SPEAKER 06 : 0:00

Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.

SPEAKER 10 : 0:06

It’s his life mission to make bad decisions.

SPEAKER 09 : 0:12

It’s time for Florida Man.

SPEAKER 07 : 0:14

That’s right. It is time for Florida Man on the Dana Show, D-Lash, Dana Lash Radio, and X on Twitter to stay connected to everything going on for her and the very fancy, very powerful show that this is. Also, Radio Craig Z, if you want to be nice enough to follow me and get me over 500 people on X on Twitter, that would not be bad. I need to do more. All right, let’s move on. Florida man. I have several of them. First, a Florida man was arrested after assaulting a woman who had refused to let him smell her feet. This is a real thing. Now, what’s amazing about this story beyond the creepy, horrible parts of it is the woman. She had a guy come up to her and be like, hey, can I smell your feet? She said no. She acted like this guy was a total creep, which he was. He proceeded to get in an SUV and hit her, and she popped up. She has minor scrapes and bruises and even did an interview talking about what happened and how it happened. This woman is amazing. She’s like, yeah, fine. He hit me with the car and whatever. Screw that guy. I’ll track him down and I will kill him. I feel like she’s a Liam Neeson type from Taken. She’s about to find him and all of his family and make them regret the day he tried to offer with an SUV. Again, incredible. Here she is.

SPEAKER 01 : 1:27

We had met up because I was going to sell him my sneakers. He just wanted to sniff my feet and I didn’t feel comfortable with that. I mean, you could have my sneakers all you want. I mean, I don’t care. I’m not wearing them. You know, they’re just stinky old sneakers, but people like weird things. And I met him down in the parking garage. He did a three point turn and actually hit me with a car, ran me over. I’ve met a lot of people who have foot fetishes. Nobody has ever done anything to this caliber.

SPEAKER 07 : 1:56

Yeah, nobody’s ever tried to hit her with a car before. It’s weird that she’s also like, yeah, no, my normal thing that I’m doing is just trying to sell a guy my shoes. I just give him my sneakers that he seems to want. And I feel like she’s made these kind of deals in back alleys before. She’s met a lot of people who have foot fetishes, obviously, and nobody has ever done anything of this caliber. is a unique quote to go down with this woman. But a Florida woman who popped up after getting hit by a car while trying to sell her shoes to a creepster actually happened probably the way you might have assumed. This is why you probably shouldn’t set up a deal to sell your shoes to anybody. Anyway, other things out there. Other Florida men. A Florida man abandoned an 11-year-old dog on the side of the road of a remote road. Uniquely horrible. Uh, story here, pieces of crap, uh, that leave, uh, this guy got arrested for it too, which is awesome. Um, people who leave dogs and don’t care about dogs and how much dogs love us as people are people that I’m fine with throwing the, uh, you know, complete book at in every way you can punish them as much as humanly possible. But this is crazy. Investigators said Sean Anthony Miller, 28, drove to Indiantown and left Coco on the side of the road before driving away. The Martin County Sheriff’s Office, which assisted the West Palm Beach office, identified and arrested Miller, charging him with animal abandonment. which is illegal. That’s the problem. You can’t just do that. And the dog looks sad in the photo, which makes me even angrier because someone hopefully adopts and takes care of this dog. 11 year old that was just left on the side of the road. Finally, one last story. A Florida man was accused of getting lost in a marsh in heavy rain. Not accused. He did that. And then he had to get rescued by people. The Florida man probably cost a bunch of people a bunch of money. But Flagler County Sheriff’s Office said a man called 911 on the night of August 28th to report that he had gotten lost. in the Princess Place Preserves, which you probably should never go to a place called the Princess Place Preserves, a 1500 acre nature preserve known for its many hiking trails and extensive salt marshes. It was raining heavily. The man reported he was ankle deep in water and he didn’t know where he was. communication specialist decided to help, uh, coordinate, um, you know, the survive, the, uh, rescue of this dude, um, who is obviously very thrilled that they’re willing to go save stupid people that do stupid things. Uh, but maybe next time don’t wander to a marsh alone by yourself and think, ah, I can figure out how to get out of this thing. And that’s probably a better move. Just stay at the beach, man. Flagler’s got a great beach.

SPEAKER 02 : 4:32

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SPEAKER 08 : 5:25

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SPEAKER 03 : 6:21

I’ve got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how’s it going today?

SPEAKER 11 : 6:25

It’s going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I’m Dan Morgan. I’m an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan & Morgan, which is America’s largest injury law firm.

SPEAKER 03 : 6:35

That’s pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of yours recently that said $20 billion won. $20 billion is an insane number.

SPEAKER 11 : 6:44

Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It’s actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on.

SPEAKER 03 : 6:56

Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan & Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident?

SPEAKER 11 : 7:01

Probably the easiest way is dialing Pound Law. That’s Pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow.

SPEAKER 03 : 7:11

Dan Morgan from Morgan & Morgan, America’s large injury law firm. Thanks for coming by the show.

SPEAKER 11 : 7:16

Thanks for having me. Visit ForThePeople.com for an office near you.

SPEAKER 07 : 7:23

Ex-MSNBC host Joy Reid is going full conspiracy theorist, baby. She’s getting crazy, crazier and crazier, I should say. She was already insane. And some of the things she’s claiming to be true. Her latest discussion is about how Trump was not shot, which is something a lot of the left has said. Now, here’s what’s amazing to me. The left or people who vote democratically pretend that they are immune to conspiracy theory. They pretend as though conspiracy theory is something the right solely dabbles in. It’s the reason that the right is so brainwashed by Trump or anyone else is all these things that they think are happening in the world that definitely aren’t. like election fraud, even when, you know, in Milwaukee, you have another person caught red handed via election fraud. That never happens, but apparently happens a lot. But the left pretends they don’t believe and they don’t, you know, trade in these same conspiratorial thoughts. And then they put out stuff like this. And a whole lot of people seem to believe it on that side that Trump was not shot at all, which is insane. Here we go.

SPEAKER 05 : 8:29

He’s got these magical doctors who claim that he was shot in the ear, but his ear, I guess, grew back. He had a duplo bandage on one minute, no bandage the next. We can’t get a medical record from this alleged assassination. He was supposedly shot. We have nothing.

SPEAKER 04 : 8:42

We’ve got nothing. You can’t even ask. Where are the investigative records? One day he slapped his maxi pad on his ear. The next day, the ear is totally fine.

SPEAKER 05 : 8:51

It’s fine. And I remember being in mainstream media where we both used to work saying, isn’t it odd that we’ve never asked for his medical records? And I got in trouble for that.

SPEAKER 07 : 9:00

By the way, Katie Fang is the name of the other voice that you’re hearing in there. I love that they both say that they they’re no longer in mainstream media. Because you’ve got to be uniquely terrible for people like MSNBC or MSNOW to fire you. But I think what’s crazy about this is this is full-on conspiracy craziness. We never demanded the medical records of what happened with Trump’s ear. How dare we not do more of this? This is crazy. This is insane. And who would be complicit in pretending as though Trump was shot when he wasn’t shot would be through the roof. It’d be all the mainstream media outlets that hate the guy. They would have to be like, okay, yeah, we’re going to report on this thing that we know is not true. Why is it so difficult for the brains of some people to accept something when they hate someone so much? I don’t get that. It’s a desire to reject the truth at all costs. I think that ability to push us into our political sides of the aisle to polarize us even more is the thing most counted on by the people in politics today. who need you to be insane and crazy in order to reject any narrative that comes out of the side of the aisle that you claim you’re not on. Joy Reid going deep in the rabbit hole as to President Trump was not almost killed by an assassin and that he luckily turned his head at the last minute and had his ear hurt and damaged. Like, oh, that’s insane to me. How significant of an impact the bullet made on his body and his body’s ability to heal from that is irrelevant to me. I don’t care. I don’t care if it barely grazed his ear. Not that that’s what people say, although mostly that is what people say. And he could fully recover from that relatively quickly. I care about the fact that a gunman was able to take a shot that could have killed him if he hadn’t turned his head. That part matters to me. The part that’s insane is the left seems upset that it wasn’t a more harmful hit, that he wasn’t more harmed or potentially even killed by that shot, which is, I think, the part that they’re not saying out loud, but in the back of their brain. that if Trump was almost assassinated, their problem is the word almost. That they would prefer an actual assassination to, you know, harmed and then influentially, sort of miraculously standing up and putting his hand in the air and saying, fight, fight, fight, in a way that’s truly iconic and American. I remember even Mark Zuckerberg came out saying how he thought that was uniquely inspiring to watch someone almost get killed and immediately react the way that Trump did. There’s something fascinating about that again. And so the left just can’t handle it. I can give credit. when credit is due to the other side of the aisle. I promise you I can, and I’ve done it before. Dana’s actually great at it, too. You can give credit to moments or attack things that you disagree with on your own side of the political aisle because it gets you out of the stupid, warped cone of, I don’t know, polarizing politics that so many desire you to be in. People should do the mental exercise of digesting a lot of the news media on the other side of the political aisle, listening to what they’re saying and how they’re saying it, mostly because that exercise helps you to understand the argument and also helps you to understand at times if there’s something that is uniquely true and not being highlighted as much by the side of the aisle that you might be on. A whole lot of Democrats should be listening to this show every single day. And actually, I bet they are because of the size of the audience of this show. But they should be because occasionally we’re going to tell you things. Dana is going to tell you things that your side of the aisle doesn’t even want to talk about. They refuse to talk about and they’re terrified to talk about because they know it might actually influence you to not see Republicans and Trump specifically as a horrible enemy. Even what he said, and I played it yesterday. About why he wants the end of the Ukraine-Russia conflict. That he just wants to save lives and stop people from dying. It’s a uniquely presidential way to respond to a question about that. He’s not saying that Putin is, you know, the devil the way that Biden did. Not that Putin’s a good guy. Of course not. But he is just saying more diplomatically, I’d like to see the end. And I’m trying to to work with both sides, communicate with both sides, not alienate either side in this relationship in order to get us to a place of peace. That’s not played in media anywhere because it goes it flies in the face of the person they want you to think Trump is all the time. All right. We’ll take a break. A lot coming up. Craig Collins filling in on the Dana show.

SPEAKER 02 : 13:36

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SPEAKER 08 : 14:20

I bet you’ve probably been to the doctor’s office in the past few months. I bet you had to hand over personal info like your insurance, your ID, maybe even your social security number. And I bet you weren’t thinking about how your doctor is just one of many places that has your personal information. If any one of them isn’t careful, it’s a good bet they could accidentally expose your details to hackers and identity theft. putting you at risk. Fortunately, LifeLock monitors hundreds of millions of data points a second for threats to your identity. If your identity is stolen, a LifeLock U.S.-based restoration specialist will fix it, guaranteed, or your money back, with plans covering up to $3 million for stolen funds and expenses. Don’t take chances with your personal info. Help protect it even when it’s out of your hands. Save up to 40% your first year with promo code IHEART. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code IHEART or go to lifelock.com slash IHEART for 40% off. Terms apply.

SPEAKER 03 : 15:17

I’ve got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how’s it going today? It’s going good, man.

SPEAKER 11 : 15:22

Tell us who you are and what you do. I’m Dan Morgan. I’m an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan & Morgan, which is America’s largest injury law firm.

SPEAKER 03 : 15:30

That’s pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of yours recently that said $20 billion won. $20 billion is an insane number.

SPEAKER 11 : 15:39

Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It’s actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on.

SPEAKER 03 : 15:51

Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan & Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident?

SPEAKER 11 : 15:57

Probably the easiest way is dialing Pound Law. That’s Pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365.

SPEAKER 03 : 16:07

Wow. Dan Morgan from Morgan & Morgan, America’s large injury law firm. Thanks for coming by the show.

SPEAKER 11 : 16:11

Thanks for having me. Visit ForThePeople.com for an office near you. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.

SPEAKER 07 : 16:21

That’s right. It’s time for a quick five on the Dana Show. D. Lash, Dana Lash Radio and X on Twitter at Radio Craig C. If you want to follow my tweets about the Yankees. But I am in for her for this week. All right. A few crazy things out there. First, a gold price hit a record high. Investors are looking for a sweet, delicious, safe haven from all the craziness that we might see, especially with the discussions about tariffs, their legality. We’re funding them. All kinds of things are out there as far as discussion goes. So people are investing in gold, baby, which is something people do all the time. And it’s usually a good idea, especially a good idea during volatile times, which we might be blazing toward. China is set to unveil the world’s most powerful laser defense system. This would be in front of Vladimir Putin and Russia. The United States and Trump have stood very strongly, even when the mainstream media people tell you he doesn’t do this, by accusing people like North Korea, China, Russia, whoever, of conspiring against the United States, something he put up on social media. This feels like a aspect of that whole discussion. That whole thing is these countries seem very proud of themselves. India at times seems too to be closer in these relationships than you want them to be. But it is interesting that China will unveil a very unique laser defense system in front of Vladimir Putin. It seems to be done on purpose, of course. Vaping may be causing irreversible harm to children’s health, doctors say. It feels identical to the evolution of cigarettes, like truly vaping feels somehow crazily the same aspects of the dangers of vaping were obvious going in because of everything that happened with cigarettes, whether you smoke or not, not judging, just saying. So I think it’s interesting that so many people, young people thought, hey, vaping way safer. And it seems to be more and more demonstrated how utterly inaccurate that statement is. But there are more pieces of information coming out, especially if you’re younger. This is actually also true of pot smoking. If you’re younger and you start smoking pot, the damage to your brain is tremendously more significant than if you get older. That’s one of the big reasons that you should not ever smoke. be even remotely cool with your kids smoking. But I digress. That is a thing that’s out there that does seem to be backed up by a whole lot of data. Three people were arrested after $1,000 worth of stolen meat was found in a car. That sounds less than sanitary. is a comment that one of the people on this team sent to me along with this story, which is hilarious, by Radio Kane. But three people were arrested. $1,000 worth of meat was found, all prepackaged, all individually wrapped. I’m not sure if it was cold or not, but this is a unique, crazy story. The funniest part to me is that I don’t think this is out of Florida, which was disappointing. This feels like the kind of story that would definitely be a Florida story, but it’s not. Um… One other aspect of it, too, I should mention, and this is something I thought immediately when I saw it, I would love to have been driving this car. I’m not having the stolen stuff, but it looks like it’s a whole lot of delicious steak. Again, not sure if it’s still good. Not sure if any of this is still currently delicious. But just driving around in a thousand dollar meat car is something that I find uniquely fun as an idea. Just having a whole bunch of steak and pulling up at some sort of, you know, grill, some sort of a cookout and being able to provide delicious food. I don’t know that that’s what they were doing. I feel like something else horrible was happening. I think this actually happened in the UK, by the way, which for some reason amuses me even more. And then finally, one last story for our quick five. The Bay Area city has a major geese poop problem, a Bay Area city, I should say. And they’re going to spend four hundred thousand dollars on doing this. Canadian geese are wreaking havoc all throughout San Francisco. And so it’s going to cost almost half a million bucks to try to get that under control. This feels like part of the reason that California has so many terrible problems. mostly because I think that I and a few of my friends could deal with this geese poop problem for way less than 400 grand. We can get it done for you guys. If California wants to hire us, I know a few people. I’ll bring them with me from Texas. It’ll be over in a weekend. We’ll have no problem with it, and we’ll take like 200 grand. That sounds about right for us. But I do love this. I love the fact that this is, you know, a thing that they’re talking about spending this kind of money on because it also demonstrates to you how profoundly wasted money gets when government gets its mitts on it. You all know that. I know that. We see it every single day. But spending half a million to deal with goose poop has got to be at the top end of any sort of list. This is the Dana Show. My name is Craig Collins filling in. Of course, I will continue to talk about the story that is intentionally big today, meaning it deserves to be big, but also media is overly focused on it. That would be the latest in the Epstein story. The accusers coming forward, President Trump’s reaction to it. I promise I’ll get to that. However, I’m uniquely amused by something else that’s out there. Representative Hank Johnson tried to go after Nigel Farage in a pretty hilarious way and definitely didn’t have it work out for him as the politician from the UK was speaking in front of members of our political system. This is uniquely hilarious to me, some of this back and forth. I love even the way that it starts with the whole, why were you in Wisconsin? I think you might kind of know why I was in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, back and forth. So here we go. And actually, you know what? I’ll just call this all a palate cleanser for more of the crazy news stuff that’s out there because this is just more fun to listen to than that stuff.

SPEAKER 09 : 22:10

Welcome to the United States of America. This isn’t your first time here, correct? Correct. You were here in 2024 in Milwaukee, weren’t you?

SPEAKER 10 : 22:23

I’ve been coming here since 1982 on a very regular basis. I work for American companies for many, many years.

SPEAKER 09 : 22:27

What purpose were you coming to Milwaukee for? Why did you come to Milwaukee? I’ve been to Milwaukee many times. I think that particular event was a convention. In 2024 was the convention, the Republican convention. I think that’s right. I think you’re right. The Trump convention.

SPEAKER 10 : 22:40

I think you’re right. Very good. Where Trump was coronated. What he won didn’t say. I mean, yes.

SPEAKER 09 : 22:45

He had already won.

SPEAKER 10 : 22:47

We already knew who had won. It’s cool.

SPEAKER 09 : 22:50

But it was his coronation and you attended.

SPEAKER 07 : 22:53

This is already so stupid that the politician is trying to be like, we caught you. You were here. And you are from the UK. And we think this is a conspiracy or some sort of important thing somehow. And he’s like, I come here all the time. I’m not hiding any of this. This is weird. You’re acting like this is some big, giant story.

SPEAKER 09 : 23:12

He did. And you also attended Trump rallies, correct? I’ve attended lots of Trump rallies. Make America Great Again rallies, many of them. Yes, upbeat, optimistic, happy, wonderful, joyous events. You publicly endorsed him. I thoroughly enjoyed them. I’ve even spoken at a conference. You endorsed him for president, and you attended his election night watch party. I did. And you consider Trump to be your mentor, correct? No. He’s not your mentor? No. But he is somebody who you want the support of.

SPEAKER 10 : 23:48

And you have the support. Yes, I do. I think he’s a very, very brave man.

SPEAKER 09 : 23:52

Because you are getting ready to run for Prime Minister of Great Britain, correct? Oh, I’ve been trying for years, yeah.

SPEAKER 07 : 24:01

OK, that part uniquely hilarious and true. He has run before. This is not a brand new thing that he’s doing for the first time. Every part of this so far is exactly the way you should handle someone who is trying to create controversy where there is none. It’s just awesome. Again, I’ll get to the stuff that you’re waiting for us to talk about this stuff like Epstein. But this is just too amusing.

SPEAKER 09 : 24:24

And as it stands right now, you head up a party. How many seats in the Parliament are there? 651, if you include the Speaker, that is.

SPEAKER 1 : 24:38

650.

SPEAKER 09 : 24:38

And how many seats does your party hold? How many seats do the opinion polls say we’re going to get next time? Is that your question? No, I mean, the numbers don’t lie. You only have four seats, right? I’m afraid so, yes. And so you are indeed the leader of a fringe party. Oh, I’m a fringe, all right. Don’t worry about that.

SPEAKER 10 : 25:00

Yes, absolutely.

SPEAKER 09 : 25:01

Everything I’ve ever done. And as a fringe party leader.

SPEAKER 07 : 25:05

I got to be honest, his accent might also be what’s making this so entertaining for us. But yeah, he’s totally fine with everything you’re describing him as.

SPEAKER 09 : 25:12

Seeking to run for prime minister of Great Britain. You need a lot of money in order to blow up like the MAGA movement has blown up.

SPEAKER 10 : 25:22

What you need is a message of truth and a message of hope. You need money also, right? Money is helpful, but it’s not the primary thing you need.

SPEAKER 07 : 25:30

I love that last part, too. You need a message of truth, a message of hope. You need money. It’s helpful. Whether or not we get that money from certain individuals that you seem to hate and want this to be the discussion point. The truth is that we hope that we get more seats and do better. The leader of the Reform UK party. By the way, the UK is locking people up for free speech reasons. So it seems like a uniquely bad time to be someone who’s in the UK or defending the politics-as-usual version of events that occurs there. It seems like what you really, really want is actually a lot of people that are going to behave quite a bit differently than these horrible people are behaving. And so you want someone who’s trying to reform the entirety of the party. That would be a good thing.

SPEAKER 06 : 26:13

Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

SPEAKER 08 : 26:29

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