Transitioning from the hilarious to the more intellectually curious, Dana tackles the bewildering world of trans-blindness—a newly emerged identity in the complex spectrum of societal identities. With anecdotes of individuals self-affecting disabilities and the debates surrounding such identities, Dana and her co-host engage in a thought-provoking discussion that is as informative as it is entertaining. The episode caps off with an analysis of Washington D.C.’s divided culinary scene, where politics even dictate the choice of dining ambience.
SPEAKER 02 :
Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.
SPEAKER 03 :
It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
SPEAKER 01 :
So do you guys remember the story that we had of the guy who shot a drone down? Florida Man who shot a drone down above his property and we’re all like, meh. Yeah, so he did. I mean, it was on his property. Well, they’re ordering him to pay $5,000 for shooting down this Walmart delivery drone. He had no idea what it was, but he was tired of this stuff. I mean, he could see it from inside his house and hear it. 72 years old, they demanded that he pay $5,000 in restitution. Oh, I got a way I’d do that. Oh, I definitely got away. I do that. They said that it was in Lake County, Florida, because we were waiting to see if because we had because we were trying to figure out what’s the penalty for shooting. They hadn’t they hadn’t gotten there yet. So Dennis Wynn, they did charge him with multiple offenses. He shot deadly missiles or including shooting deadly missiles into vessels or vehicles and criminal mischief. It’s not a missile. It’s a bullet or whatever. He fired the drone with a nine millimeter. It was a mock delivery operation. And I don’t know. Would I have shot it down like that? I don’t know what his neighborhood’s like, so I can’t pass any judgment.
SPEAKER 03 :
So that’s the cost then, right?
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, that’s the cost, $5,000 for one of these stupid things.
SPEAKER 03 :
So if you’ve got the money to burn.
SPEAKER 01 :
But if it flies, look, I’m going to tell you something. If you’re in a neighborhood where you’re worried about firing off your gun because they’ve got rules on it, get you a long bat. And I’m just saying, if the drone were to fly so low as to be hit by your bat real hard, That’s not your problem. You were out there practicing, right? You were out there practicing with your kids in the yard. Yeah, yeah. And you happened to have your bat and you thought that was a ball, fly ball.
SPEAKER 03 :
All right, hear me out.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 03 :
Flamethrower.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, but what if it has good loot? I mean, I feel like it’s a video game come to life, right? Like, one of our friends was just talking about Borderlands loot and shoot. And I’m like, even though it’s a woke game. But what if it’s like, you know, loot? You know, in COD, they drop you those little welcome packages, those little care boxes. Like, what if it’s like that, you know?
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, I wouldn’t want to shoot it at all. I’d want the care pack.
SPEAKER 01 :
You would want the loot is what I’m saying, right? So I don’t know, man. It’s just the same. So anyway, $5,000. He got in trouble for that. So that’s what you need to know. Stolen AirPods led deputies to a fired Florida man accused of stealing $100,000 in tools from former coworkers. And he stole somebody’s earbuds. Why would you steal somebody’s earbuds? Because they can legit trace it to you. Michael Hohner, he unloaded all these toolboxes into this facility, and he blamed all his coworkers for getting fired. He was let go from his job, and he blamed all his coworkers. So he was arrested for larceny, grand theft, and burglary. That’s what they charged him with. That’s wild. I mean, when you – and the reason they – he was at a storage unit. They caught him at his storage unit because the person who owned the AirPods that he stole, they pinged them. And they found out where he was and they called police. And I don’t, I mean, would they, would he steal my AirPods, arrest him? I don’t even know exactly how that works. But a Florida mayor was arrested for slapping his girlfriend in the face with a cheeseburger in Martin County, Florida. 30-year-old Kyle Jamison Jones and his girlfriend, he didn’t get his way. His girlfriend called the police. He was upset. He apparently woke her up by slapping her in the face with a cheeseburger in And but then he then he pulled her hair and kicked her down the stairs. So he was charged with battery taken to Martin County Jail at Cheeseburger didn’t do anything to you. Yeah, I did not do anything to you at all. Let’s see. A Florida man was denied the use of stranger ground in a dog park shooting. So they rejected this guy’s defense and they set a trial date. Gerald Radford, 66, is charged with second degree murder and a hate crime enhancement, which is stupid. for the shooting death of John Walter Lay. According to Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office, he repeatedly harassed Lay and made derogatory remarks about him and then apparently at a dog park during a struggle, he shot and killed him. So yeah, probably sounds like stand your ground is not a permissible defense for him here or a legitimate one. Just saying, just saying. Florida man robbed an elderly woman and his payback was he got locked in the elevator. It was a knife-wielding Florida man’s robbery of a senior citizen, and he could not make an immediate escape. Broward County sheriffs, they’re still looking for him, but he walked up to a 77-year-old woman, told her to give him her purse, tried to exit the elevator. Doors locked and both inside. That’s awkward. Our partners that help bring you this portion of our program, it’s our friends over at Caltech, the P15. is the lightest, thinnest double stack nine millimeter that’s on the market. And with the lightness, I mean, it’s just so thin. It’s so easily concealable. And there’s two versions. You have the metal version, the metal frame with the walnut wood grip panel, gorgeous. And then you have the polymer version, gator grip texture, tritium fiber optic front side, fully adjustable fiber optic two dot rear, 1.27 inches wide, four inch barrel, lifetime warranty, compact, striker fire. It’s awesome. I mean, this thing is so light and thin. Previously, my 43X was my lightest, thinnest, so ladies if you like to conceal carry you got to have it dudes if you want to be like ultra concealable you got to have a two mag standard capacity one 15 round minimal pinky extension the second 12 rounds double stack mag flush fit you have to check it out it’s the p15 at caltech innovation performance caltech learn more at caltechweapons.com that’s keltecweapons.com tell them that dana sent you have you guys heard of transblind No, it is not a type of window blind. No. It’s a new alphabet flag. Trans-blind is a trans-abled identity where someone desires to physically lose sight from an eye or from both eyes or to a physical non-blind individual who internally feels or identifies as blind without necessarily desiring to become… Oh my gosh.
SPEAKER 03 :
Why? Why?
SPEAKER 01 :
I would say it’s reality blind. Why do people… Why did they make a flag for people who can’t see?
SPEAKER 03 :
That doesn’t make sense, does it?
SPEAKER 01 :
I mean, that’s the first obvious question. If it’s supposed to be trans-blind, you’re appropriating blindness, why would you make a flag that they can’t see? Like, y’all didn’t even try to put Braille up in this. What in the world? That doesn’t make any sense, does it? There was a story that I found… Someone had shared it’s from a few years ago. Speaking of trans blind, this woman identified as trans blind. And back then, and this was in 2015, they called it body integrity identity disorder. Now it’s just trans blind. What other people would call crazy. All right. You can put all these words and affix it to it. B is crazy. All right. 30-year-old woman in North Carolina. This is back in 2015. She had wanted to be blind since she was a little girl. So she poured drain cleaner in her eyes, didn’t get medical attention, and lost her vision. She is now almost completely blind. And she says that this is the way I was supposed to be born. And they write in the piece, and it’s Women’s Health Mag that has the story. They write in the piece that she… because she wanted to be blind and she says it’s the way I was supposed to be. They go, it’s insane. And she suffers from a condition called body integrity identity disorder. And it makes people that they’re supposed to be disabled. Like people who want to be paraplegic. That’s a thing. That’s a real thing. And so it’s trans something. So this is trans blind. I think they call it transabled or something or trans. I don’t know what they call it. It’s an actual thing. I went down the rabbit hole. It’s wild. So… What? I mean… I have no words, Cain.
SPEAKER 03 :
I don’t have many more than that.
SPEAKER 01 :
I don’t have any… I don’t even… I can’t even believe just… I mean, all they gotta do… You don’t have to pour drain cleaner in your eyes. Can’t you just close your eyes?
SPEAKER 03 :
Close your eyes?
SPEAKER 01 :
You dummy.
SPEAKER 03 :
They sell those pirate patches, too. They sell pirate patches. You can get not only for Halloween, but you can buy them at the medical store, too.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 03 :
Get those eye patches.
SPEAKER 01 :
Get you an eye patch. It’s super simple.
SPEAKER 03 :
And then if you ever feel like later you want to reverse this trans-blind desire, you just take the patch off, and then you’re good.
SPEAKER 01 :
Why doesn’t anyone over at Cane, as you know, go, I’m a trans-billionaire? Right. I identify as a billionaire. Give me my money. Give me my plane. You’re hurting my mental health by not giving me a billion dollars.
SPEAKER 03 :
Where’s my FAA authorized takeoff on my private plane?
SPEAKER 01 :
Where’s my G6? Come on. I mean, you see what I’m saying? Just give me the money or it’s hurting my mental health. Why can’t I say that and make that happen? Why can’t any of you? I’m a trans billionaire. I’m saying that now. That’s official. I’m identifying as a billionaire. I need my money to affirm my…
SPEAKER 03 :
wealth i just think you’re dreaming small i’m a trans trillionaire and you you know whatever you’re doing it’s fine that’s what you want to do but wait does that mean that that’s a bigger identity box than mine yeah well what’s after trillionaire quadrillionaire yeah okay can i be that you can be that if you want to i mean you’re only doing it because i’m a trans no i really feel that way i really identify like that i feel like you’re doing it just because i became a trans trillionaire
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, but you just can’t become it. You’ve got to feel it. I feel it. I feel like you’re appropriating.
SPEAKER 03 :
I feel like I’m becoming it.
SPEAKER 01 :
But I feel like you’re appropriating, though. I don’t know.
SPEAKER 03 :
I’m not sure that’s how it’s going down.
SPEAKER 01 :
I love when people say that, too. When they’re like, I feel like that’s just them trying to soften the blow of bitchery. I really feel like, no, just say it. Just say it. You don’t feel like that. Obviously, that’s redundant because you’re saying an opinion. So you feel that way. You moron. Stop saying it. Shut up. Transblind. Just close your eyes. Put a headband on. Get one of them headbands on Amazon. Pull it over your face. It would probably be an improvement for some of them. Just pull it over your face. There’s this crazy invention that they made. I don’t know when they made it, Cain. But it’s really amazing. Real modern, right? I guess they don’t have them where these people come from. But it’s like a pillow shaped like sunglasses and it has a strap on it. And you can put it on your head over your eyes.
SPEAKER 03 :
Wow.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah. Some people use it when they sleep, you know, to get the… I take it on red eyes. It’s an amazing invention. These people should meet it.
SPEAKER 03 :
pretty common invention though, right?
SPEAKER 01 :
No, no, these people don’t know it exists. I mean, they’re willing to pour bleach in their damn eyes for crying out loud. They don’t know it exists. Clearly. How many flags are there? Hang on. I’m afraid to look at those.
SPEAKER 03 :
It’s unlimited, I’m sure, right? Just like the genders is unlimited, its flags are unlimited too, right?
SPEAKER 01 :
Oh, well, there’s just pride flags also. That’s like a whole thing. There’s like 72 gender flags. I know that the Department of Defense had put out something a little bit ago where they had… What were they talking about? They mentioned some kind of… It was like some kind of woke flag that they had. And they put it out. And I’m like, why is the DOD doing this? You want to know why you have problems with recruitment and all this other stuff? And they put out something for what was like a trans flag whatever day. I don’t even know. I don’t even know. But they said that there’s… I don’t know what a demiflux is or a gender puck, but these are things. 72 flags. There’s 72 flags. They said there are 72 different genders.
SPEAKER 03 :
That’s 70 more.
SPEAKER 01 :
I don’t even think that the people who say that they’re one of these genders know what the hell these flags are.
SPEAKER 03 :
No, but there’s not one person that could identify all of them and recognize them on site. Like, there’s so many.
SPEAKER 01 :
I mean, what is the point of it? And then everybody wants government. They want government preference. Oh, there’s mirror gender. Do you hear about this? What? So this sounds like a really bad superpower to have. You’re changing your gender type based on the people that are surrounding you. It’s like mystery men and completely lame powers that don’t serve anybody. Like the guy who can be invisible, but only when no one’s looking.
SPEAKER 03 :
It’s like a gender chameleon.
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah, you can change your gender type based on the people around you.
SPEAKER 03 :
So if I’m next to a woman, I can identify as a woman?
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 03 :
And if I’m next to a guy, then I can then identify as a guy?
SPEAKER 01 :
Yeah. That’s stupid. I don’t know about the magic that makes you morph for frankenbeans or not or have it demorph. Is that a word? Because it can be. I mean, hell, if they can create a flag, I can make up words. Why not? Everyone’s Lewis Carroll today. I don’t understand some of this stuff. Some of it, I don’t know. What’s going to happen in the future when people look back? When we look back on people in the dark ages, what are they going to think when they look back on us? These people couldn’t even figure out their genders. Look at all their flags. Everybody has to have a flag. You could not tell me. All the people who advocate this, they could not tell me what all these flags stand for. 72 different ones. This is dumb. If you’re looking for a convenient, affordable way to access medications and treatments you can trust, all family pharmacy has you covered. Whether it’s the flu or parasites, cancer support, or general well-being, all family pharmacies online service makes getting the medications you need hassle-free. With All Family, it’s simple. You can choose the individual medications that best suit your needs or opt for one of their comprehensive treatment packages designed to give you everything that you need in one convenient order. And every order comes with a doctor’s prescription included. Ivermectin. hydroxychloroquine, or any other effective medications, they have it all. And you can get fast shipping with most order shipping in two to three business days. Medications start as low as $3 per capsule, making it really easy to take charge of your health without breaking the bank. No insurance needed. You can skip the paperwork and get the treatments you need directly. Stock up with their emergency preparedness bundles and access over 200 medications online anytime. Visit allfamilypharma.com slash Dana and use code Dana10 for 10% off of your entire order. That’s allfamilypharma.com slash Dana, code Dana10.
SPEAKER 03 :
And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
SPEAKER 01 :
So Google founder Sergey Brin is the latest tech titan to make Mar-a-Lago the Mar-a-Lago pilgrimage. You got to go there and then you have to walk around the fountain three times. And then I’m joking. But you know what? They’re all going there because they’re all terrified that. They’re all terrified that Trump is like very close with Elon Musk. And so now all the other tech bros are like, wait a minute. We want to be friends, too. What’s up? So they’re all going down there to bend the knee. Interesting. Elton John says legalizing cannabis is one of the greatest mistakes of all time. He says that marijuana is addictive and it leads to other drugs, says the singer who wears gold jackets. No. Yeah. But I I mean, it’s Elton John. Isn’t he part made of drugs? I think his DNA is cocaine, isn’t it? Maybe. I don’t know, because wouldn’t he be a big old druggie back in the day? Maybe. What do you mean, maybe?
SPEAKER 03 :
I don’t know. I think I heard he might have done a few.
SPEAKER 01 :
I think you’re being a smartass now. No. He’s made of drugs, isn’t he? I can’t confirm or deny it. He’s literally a cocaine snowman who’s wearing these Gucci glasses and a gold jacket. He said that it’s addictive and leads to other drugs. And he goes, and when you’re stoned and I’ve been stoned, you don’t think normally. That’s what he said. He goes, it’s one of the greatest mistakes of all time. I don’t know. That’s interesting. Well, he knows a little something about this, though. He knows, man. Let’s see. Norway is building the world’s longest, deepest undersea road tunnel. Interesting. Interesting. It’s called ROGFAST. It’s going to be collecting two places you know intimately, Randenburg and Bochum. Yes, we’re separated by a 16-mile-wide body of water. So they’re going to build this tunnel. and a four-lane undersea tunnel. It’s going to be the world’s longest and deepest, and it will connect these two districts. So it eliminates the need for ferries, and the tunnel will slash 11 hours from a 21-hour journey on their E39 coastal highway, which, as you all know, runs to the fan favorite Trondheim in the north to Kristiansand in the south. Very important, because people need to be able to commute, Kane, to the Stavanger cities. It’s very important. So they got this underwater tunnel. Japan is auctioning off fresh fin whale meat at $1,300 for two pounds for the first time in nearly five decades. That’s oddly specific. I mean, when you’re, I get that they’re foodies, you know, and I love watching like, you know, I love watching like these food documentaries, but thin whale meat, like the fin of a whale, right? Like that’s the part you want to eat. Like out of all the other parts of the world, you’re like, give me that thin meat, right? Like that just, it seems cartilage-y. Yeah, well, why would you want to eat that? It’s not like Wagyu marbling or anything or ribeye marbling. It’s just, why would you want to eat that? $1,300 for two pounds. 2.2 pounds, sorry. That’s how much it was sold for an auction. Fin whales are one of three whale species. Okay, so I guess it’s the type of whale that they hunt for consumption. I mean, if it’s just like regular whale meat, sure, that looks tasty. It’s like a red meat in it. Looks good. All right, I’m down with it. I’m not supposed to say that, am I? Look, I eat animals, okay? Don’t know if this is going to shock people or not, but it happens. Let’s see. A statue was discovered at Cleopatra’s alleged tomb to reveal her true face. So was she a hottie or a naughty? I don’t know. I mean, it’s just the stone figure of a face and it’s really hard to gauge and it’s all covered in dirt and grime and ick. So it’s kind of hard to assuage whether or not she’s gorge. You know, we’ll see. We got a lot more on the way, including D.C. food workers are vowing that Trump officials are not going to feel welcomed when dining out at the nation’s capital. We’ll talk. Stick with us. I got to tell you about the story with these D.C. food workers. This is wild. This is so crazy. So D.C. food workers are vowing that Trump officials are not going to feel welcome when dining out in the nation’s capital. They said one of these restaurant workers said, And you would think they’d just be happy for the business, right? One of these restaurant workers said, you expect the masses to just ignore RFK eating at Le Diplomate on Sunday morning just after a few mimosas and not throw a drink in his face? Yeah, because you’re not an animal. I mean, maybe you are. I don’t know. Maybe these people are. But they said that they’re refusing to provide service and they want to make it inconvenient for other members of the public. That’s really going to get the public on your side, by the way. When you do that, when you interrupt everyone else’s When you interrupt everyone else’s experience, when you interrupt their dinner that they worked hard to afford, they want to go out and have a nice dinner. When you do all of that, that’s really going to persuade people to come to your side. Food workers are pledging. They said that they’re going to refuse services if they see Trump officials in their restaurants. They said industry veterans, bartenders and servers. in the nation’s capital, told the Washingtonian that resistance to these figures in their city was inevitable and a matter of conscience. They said they’re going to shun certain officials or employ other small acts of resistance against these figures to, quote unquote, take their power back. What? This is so stupid. Then don’t work in food service. Just simply just don’t work in food service then. I mean, businesses have the right to refuse entry. I believe the businesses can do what they want. But I was also told, Cain, that these people need to make the cake. Make the cake, bigots. You got to make the cake. Remember, that’s what you all screamed about for 10 years. make the cake forcing bakers. They would go and find these Christian bakers and they would demand that they make like really offensive, like the Jack Phil, I can’t even, don’t even know if I can say what the trans activist was trying to get Jack Phillips to make the baker in Denver that they’ve been suing on and off for 10 years now. And it went all the way up to the Supreme Court and the Supreme Court affirmed his rights because out of all the bakers in Denver, they wanted Jack Phillips, who is a devout Christian, to make this dude who pretends to be a chick, I think, sued him. And at first they wanted a same sex marriage cake and he didn’t he doesn’t do those. He doesn’t even do Halloween cakes because I’ve asked him and he told me no. He doesn’t do a divorce. He doesn’t do anything like that. He is very he is he’s one of those who says he’s devout and is actually devout. Not everyone who says it is. He genuinely is. Very soft-spoken man. And he’s a very talented baker and cake decorator. And so there was this guy who was cosplaying as a chick after he’d been sued by a same-sex couple who purposefully targeted his business because of his faith. And they… With this, they ended up – I guess it got the attention of some of these trans activists, so they started going after him for that. One guy – did you remember what one guy wanted? It was basically a male copulatory organ as a cake with some – I can’t even say what they wanted written on the cake. So they purposefully – tried to order the most offensive thing that you could. And obviously Jack Phillips was like, no. And they sued over that request. Now imagine you’re not even a devout Christian baker and you just find it in bad taste to make stuff like this. And you said no. And I think with anyone else that probably would have been fine, but he couldn’t refuse it because he’s a Christian. So they’ve been target. They were targeting him forever. So I look at this stuff and I’m like, you know, this is you got to bake the cake. You just said you don’t have a choice anymore. You you by your own design, you have to bake the cake. So you’re going to have to serve these Trump officials. You don’t get to not serve the Trump officials. You’ve got to suck it up, buttercup, or find a new line of work. It’s just that simple. But I got to say, I don’t know that I would want to go in a restaurant where I know that people don’t like me. And I’m really weird, as Kane can attest about this. How weird am I? Pretty weird. Yeah, about where I go out to eat and I have like places. I’m very particular. You have to be. You have to be. I mean, when you’ve had people threatening to kill you out and about, you know, before, obviously things are calmer now. But it’s a little, you know, you got to be a little careful. And I just like good food. I don’t like to go and… If I’m going to spend the money to eat food that I didn’t prepare, it better be damn good. So I don’t know that I would want to go to a restaurant where people don’t want me there or where I feel like they’re going to spit it. Although that would be… Isn’t that like a criminal act? That’s a criminal act. You spit in someone’s food. If you spit on them, that can be like battery. I don’t know what it is if you… You’d probably lose your license if you spit in their food. But I don’t know. I… Interesting. Very interesting. So they shouldn’t then just get out of the business. Then just don’t serve food. Remember when they ran Sarah Huckabee Sanders out of a restaurant? The left did. Remember that? I can’t remember what that dive restaurant was called. She’s like the nicest person. She was in the nicest person in the first Trump campaign. administration she legit was like the nicest most inoffensive person and not because by design she just did her work and she just didn’t have time for your nonsense and they ran her out of a restaurant Sarah Huckabee Sanders like the nicest person ever they just don’t care they don’t care I don’t even want to eat at a restaurant in DC if I’m being real There’s like only a couple of places that you can go if you’re known to be conservative where you don’t get grief. Apparently, I got a lot of friends who live in D.C. and this is what I’m told. So I don’t know. These people need to suck it up or find a new line of work. I’m so tired of this stuff. It’s just so bad. Yeah. And Steve is like, Steve, like, tell people people who don’t go to D.C. often or maybe who have never been to D.C. This is a weird culture about D.C. Tell people because you can you I can tell you the name of a restaurant and you’ll be like, oh, yeah, that’s a Democrat or Republican place.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, I’m not going to name drop restaurants because I don’t want to do that. Oh, totally not. But there are certain pockets of neighborhoods and certain restaurants and certain neighborhoods that are just like safe. I hate the word safe space, but that’s when people know where to go. It’s kind of sad.
SPEAKER 01 :
It’s like games, but like with political parties.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, I know them, but I’m not going to say them on the air.
SPEAKER 01 :
So if you’re a Republican and you roll up in a Democrat part of the town in a Democrat restaurant, what’s that like? Is that like the blood going into the crypt zone?
SPEAKER 02 :
No, it’s like the entire town. But people just kind of congregate with people who are like-minded sometimes, and people know where that place is.
SPEAKER 01 :
That’s funny. That is so funny. Because aren’t there a Democrat steakhouse and a Republican steakhouse?
SPEAKER 02 :
That might be for the upper class, but I don’t attend those very often.
SPEAKER 01 :
I’ve heard I heard that there was a Republican steakhouse to illustrate how little I try to go to D.C. and a Democrat one. The whole thing fascinates me. So I’m like, don’t I don’t even think Republicans would go into some of these places where they would have these workers if it’s going to be that hardcore.
SPEAKER 02 :
Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts.
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