Join Dana Lash as she unpacks the bizarre and often hilarious world of Florida Man. From mistaken identities and public intoxication to incredible tales of absurdity, explore the stories that make headlines and leave us questioning reality. Listeners are treated to Dana’s sharp wit and unapologetic commentary as she evaluates the mindset behind some of Florida’s strangest encounters.
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SPEAKER 02 :
The clock’s running out on December deal drops at Lowe’s, but there’s still time to wrap up something they’ll love. Shop great gifts under $50, like the DeWalt Elite Series 100-piece bit set. Plus, if you order by 2 p.m., you get same-day delivery by 8 p.m. Shop December deal drops while you can. Lowe’s. We help you save.
SPEAKER 10 :
Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.
SPEAKER 12 :
It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
SPEAKER 08 :
All right, so first up, This is not, if it sounds familiar, it’s not because we’ve read it before. It’s because this is a new one that’s happened. A Port Charlotte man, Florida man, got drunk and tried to enter the wrong house. Nolan Worrell, 23 years old in Port Charlotte, then got himself arrested Monday evening, Kane, because he was accused of attempting to break into a neighbor’s home while he was drunk as a skunk or a raccoon, mistakenly believing that it was his own house. At 7 p.m., Tom Dorothy, a man that has two first names, he heard banging at the empty house next door to his own. And when he went out and kind of peered out in the dark, he thought, well, he saw a nearly naked man. He was wearing just shorts, no shoes, no shirt, no nothing. Cops arrived. He wasn’t trying to break into the house for any nefarious reason. He was trying to get home and he was so drunk he couldn’t remember which house was his.
SPEAKER 12 :
That’s thoroughly drunk.
SPEAKER 08 :
Can you really be that drunk where you don’t remember what house you live in?
SPEAKER 12 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 08 :
Because you’re talking about messing with core memories at that point. I don’t know. I don’t know.
SPEAKER 12 :
Yeah, but some more dominant core memories are what come forward when you’re really, really drunk. So I’ve had friends that actually go to their old house by accident because of that.
SPEAKER 08 :
That’s kind of crazy. Woof. So in addition to that, we also have a Florida man told BWI employees that he had this airport. They had an explosive device and they had to evacuate everything. It was the Thurgood Marshall Airport. He said he had an explosive device on his in his bag. This was in Maryland. Florida man. And he was getting ready to, people who are in the process of boarding the plane were told that they had to get off and they had to evacuate and all of this stuff because this guy was, I guess, just having a fit and saying that he had an explosive device in his bag.
SPEAKER 12 :
He didn’t want to pay for the parking.
SPEAKER 08 :
You know, he didn’t want to pay for parking. I mean, it took 30 minutes, not even that, for them to be like, this guy’s full of it. But just because he was full of it does not mean that they did not detain him. It doesn’t matter whether or not you have a bomb. You’re going to have a felony charge regardless. So he went to the pokey. What?
SPEAKER 12 :
It’s a good place for him.
SPEAKER 08 :
Yeah. A Florida woman who wanted to sacrifice her husband and son tried to strangle a nurse. Ooh, this was in Pinellas Park, Florida. The woman was trying to sacrifice her husband. She got arrested. Then she tried to strangle a nurse, 58 years old. Karen, of course it is, Karen Dieter, she used a power cord from her ankle monitor to strangle the nurse. That is the most… So as we head into the holidays, it’s not just about gifts. It’s about gratitude and protecting what really matters, family and the future and your financial security. Colin Plume is the CEO at Noble Gold Investments. And I tell you, the market really opened my eyes as to how much can change in a year. I mean, think of it. The market changes fast. The economy changes fast. even your own job. So what’s the smart way to make sure that your money is actually working for you? While you’re sitting with family and thinking about all you’ve built, remember, Noble Gold Investments is here to guide you. Their team is helpful and informed, no hype, just honest advice. Gold is up 25%, the dollar is down 9%, and gold and silver have outlasted every crash and currency. It’s about long-term value and peace of mind, not chasing deals. And so that’s why you need to check out Noble Gold. Before you check out for the holidays, though, visit noblegoldinvestments.com slash Dana and download their free gold and silver guide. Open a qualified account and get 10 silver holiday coins. Visit noblegoldinvestments.com slash Dana. That’s noblegoldinvestments.com slash Dana.
SPEAKER 02 :
The clock’s running out on December deal drops at Lowe’s, but there’s still time to wrap up something they’ll love. Shop great gifts under $50, like the DeWalt Elite Series 100-piece bit set. Plus, if you order by 2 p.m., you get same-day delivery by 8 p.m. Shop December deal drops while you can. Lowe’s. We help you save.
SPEAKER 04 :
I’ve got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how’s it going today? It’s going good, man.
SPEAKER 13 :
Tell us who you are and what you do. I’m Dan Morgan. I’m an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan & Morgan, which is America’s largest injury law firm.
SPEAKER 03 :
That’s pretty awesome.
SPEAKER 13 :
Why do you guys think you win so many cases? The insurance companies and other companies that we go against know that we’re going to take it to the end, that we believe in the case. So we fight for every dollar and we’re not afraid to go that extra mile for our clients. Are insurance companies like actually afraid of you guys? We don’t bluff. We take it to trial and we are not strangers of getting very, very, very large verdicts.
SPEAKER 05 :
Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan & Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident?
SPEAKER 13 :
Probably the easiest way is dialing Pound Law. That’s Pound 529 from your cell phone. And our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow.
SPEAKER 05 :
Dan Morgan from Morgan & Morgan, America’s largest injury law firm. Thanks for coming by the show.
SPEAKER 13 :
Thanks for having me. Visit ForThePeople.com for an office near you.
SPEAKER 01 :
The entire planet has fallen off a cliff. into the stupid zone where I don’t even know what’s going on anymore. This is a small planet. We have to work together and live together and we can do that. The bad guys exploit the illusion of differences. Do you really think these refugees and immigrants are different than us? Do you really believe what these clowns like Trump, Orban, Netanyahu, Putin, do you really believe what these guys say? Or do you look at your heart and you go, wow, no, the world isn’t like that. It’s all there. If we can remove the stupid stuff that most of these bad guy leaders are dumping on us, get rid of that, the crud, and go back to who we really are, which is really profound kindness inside of us.
SPEAKER 08 :
I’m in a really crabby mood right now. You know this guy. Oh, gosh, Dana, guard your mouth right now. He’s a big fan of the old CCP. You know that, right? Richard Gere, a.k.a. Cindy Crawford’s first husband, a.k.a. the 80-year-old married to a 40-year-old. Yeah, a.k.a. Mr. Gerbil. Don’t Google that one, kids. Don’t. Welcome back to the program. Dana Lashley, the top of the second hour. He’s so this is since the winter year. Richard Geers, he’s upset over the what what POTUS has said about Somali, the Somali community in Minnesota that’s been bilking taxpayers. He’s upset over this. And I don’t really care if he is or not, because it’s always these individuals who whenever they talk about it, whether it’s him, whether I’m pulling up Ben Stiller’s remark from yesterday from yesterday or the day before, rather like Ben Stiller, when he was talking about it, they they omit the part that people are objecting to the fraud. And they act like Trump is just out there. Well, I just don’t like those Somalis. They’re they’re ignoring the whole fact that he was talking about the fraud. And what’s being perpetrated against the taxpayer in Minnesota. Richard Gere. Does he act anymore? Don’t answer that. Is he still in things? I don’t even know what the hell he does anymore. Gosh, just shut up. Just shut your old man mouth. So tired of it. Can’t he just retire and go into, you know… go into that good night can he just go away the last thing i need is some barely literate gerbil loving celebrity sitting here lecturing all of us about what we can get outraged over where it concerns our taxpayer dollars you steal my taxpayer dollars i may set your damn yard on fire i don’t care i’m just there already i’m so i’m just so aggravated at all of it richard gear Was he ever attractive? Is that the other thing, too? Was he ever considered a Hollywood it guy? I don’t even know what the hell he’s been in. They said he got blacklisted from some movies or something like that, probably because he sucks out loud. I don’t know what he does. What does he do now?
SPEAKER 12 :
I assume he still acts or does those things.
SPEAKER 08 :
What podcast is he on?
SPEAKER 12 :
Back in the day, right?
SPEAKER 08 :
What godforsaken podcast did he show up on? Some Tom, Dick, and Harry podcast. I don’t even know what thing he’s on. Actor and activist, it says here. Kill us all now. Unimportant. Oh, people are driven by profound kindness. You know, people like, you know, Trump and Netanyahu, they teach us that Somali. Why did Netanyahu? Look, I get it that he is absolutely he just dry humps Jew hatred. I get it. He’s one of those twinks that gets off on that. That’s like a whole subset. People who get off on hating Jews. He’s one of them. I get that. That’s like his thing. I don’t know why Netanyahu. I mean, that’s the only thing that explains why Netanyahu got into this. What the hell does Netanyahu have to do with Somalis in Minnesota? King’s dying. What? What does he have to do with Somalis? All of a sudden, like, oh, I stubbed my toe. Gosh dang that Netanyahu. Where the hell does this come from? How are these people like this? They’re calling the wrong person retarded. It’s not Tim Walsh. It also is, but it’s also Richard Gere. Chimney Christmas. I mean, do you really think these refugees and immigrants are different from us? Well, considering that I’m not robbing my fellow man of their taxpayer dollars, that’s a hell yeah. The fact that we don’t descend into tribal feudalism here in the United States like they do in Somalia, that’s a yes. He thinks the psychology of these people, they think they’re so much better than you. They’re so much better than you. Look at Richard Gere and his enlightened and enlightenedness. You know, how dare you, Cain, you dirty proletariat past judgment on these precious baby Somali diaspora that are stealing literally hundreds of billions of dollars. From taxpayers.
SPEAKER 12 :
Is it judgment or is it just discernment? Just shedding light?
SPEAKER 08 :
Well, it’s all racism, I’m sure.
SPEAKER 12 :
Oh, is it?
SPEAKER 08 :
Yeah, it’s all R-A-Y-S-I-S-ism. That’s what it is. I mean, I’m not even getting into the sex trafficking stuff because now they have part of the Somali diaspora that are involved in sex trafficking going back all the way to 2006. Because they have their own little mafia up there. You know, they come from Somalia. They bring their tribal warlordism. And then they pimp out chicks. I mean, it’s like a whole thing. Local media at least did talk about it. Their community radio station up there did talk about it. They talked about the Somali sex rings that they have. University of Minnesota, they had a whole thing about it where they were talking about troubled youths and Somali immigrants that are involved in all of this. So, yeah, going back to his point, I would say that because I don’t sell my fellow man into sex slavery, bring my warlord tribalism to my neighborhood. And I don’t bilk my fellow man out of billions of dollars of their hard earned money and rob them of what they could be using for their family. Yeah, I’m better. I’m different. Yeah. And I have no problem saying that if you have a problem with it, you can go do something so completely irrevocably unflattering to yourself. I don’t care. There you go. I just I’m getting tired of the lectures from these people. And he sits here at this godforsaken Ikea table. I’m so tired of seeing these stupid, stupid modern furniture and these crappy little podcasts. He’s sitting here at this godforsaken Ikea table. Pinkies out, gerbils up. Like he’s sitting at this table like, oh, you guys are so mean. Talking about the immigrants that are putting women in sex slavery and all this stuff. And by the way, we’re talking about the immigrants that do this. It’s not our fault, short bus, if you are interpreting this as meaning every immigrant because you’re the racist or because you’re so desperate for deflection against a scandal that you contributed to. that you have to do this. Well, they’re talking about all immigrants, not just the immigrants that are perpetrating this. They’re talking about all of the immigrants. No, we’re talking about the people who are doing this. How hard is that for you absolute demons to understand? We’re talking about the people who are engaged in this. And yeah, if you’re looking the other way, you’re part of the problem. If you’re in the community and you’re not participating in it, but you’re protecting it by not saying anything, you’re part of the problem. You’re no different. It is the folks at Caltech, Florida-based company, the KF7 Gen 2 shotgun, if you’re familiar with it. It’s a pump-action shotgun made by Kel-Tec, a family-owned company. All the original KF-7 advantages are there. It’s super ultra-lightweight. It weighs just under 7 pounds unloaded. And you also, as well, have all of the maneuverability and tight spaces. It’s a compact bullpup design. So you have ambidextrous downward shell ejection, 7 plus 1 capacity. You also, that Gen 2, the upgrade, you have a 5-slot Picatinny-style rail. accessory rail underneath. So you can add grips, you can add lights, you can keep it flush and sleek with a cap as well. And it’s a smoother pump action too. So you have that for faster, cleaner cycling. Plus you have the enhanced durability. And MSRP makes it super affordable.
SPEAKER 1 :
$639.
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That’s the MSRP. It’s from Kel-Tec, made in America, family owned. K-E-L-T-E-C weapons.com. It’s the KS7 Gen 2. Kel-Tec weapons.com. Tell them Dana sent you.
SPEAKER 02 :
The clock’s running out on December deal drops at Lowe’s, but there’s still time to wrap up something they’ll love. Shop great gifts under $50, like the DeWalt Elite Series 100-piece bit set. Plus, if you order by 2 p.m., you get same-day delivery by 8 p.m. Shop December deal drops while you can. Lowe’s. We help you save.
SPEAKER 04 :
I’ve got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how’s it going today? It’s going good, man.
SPEAKER 13 :
Tell us who you are and what you do. I’m Dan Morgan. I’m an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan & Morgan, which is America’s largest injury law firm.
SPEAKER 03 :
That’s pretty awesome.
SPEAKER 13 :
Why do you guys think you win so many cases? The insurance companies and other companies that we go against know that we’re going to take it to the end, that we believe in the case. So we fight for every dollar and we’re not afraid to go that extra mile for our clients. Are insurance companies like actually afraid of you guys? We don’t bluff. We take it to trial and we are not strangers of getting very, very, very large verdicts.
SPEAKER 05 :
Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan & Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident?
SPEAKER 13 :
Probably the easiest way is dialing Pound Law. That’s Pound 529 from your cell phone. And our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow.
SPEAKER 05 :
Dan Morgan from Morgan & Morgan, America’s largest injury law firm. Thanks for coming by the show.
SPEAKER 13 :
Thanks for having me. Visit ForThePeople.com for an office near you.
SPEAKER 12 :
And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
SPEAKER 08 :
Shocker. Climate change, a study on climate change that would make you poorer has been retracted over major flaws because it’s a stupid, bogus study by a bunch of environmental cultists. And that’s all there is to it. I mean, it was at the Possum Institute for Climate Impact Research. And they were saying that, oh, my gosh, everybody’s going to be poor and eating cat food in the desert, basically. But they had to retract their study entirely because it turned out that 60% of everything that they said in this study was absolutely false. Who’s shocked? Not I, because the whole thing of climate change, that’s all it’s about. It’s about wealth redistribution, but between nations, not individuals. ChatGPT reportedly encouraged a violent stalker via court documents. They say that a lawsuit that was filed by the DOJ alleges that ChatGPT encouraged a man accused of harassing over a dozen women in five different states to continue stalking his victims, serving as its best friend, and it would entertain his rants and told him to ignore any criticism that he got. 31-year-old Brett Dedig was indicted by a federal grand jury on charges of cyber-stalking, interstate stalking, interstate threats, per the DOJ. on Tuesday. He went after a number of women. Let’s see. Apparently, I’m going to go down that system. Doctors are using AI a lot more. I’ve heard this. I’ve heard this from a lot of doctors. They use it as a tool. It’s not something that takes… the place of their expertise or training, but it is a tool that can enhance what they do and help with diagnosis. Diagnoses help with a number of other things. They said 30% of general practitioners in the UK are actually using AI tools. in patient consultations, which I think is incredibly important. But I think if it’s used as a tool to help treat patients, I don’t see why that would be a bad thing. They’re saying America’s diplomatic corps is in crisis at its breaking point. They were… To get into it, because they buried the lead of this god-awful story, like literally nine paragraphs in, it’s the American Foreign Service Association. They’re saying a lot of people, fewer people, are doing American Foreign Service. They’re doing like less volunteering in foreign countries, things like that. Also, you know, the big thing that goes towards reducing that is the percentage of global threats worldwide. I mean, nobody wants to go overseas and volunteer or do anything if they feel like their safety, if they feel like their government’s not even going to be able to bring them back. That’s that’s incredibly important. Also, the presidential ballroom architect. He was fired because he was the guy who said it was too big. He ultimately ended up being fired after he was arguing with POTUS and others about the size and scope of the White House ballroom. $300 million, which is being funded privately, including POTUS himself. James McCreary II and his architecture firm were replaced back in October per the Washington Post. They had battled over their desire to keep the increase to keep the size of the new building and whether or not it needed to be increased. And so interesting. We got a lot more on the way. Stick with us. All right. Can we talk about doll moms? It’s Friday.
SPEAKER 12 :
It’s just for pretend, right? It’s just a small thing.
SPEAKER 08 :
No, no. There’s apparently a thing. It’s a growing trend of women who pretend that dolls are real babies. Can I just show you cut 24, please? This is cut 24. This is the doll mom thing.
SPEAKER 07 :
It’s a lady. Morning, doll mom.
SPEAKER 12 :
She’s talking to it, too.
SPEAKER 07 :
Look at it. It looks like a possessed thing. Why is its hair that long? No baby’s got that kind of hair.
SPEAKER 12 :
The Chucky haircut?
SPEAKER 07 :
No baby’s got that long hair.
SPEAKER 01 :
Good morning, sweet baby. It’s another doll. It is another doll. Good morning, Adelia. Oh, my gosh.
SPEAKER 08 :
Why? She has whole rooms.
SPEAKER 12 :
What? She’s getting real snacks out?
SPEAKER 07 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 08 :
Real snacks. They’re dolls. They can’t get that. Oh my gosh, she’s manipulating.
SPEAKER 12 :
I hate mornings.
SPEAKER 08 :
What are we doing today? Putting together the storage racks and organizing all the hair accessories. This is nuts. What in the world? Now why she can’t wake up? Because it’s a doll. That’s why. No kid has that kind of hair. Those dolls have better hair than she does. She has a whole house outfitted with doll stuff. That’s sad. That is really sad. And highly realistic baby dolls. Apparently, Wall Street Journal has this piece. This is a growing trend, believe it or not. Now, I understand that there are some women, and I don’t want to hear the male email from it because not everything is about you, okay? Yes, some women experience loss and they have miscarriages and they get reborn dolls, which I think that you just, you know, you need some therapy. And some people have Alzheimer’s and dementia. Stop. That’s not what this lady has. Stop it. And I’m not going to make it. This is weird. No caveat. It’s weird. You have an entire room for a doll. That’s like thousands of dollars of stuff in there for a doll. And it’s sad. I don’t I don’t want to make fun of her. It’s creepy, and this actually would be an amazing horror film now that I think of it. That would be an amazing horror film. I’m already scared, dude. Look at me. I’m already like, ooh. This is already terrifying. But it’s sad.
SPEAKER 12 :
So I’m confused, though, about the whole trad wife thing. Like it being…
SPEAKER 08 :
know a target of feminism so is this going to be targeted by feminism because she’s just playing the the role of a trad wife uh well is she though because i mean she’s i think she’s staying home taking care of the babies well yeah but where’s the husband and where’s the lord you know that’s kind of part of the trad thing right i don’t know i but do you know how much these some of these dolls are so the wall street journal says these are like eight thousand dollar dolls
SPEAKER 12 :
Dude. You mean all together?
SPEAKER 08 :
No, like each doll can be like anywhere from $3,000 to $8,000. Get out of here. For real. Like they punch the hair in the head. Like they hand hair it or whatever. I don’t know what that phrasing is. But it’s sad to me, though. And they’re trying to fulfill something, trying to fill some kind of need. And it’s just sad. I mean, it makes me wonder, you know, I don’t know a lot about this lady. I don’t know if she’s got kids or know she you know what it is. But Wall Street Journal says it’s not just women who have miscarried or people who have Alzheimer’s. It’s not just that. That’s my point. It is grown beyond that. It is a lot more than just that now. So what is driving that? I did not know that this… Did you guys know this was a huge phenomenon? I didn’t know this. I did not. I did not. I was completely unaware of this. Now, Lorraine is freaking out. I can’t even say what… Are you redacting me? Is she using caps lock real baby formula? I think she is. I think she is. I… I can’t believe how expensive these things are. Now, when I was younger, I was a kid, One of a family member, they weren’t like lifelike baby dolls like this, and she didn’t play with them. They were like China dolls with the China doll face and like the weird, and she collected them and kept them in a cabinet. And whenever you would walk into the room, their lifeless, soulless, dead, demonic eyes would stare at you, follow you all around the room. I swear their faces glowed at night, but it could have been just me. That’s different. And like I said, the Wall Street Journal piece noted, and I saw this thing on Instagram too, what began as something to help Alzheimer’s patients, like women who thought their memories, they had regressed because of the disease back to being a new mom, and they didn’t know any better and you couldn’t get through to them, or women dealing with loss or whatever. It’s so far beyond that. That’s why it’s a booming business. It’s not just that. It is a booming business. It is a huge trend. That’s what the Wall Street Journal wrote about it because they were like, what in the world? This is like people are making tons of money like they you literally have like luxury lifelike doll dealers. And it’s not just collectors that just hold. I mean, they look like it’s just crazy. But it’s sad because why? What is happening in these women’s lives, especially when you think about the birth rate decline and the birth rate? I feel like they’re brooding. That’s what it is. They’re broody. I don’t know. There’s a New York Post had at this time last year. They had this story. Oh gosh, I hesitate sharing this with you. It’s so weird. They had this story where this one woman had eight of these dolls and she took them with her everywhere. She even bought like a specialized vehicle to load them in the vehicle. Craziness. Now coming up, I know, I don’t know how to segue out of that. It’s crazy.
SPEAKER 10 :
Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
SPEAKER 06 :
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Absurd Truth: Richard Gere’s Horrible Immigration Take
Join Dana Lash as she unpacks the bizarre and often hilarious world of Florida Man. From mistaken identities and public intoxication to incredible tales of absurdity, explore the stories that make headlines and leave us questioning reality. Listeners are treated to Dana’s sharp wit and unapologetic commentary as she evaluates the mindset behind some of Florida’s strangest encounters.
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