.
SPEAKER 06 :
Anya, how do you want to grow?
SPEAKER 02 :
Well, I’m also trying to grow my communications. I just became the communications chair of my school’s TA, student government.
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Hey, Brett, this thing about communication, how important is that? And how important is for Anya to continue to develop these communication skills?
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It’s so important. And I think today, as kids, you have your cell phones in your hands all the time and learn how to look people in the eye, publicly speak and talk to people.
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To hear more and to help us introduce your high school, GED, work-ready, and college students to our CEOs, visit our website at realworldleaders.org. That’s realworldleaders.org.
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Oh, why hello, radio listeners. Tis I, Dana Lash. You ready for story time? We’re at the top of the second hour. You can find us on Substack, Chapter and Verse, YouTube, Facebook. I tell you to go to the chat, but it’s on a platform that suppresses us. So it’s true. It’s on Bull Ray. But all the good people are hanging out there. All right. So the Olympics. I’m not watching. I don’t know when I stopped. It used to be a thing I used to enjoy, but then everything got so political and stupid that it made everything unenjoyable. And I just kind of threw that in with it. And then you had all the dudes who want to be ladies who got involved. I saw this for I have two stories for you. One of them. Oh, boy. One of them is that is going to be really difficult to discuss. The other is this Algerian. You remember the Algerian Olympic boxer? What does he go by? Iman. Iman. Iman. Keef. Keef. All right. Woman. Woman. Woman. She gave, or he gave, sorry, an interview with French sports outlet L’Equipe. And I’m a man, Khalif, confirmed that he had the SRY gene that’s carried on a Y chromosome. So everyone’s like, can you believe he admitted finally that he’s a man? He needed to admit a man before you went, oh, well, that made sense. Really? What gave it away? The giant Adam’s apple or the other giant Adam’s apple? What gave it away? The fact that he’s like 6’2″? What gave it away? The fact that he talks like this?
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Excuse me, it’s man. It is man.
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I mean, what gave it away? I’m curious. They were allowing him, the Olympic Committee, to continue boxing in one woman’s category where he ultimately took gold. And that was the International Boxing Association. He failed a sex test. Well… It’s very easy to see. Pull down them britches. We don’t have to sit here and do all the blood tests and all this stuff. Pull down them britches. That’s what we’re going to do. We’re doing it the old-fashioned way here. I’m a man, Khalif. That’s what we’re doing. Why was this a big thing? Multiple leaked medical reports. Dude, you know there’s one easy way to check, right?
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Just saying. I didn’t need to check.
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I mean, I could look and be like, that’s a man.
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Yeah, that’s all I needed.
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What gave it away? Hello, it’s me, a woman. What gave it away? Good night. She’s an idiot.
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Well, she’s a guy, so…
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Oh, my word. And he failed all these chromosome tests. And they and then the IBA said that they had been barred from releasing them by the Algerian Olympic Committee. I think Algeria needs to be yeeted out of competition. No, this is a woman. See, it’s a woman. He wears the lipstick. It’s a woman. No, it’s a man. His name’s I’m a man, Khalif. Let’s be real. So. The Algerian Olympic Committee was trying to hide all this because we knew it was a dude. They thought you were stupid. They thought they could bring out this six-foot-two dude with a package and an Adam’s apple, deep voice and facial hair, and be like, no, that’s a woman. There’s a lady. It’s a female woman. That’s… No, not. So he failed all these tests. Now he’s finally admitting, yeah, I had this gene order. You’re a dude. Stop doing it. Just you’re a dude with a weenus. You’re a dude. Stop. Why is it so? Why do we have to go? Well, all these chromosomes. You’re a dude. You look like a dude. You talk like a dude. You have bumps where dudes have bumps. You’re a dude. That’s it. It’s not difficult. Oh, my gosh. I just I wouldn’t want to compete in any organization that’s confused about this. Also confusing. You need to know this because I had to read it. It’s one of those. I don’t understand. I’m not even going to pretend that I understand how this would work. Not even going to. So this started trending last night. And it’s in The New York Times. Would you like to hear the headline? Oh, it’s OK, because Juan’s just going to put up the tweet. That’s OK. Go ahead and hit us. So reports have surfaced before the Winter Olympics that alleged ski jumpers are injecting their wings with hyaluronic acid to fly farther. The World Anti-Doping Agency has vowed to investigate the erection. Like a squirrel? Like, I don’t. I don’t understand how that… Now, the New York Times admits it’s a lurid claim, but they’re writing about it anyway. It’s the International Bobsleigh and Skeleton Federation. I just have to stop right there.
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Wait, Cain, write down the Skeleton Federation for a band name.
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That’s an accent. We’re stopping everything right now. I know it’s like some kind of Swiss sport, isn’t it? That’s when you go head first down the hill or something like that, and they call it skeleton or something. I don’t know. And that’s what a toboggan is. It’s called the skeleton. I don’t care. I just got an amazing view of skeletons on a sleigh, and it’s amazing. Skeletons on Bob Said’s ring, making spirits bright. So it’s the… International Bobsleigh and Skeleton Federation. They’re banning the new helmets Britain wanted to wear because of aerodynamic ridges. But then apparently things went to a new level because ski jumpers are allegedly injecting their male copulatory organs with hyaluronic acid to fly a little bit further. The claims were reported in German newspaper Bild and Now, the New York Times does say, now hold up. Yes, there’s some science here. There’s a little bit of science that backs this up just enough to make this a story.
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I’d love to hear this.
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So, okay.
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How are we doing this?
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The science is that if you inject the copulatory organ with the hyaluronic acid, it increases the size and gives ski jumpers bigger genitalia at the point that their suits are measured by 3D scanners. The temporarily enhanced measurements would theoretically mean athletes are given a bigger, looser suit, like a sail catching the wind, and would allow them to make longer jumps. I’m glad that they explained this because I was thinking, isn’t that stuff packed away when you’re doing the jump? Like, it doesn’t deploy like a parachute. So, the Build newspaper quoted this guy saying, yeah, it is possible to achieve a temporary visual thickening of the organ by injecting paraffin or hyaluronic acid. Paraffin?
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Good God.
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I don’t want to win anything that bad. No. Now, they haven’t accused any specific athletes of But WADA, that’s the bobsleigh skeleton people, they found us. This gets weird. It’s like a mad lib of what? They said, we’ll have presented with evidence of wrongdoing. We are going to investigate.
SPEAKER 08 :
Is that considered doping then, if that’s what you’re doing? If you’re injecting your thing?
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I mean, it’s temporary, and it just gives you a bigger suit.
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So is it considered doping, though?
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Who are the people who have to use a 3D scanner to measure the suit? Wow, these people this year have come in with some larger packages. I just don’t… Man, you have to be really dedicated to the win. There’s nothing. So they have no proof. It’s just a hunch. Well, what makes them think that this is happening? Who had to get a bigger suit? That’s what they should be looking at. And why do you care? Who cares? It’s all about getting the… Oh, man. Oh, I’m not even reading the chat’s comments. I’m not even doing this.
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Have they measured the advantage? Like, you know, let’s say that someone got a suit and didn’t inject their thing with hyaluronic acid. And then someone did. And then the difference between the two.
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It’s like a whole new term for catfishing.
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What is the measurable advantage?
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You get a bigger super suit, I guess. Oh, I know.
SPEAKER 08 :
Yeah, but what does it end up like? You get extra two yards in the flight? Like what’s the measurable advantage?
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You’re up for one second longer.
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I’m just trying to figure that out.
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I think that’s it. You’re up for like a second longer. A second? I don’t know. I’m making this up because this isn’t sane. Oh, man. So I guess if you’re a chick, you got two places you can inject then. The people who make it possible are the folks over at Super Beats, the turmeric chews. You guys are very familiar with the turmeric chews. Apparently, some people are confused about the packaging. So the Super Beats packaging is in the… You guys know that it used to be in a white bag with red lettering. Well, now, as companies want to do from time to time… they changed their packaging. So instead of the white bag with the red letters, it’s going to be all red and it has white letters and the formulas are unchanged. And sometimes because they’re phasing out the old packaging, you might see both packages on the shelf simultaneously during the rollout of the new packaging. And so this is the same for the turmeric chews, which are available at Sam’s Club. Standout form of turmeric. Turmeric curcumin complex has higher absorption than conventional turmeric extracts. So your body’s getting more from every serving and tastes like light citrus flavored. No added sugar, no added anything. And it’s easy to take. And you’re going to get the full dose. dose for the lack of a better way to say it of that turmeric curcumin solves the issue of absorbability by the way they do it and you can get it at sam’s club remember there’s white packages and red packages because the red package is the new package design and they’re on the shelves at the same time so it’s the same formula you can find the turmeric chews at sam’s club
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And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
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All right. So first up, chaos. A car crashed into a busy Los Angeles grocery store and three people were killed. Seven people were injured. That’s insane. This whole story. Good night. This is they don’t really know what caused the crash and they don’t know who the driver was. But apparently she also hit a bicyclist before she ran into the store. So, yeah, that’s rough. Minute Maid. has discontinued frozen juice concentrate after 80 years. How are my great aunts going to make their boozy slush every holiday? They said they’re discontinuing their frozen orange juice concentrate in the US and Canada. Actually, I like those. I mean, it’s like literally for the boozy slush, man. Why are we going to do boozy slush? We’ll figure it out. You have to April to grab some cans. I am actually right now going to make a grocery order. Note to self, get some cans for the slush. I’m literally doing this right now. Yeah, you get till April and then it’s gone. Man, I don’t even know. They didn’t say why they were getting rid of it, though. Is it because of Maha stuff? I mean, I don’t care if there’s chemicals in it. It makes great slush. Saying, I don’t care, man. Give me the boozy slush. Sometimes you need that to get through some holidays. All right, so Valentine’s Day spending is going to hit a record $29 billion. I don’t get that. I’ve never been a big Valentine’s person. It’s just kind of weird because it’s performative. That’s why it just feels performative. I just think it’s better if it’s like out of the blue. But, you know, they said that on average, people spend about $200 on gifts anymore at the cost of flowers. It’s like a medium sized bouquet now. It is crazy. So, yeah, you don’t need to go into debt for that stuff. That’s goofy. A Linwood police officer hitched a ride in a pickup truck to catch a stolen bike suspect. That was nice that he did that. He chased down a guy who stole a bike and apparently it looks like he got him. They arrested the suspect. The guy had $30,000 in active warrants. So he has done some stuff in his life. He’s not wasn’t a really good person. Let’s see. When you cut carbs down to zero, I don’t believe this is where I disagree with RFK Jr. He’s touting the keto diet as a cure for schizophrenia. First off, no. And keto only works for certain people. I’m one of the people that doesn’t have enough particular enzyme in my liver to process it, so I can’t do it. I don’t have schizophrenia, though, either. Stick around. We got more in store. I’m not playing the video because I hate giving people who are stupid attention, and I don’t want to shower them with more attention than they deserve. The headline is this. Fired TPUSA staffer rips into Erica Kirk’s leadership team after Charlie’s assassination, saying, quote, it breaks my heart. So this broad who’s a yes, I did say that word cry, a member of the PR team for TPUSA. It sounds like after I because I watched some of her video before my eyes glassed over because I was so completely bored by her own self-importance. is you’re probably bad at PR if you don’t understand why you were let go. So this person, this chick, she worked at TPUSA. She did this 12-minute video basically repeating Gal Sharpton’s accusations. Mockaburr, legitimatize. I mean, I feel like I’m hearing like hood magic, like what in the hell is happening? That’s what it is. It’s a hood spell. I don’t know. It’s true. Legitimatize. Macabre. It’s like when Al Sharpton says Siginori Weaver. How does he say Chipotle? Chipotle. It’s the Sharpton spell. So this chick went on repeating Gal Sharpton’s claims. She said that she was summoned to a meeting and blah, blah, blah. And it’s all conspiracy theory stuff. And She said that she was informed something about a board member had a daughter who was friends with an employee who didn’t like Erica. I don’t even understand. Long story short, she went and was talking smack about her employers, and then she ends up getting fired for talking smack about her employers. And I’m thinking, what is difficult to understand here? Is this some like Zoomer Woffin thing? I went and I talked smack about my boss. Can you believe I was fired for talking smack about my boss? I mean, I only just like suggested that my boss murdered my other boss. What? And then you’re surprised that there would be a consequence for that. That’s like me saying, hey, Cain, Mike and Rich over at Radio America, I think they killed some people. Right? Right? And then Mike and Rich finding out and going, wait, what’s up? Why are you saying this? Yeah, they totally killed some people. Remember? Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. We could get fired for that. You can’t just smack talk your employer and think that you’re still owed a job. You aren’t owed anything. And I have to say this is very bad PR. This is not the way that you would handle it. Especially if you were trying to get even. This is not the way you’d handle it. Because it just puts you in the position of attacking a widow. And that looks bad publicly. So if you’re such a great PR meister, then why did you put yourself in this unfortunate, disadvantageous position? So… And again, it’s like she just repeating Gail Sharpton’s stuff. I still can’t believe people are going on and on. Who would assassinate Charlie Kirk? Who’s going to? I honestly believe the Zoomer Woffin probably killed him now. Let’s just go ahead and go on with that. There’s more evidence that the Zoomer Woffin killed him and the woke Reich killed him than Mossad or anything else. I mean, let’s just go ahead and take the crazy train to its final destination, shall we? Let’s see where this logic of rail goes. It’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. And I don’t know why I honestly I think it’s because people you want me to put my tinfoil hat on. I think that people don’t like the fact that I do think that there is an effort on the right to encourage identity politics like the left does. But then they act like it’s not leftist because they put it in a veneer of rightism. And I do think that TPUSA, they have some really good people there. And then I do think that the organization buddies up to some people that are incredibly questionable. But they’re really trying very hard to do the good thing. And it seems like there are people attacking them for not bending the knee and embracing all of the woke right stuff because it’s all the woke right people that are floating this stuff. It’s all the woke right people that are attacking a widow because It’s all the woke right people that are pushing these conspiracy theories. It’s every thirst thought with an ax to grind that is out there trying to sell this for clicks. I mean, that’s the common denominator here. The idea and selling this stuff. This is what happened after Andrew passed away. There was a lot of and a lot of it was done. You know, a lot of the conspiracy theories were floated by that Nepo baby’s dad on The View, Alyssa Farah. Her dad over at World Net Daily was the guy who pushed that. Oh, Andrew was kill shadowy thing. He was the guy who pushed all that stuff. So you can understand that’s one of the reasons why I dislike Alyssa Farah in case you wanted to know the full story. It’s because she’s a Nepo baby whose dad was a loon. So it’s like the same thing is happening with Charlie and seeing this stuff happen. I also think that you’re a pathetic sack of meat if you’re trying to make life harder for his widow. I don’t give a rat’s backside if you like how his widow is handling stuff. Who are you to sit here and criticize how a widow is dealing with having her husband gunned down in public by a lefty nutjob? And then the left celebrates it. And then you have the woke right that’s attacking you because they want to control your organization. And that’s the truth of it. These people are trying to take control of the organization. I do think that there is some truth to that. And to see this stuff play out like this is stupid. I mean, all of these people, Gal Sharpton and the like, what the hell are these people talking about every single day, whether it’s Tucker Carlson or somebody else? All I see, I’ve never seen anybody so obsessed with talking about Mossad spies and Israeli whatever and pumping that day in and day out. Do they talk about special elections? Hell no. Do they talk about bellwether elections going into midterms or anything that we could do to win in midterms? Hell no. You know why? Because none of these people pushing this stuff have ever been in there at the street level doing the heavy lifting. That’s the truth. A lot of them come from Fox News and they had these cushy, glassy studios and they had a whole staff that did everything from wipe their ass to write their copy. You actually think that some of these people were involved in changing anything on the ground level? Please. They sit up top. And they just commentate. That’s all they do. They’re commentators. They provide. That’s all. That’s all that is. And if they want to fashion themselves into some kind of like conservative activists now, OK, but none of us actual activists ever remember you ever being there in the trenches when it counted. But these are the same people that are all I hear about is, oh, Israel, Israel, Israel, every damn podcast, every damn episode. It’s all they talk about. There is no diverting to any other subject. If they’re not having a giant pleasurable circle with imams from Qatar, then they’re doing this. It’s all I hear. Get new material. Talk about stuff that matters, that’s happening here, that’s affecting what we’re going to be dealing with coming up in midterms. I find it interesting that people get out there and say, well, you can’t talk about this in this country and then be America first. How the hell are you America first talking about buying houses in Qatar and then going after organizations that actually do stuff? It’s a bunch of grifters. I get so tired of it. And yeah, yeah, we’re going to gatekeep because a lot of us busted our asses and put our names on the line and actually did endanger our own safety and are that of our families in order to score a little bit of ground that we are desperately holding on to with no help from these losers. So, yeah, we are going to gatekeep people who threaten that, threaten past victories and threaten past ground gains. Absolutely. And if you don’t gatekeep, then you’re no better than unlocking your door and letting every Tom, Dick and Harry come in. You might as well. I mean, you gatekeep at the border. You gatekeep your baseball team. You gatekeep Super Bowl halftime. Yes, you want good stuff happening. I just I get so tired of this. So, yeah, this broad sits here. I can’t believe I can’t. I talk smack about my employer and I got fired. Wow. Who would have thought about that cause and effect in 2026? Wow. So shocking. Gets tiring. Gets super tiring. But I do think it’s a power play. I think people are trying to get a hold of that organization. That’s really honestly, that’s what it feels like. And it makes me wonder, and Lorraine makes a good point, this was probably the chick that was leaking to Candace, too. This was the chick probably leaking to Gal Sharpton. All for clicks. Is it worth it? I mean, good night. Get some new material. They can’t get new material. Because the moment any kind of controversy with this goes away, Gal Sharpton and everybody else lose their influence. Because they only had influence because of TPUSA to begin with. They lose their influence. Without conspiracy theories, who’s going to click? Who’s going to watch? And that’s the truth of it. They’re not well-read enough to do day-in and day-out stuff, so they do the conspiracy theory stuff. Or maybe they get bought and paid to sit here and promote the virtues of Islamism while attacking Christianity from overseas. Also that. Oh, I don’t give a rat’s backside about being nice to any of these people. None of these people matter in my day-to-day life. It does not affect me if they fall off a cliff tomorrow or they stay topside. I don’t care. None of it affects me because they’ve never done anything but bitch and moan on their podcast. That’s all they do. They’ve never been there when it counts. They like to pretend, but sorry, posting photos of yourself on Instagram and running your mouth in your own little room towards a camera, that’s not enough to do it.
SPEAKER 10 :
Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Absurd Truth: Dana Loesch Reacts To Jeanine Pirro’s Viral Anti-2A Comments