Join Dana as she navigates through the week’s quirkier side of current events. From the humorous yet cautionary tale of wild meat mishaps in Florida to the gripping drama on the Baldwins’ red carpet adventure, this episode is packed with insights and witty banter. As we wrap up, Dana remarks on economic shifts impacting businesses like Denny’s and explores the undercurrents of privacy concerns amidst Tesla’s recent data controversy. Don’t miss out on this entertaining and thought-provoking discussion.
Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. Sponsored by Kel-Tec.
SPEAKER 03 :
It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.
SPEAKER 02 :
Alright, so… This is so gross. Don’t eat like random… wild animal meat okay because it’s really nasty but yet people are still doing it i have to i have to share this story so this is a florida man who ate uh feral pig meat and then contracted a rare bio threat like bacteria oh what what i actually i’m fine with eating wild meat i mean i have family that would eat it off the side of the road i um I’ve had wild hog before. But I’m like, I think that you need to also, as part of you gathering food, you need to be aware of the health of your food before you harvest it. So this actually, like this plague, this guy for a long time, it was at a Gainesville hospital. He had chest pain and he lived on a rural farm and he had been in and out of the hospital and it was like a bacteria that was getting into his heart. And they thought he had a maybe it was a heart implant, you know, maybe a germs behind it. Well, they found out it was a wild hog infection. He had a bacteria. And apparently it’s something I can’t even I can’t even Bruce Sella something. But apparently it’s something that is in like prevalent and wild hogs found in pigs. And it’s very damaging to hogs. And it’s really not something like brain infections, things like that. You’ve got to be smart when you’re harvesting out of nature, right? But man, can you imagine being sick for like years? This guy going through this hospital, being sick for years. Oh, it’s because of the wild hog meat you ate two years ago. That’s crazy. Am I going to have time to get one more in? We’re like short on time every segment today. I apologize. I won’t shut up. But Florida Man has been cooking up iguana egg omelets because chicken eggs have been so expensive. We’ll talk more about that tomorrow. Third hour on the way. Our program in part is brought to you by our good friends over at Caltech. They make shooty sticks. Woo! Kel-Tec has a brand new firearm. It’s a PR-557. I got to say it right. It’s the, it’s an awesome 5.7. It’s actually the only 5.7 I can actually probably carry. PR-57 rotary barrel pistol chambered at 5.7. Redefining the game. It is 40% lighter than the next lightest 5.7 on the market. And that’s done in part two ways. Unique top-loading design replaces the traditional magazines with stripper clips. So all the leftists who are like clip instead of mag, you’re right. It is a clip. And that allows for a slimmer carry profile in a 20 plus 1 capacity. And it’s also… That rotary barrel, super, super ingenious. Engineered for simplicity and reliability. Kel-Tec is dedicated to making innovation and performance affordable. This thing has an MSRP of only $399, so you can get it. Visit Kel-TecWeapons.com to learn more. It is the Kel-Tec PR57 rotary barrel pistol chambered in 5.7. K-E-L-T-E-C-Weapons.com. Tell them Dana sent you. It’s just also cringe. Not as cringe as Alec Baldwin getting told off by his wife, though. Golly, I we need some time on this one. All right. So first off, this is it’s audio somebody 23. This was at they have a reality show. The Baldwins have a reality show that they’re doing. And Alec Baldwin, as you know, everybody knows what happened with Rust. I just think it’s in such bad taste for them to be doing this right now, but whatever. So his wife, Hillary, but she doesn’t call herself Hillary anymore. How does he say her name?
SPEAKER 04 :
Hilaria.
SPEAKER 02 :
That’s not even her name. She’s a white girl from Boston.
SPEAKER 04 :
Hilaria.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, her name’s Hillary, and she just decided, I guess, to change her name. But she was born and raised in Boston. And they were at the red carpet event. for their reality show i don’t even know what it’s called i don’t care so they were at this red carpet like a premiere event and they were both being interviewed by a reporter because it’s a reality show about them and their family he really deserves her really does watch this we want more of this season two
SPEAKER 05 :
The Ilaria show.
SPEAKER 06 :
No, no, I think we’re going to see, you know, we’re going to see how it feels to have it be out there.
SPEAKER 05 :
It’s going to be great. You’re a winner.
SPEAKER 06 :
Oh my God, when I’m talking, you’re not talking. No, when I’m talking, you’re not talking. This is why, yes, we’ll have to just cut him out of the show. No, I mean, I think this is a really raw show and it’s very real and we took a lot of chances.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, Cain. First off, she can speak English now.
SPEAKER 03 :
She’s great at it.
SPEAKER 02 :
She’s so fluent. She is. She’s really fluent with her English. Move over, Melania Trump. This Spanish girl is great at being American. Jiminy Christmas. Remember the show when she, if we can find, well, we probably can’t because it’s a Today show and NBC will probably give us a copyright violation. She was on the NBC show, some like Today show, and she was doing a cooking thing, and she had a thick Spanish accent. And she’s like, how you say cucumber? She’s like trying to, you just said it, you dumb bee. You just said cucumber. How you say cucumber? It was so ridiculous. So that’s exactly what she did. And we’re like, you were born in Boston. Like you grew up in America. Look, her parents vacationed in Spain a lot. And I guess she loved the Spanish culture so much she lied about being Spanish. I can’t, man. I can’t. That’s like when you go to the Caribbean and you get your hair braided, like you see little girls get their hair braided or whatever. It’s like you just don’t, you know, you don’t become a black Caribbean islander. You know, you just don’t go, you know what I’m saying? Like you don’t go, I’m not going to go to Mexico and be like, I’m Mexican now. It’s not how that works, right? Oh my gosh, you have it? I think Juan found that cucumber audio. God love you, Juan. Juan comes in clutch.
SPEAKER 06 :
It is one of… Very few ingredients. We have tomatoes. We have… How do you say it in English? Cucumber? Cucumbers.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, my gosh! What in the world? Oh, I am so dead. Oh, my gosh. I’m cringing to death. How you say cucumber? What’s the English for… What? You speak English?
SPEAKER 04 :
It’s just a pre-pickle.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, so anyway, they’re having their red carpet event and she just turns around and bites his head. Can we play this one more time? Was he trolling her in the beginning? It’s the hilarious show. It’s just all about her. That’s how I interpreted that.
SPEAKER 05 :
The Ilaria show.
SPEAKER 06 :
No, no, I think we’re going to see, you know, we’re going to see how it feels to have it be out there.
SPEAKER 05 :
It’s going to be great. You’re a winner.
SPEAKER 06 :
Oh my God, when I’m talking, you’re not talking. No, when I’m talking, you’re not talking. This is why, yes, we’ll have to just cut him out of the show. Now, I mean, I think this is a really… raw show and it’s very real and we took a lot of chances.
SPEAKER 02 :
I want to slap her. That’s so mean. He’s like pumping you up and she’s like, when I’m talking, you’re not talking. When I’m talking, you’re not talking. Oh my gosh, you wouldn’t even be here if I wasn’t talking. Girl, shut up. Oh my gosh. He deserves her. I think he met his match. He just found the female version of himself. Okay, so I was at An event in New York City. It’s the only event of its kind that I went to. I get really awkward. So, you know, obviously I sit behind the mic and I talk to you guys every day. And Cain can attest to this. It’s like a different beast when you’re out in meat space, right? And I do not do well at these like cocktail events. So I don’t go to them. I don’t do well because I just say whatever comes into my head and it’s so awkward for everybody. And I don’t know. I hate small talk. I don’t know how to do small talk. And so we were at this event in New York and I saw them and I was standing with, now don’t get weird about it, I was standing with Mark Thiessen and Don Lemon’s boyfriend. Yeah, it’s a weird thing. And I dared them, I was like, do you guys double dog dare me to go out to Baldwin? Like we were school kids. Like do you double dog dare me to go out to Alec Baldwin? And in fact, I think it was for our friend Megan’s, Megan Kelly, her book launch. And they’re like, oh my gosh, yes, do it. Yes, do it. Like Don Lemon wouldn’t even go up and talk to him. So I went up and I introduced myself and I told him I liked his body of work, particularly Royal Tenenbaums. She just stood there. All Family Pharmacy is a great place to go to get all the medications that you need.
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SPEAKER 01 :
Insufferably annoying.
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SPEAKER 02 :
This other part of me would literally probably like apparate outside of my body and slap myself. That’s just so… That’s not, it wasn’t funny. And did you see the little awkward moment at the end when she’s bringing her hands in? Like she knew it looked bad and she’s just trying to like find some equilibrium. She knew that it looked bad. Also, why are you dressed like a green screen? You know, four foot three dressed like a green screen, four foot three dressed like a green screen. Isn’t it the millennial thing to do? Anyway, I don’t I don’t get it. So it was and he just walks away. He just walks away after it walks away after it. I think he deserves her. He deserves her. Right. You can see on his face. I deserve this. Does she know my husband made this point? Does she know that he shoots women?
SPEAKER 04 :
So we better tell her.
SPEAKER 02 :
I know. Better tell the girl. Good night. I mean.
SPEAKER 03 :
I do wish them a lot of years of togetherness.
SPEAKER 02 :
You’re so nice. I know. Look how nice you are. I’m not saying anything about that. You’re so nice.
SPEAKER 03 :
I feel good about it.
SPEAKER 02 :
Look at you. Are you going to go home and lay your head on your nice soft pillow and go to sleep knowing that you’re such a good person? Yeah.
SPEAKER 03 :
You’re so full of it. My thoughts of their togetherness.
SPEAKER 02 :
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SPEAKER 03 :
And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.
SPEAKER 02 :
All right. So I got to put my. Yeah. Yeah. We it’s King’s birthday. So we’re just going crazy on break. We haven’t even started yet. So, you know, we’re just we’re just going crazy. All right. First up, we’ve got I want I wish it was all aliens. I wish it was all like amazing stuff from the JFK files, but it’s not. We do have a New Jersey mayor who got arrested for being drunk as a skunk on St. Patty’s Day with her toddler in a car. We do got that. They was accused of driving drunk with her toddler in the car on St. Patrick’s Day. The Lumberton mayor, Gina LaPlaca, admitted to drinking before she got behind the wheel to pick up her two-year-old son at daycare on Monday. And then a bystander took video. She’s a 45-year-old Democrat. Girl was swerving all over the road. She almost hit a utility pole. And they shared it with police. Then they located the vehicle in question at her house. And they found an open container of alcohol, a toddler strapped in the rear passenger seat. And she said she’s going to seek treatment for addition and get help. Is it addiction or is it just like you’re making bad choices and you want to say it’s addiction so you don’t have to actually take responsibility for it? I don’t know. Gold sets another record as a safe choice. DanaLikesGold.com. Get your gold from Gold Co. They set another record as a safe choice. Front Month Gold Futures have continued to set records. Investors maintaining a risk-off appetite ahead of the Fed’s meeting tomorrow. Today, really? Right? Today. No, it’s tomorrow. tomorrow yeah they make the decision today okay that’s right i thought okay i was like i thought that was wrong uh but they said that it’s up now for six consecutive seasons we’re gonna find out some big news this week i know are they i mean we they told us that inflation was imaginary so why are they having to do all this stuff i don’t know uh what’s up denny’s favorite fan restaurant closes after 26 years is the chain what Denny’s is closing everything? No! This was the restaurant of my youth. No! I would go. What?
SPEAKER 03 :
These in New York are being closed at least.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, well, because I mean, who doesn’t love a good moons over Miami, right? The industry is buckling under the weight of economic pressure. And obviously consumers are like, we’re going to we’re broke. We’re nervous. We don’t want to spend anymore. But they said that Syracuse, it’s a bunch of New York locations are closing. I feel like they’re winding down everything personally. I feel like it’s not it’s just not going to start here. I think it’s going to be everywhere. But Denny’s Denny’s and Waffle House are where it’s at.
SPEAKER 03 :
Really more emo rock shows.
SPEAKER 02 :
What was that?
SPEAKER 03 :
They need to do more emo rock.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, yeah. They need to have more mosh pits at Denny’s. Chips and cookies are getting too expensive. Shoppers are buying less. That’s a great health plan from… That was Biden’s maja. Biden just thought that they could make everything super unaffordable for you and then you would lose weight because you can’t afford to eat. That was how they were approaching it. So it’s the poor diet, right? I’m sure, especially if you’re a subscriber, you saw the story that I had yesterday evening. A website… that features an interactive map that lists all of the names and the addresses and the phone numbers and the social media details of every Tesla owner in America. And they’re demanding that if people want their information removed, that they proved to the people doing this website that they sold their Teslas before the people running this website take the Tesla owners’ sensitive information from said site. I didn’t link the site. Now, the cursor is a Molotov cocktail. What does that tell you, Cain? birthday boy.
SPEAKER 03 :
I guess the people that hated January 6th, they’re all about destruction of property for some reason?
SPEAKER 02 :
No. Remember, these people, the Tesla folks, the people who were very upset over big balls up a doge, those people, they told us they were very upset about potentially our private information being used. Remember, they were very upset about this. They said that Big Balls was going to get our social security number and just, you know, throw it all over the internet like cash money at a strip club. I don’t know. That’s what they were insinuating. So weird. They were so concerned about our social security numbers, the left came. So concerned. So, I haven’t seen them… talk about this. I would imagine, Kane, they’re super upset about this.
SPEAKER 03 :
I mean, that would make sense, but they don’t make sense.
SPEAKER 02 :
They list on their website. And it was called Doge Quest. So stupid. If you’re on the hunt for a Tesla, this is from their site. Quote, if you’re on the hunt for a Tesla to unleash your artistic flair with a spray can, just step outside. No map needed. At Doge Quest, we believe in empowering creative expressions of protest that you can execute from the comfort of your own home. I love executing protests, don’t you? I mean, like the act of it, right? They said, you know what? I think they think that they’re being super cute with their language, but they’re not. I mean, it’s dude, you’re still actionable. I mean, come on. But yeah, artistic flirt that you’re talking about vandalism. You’re talking about destruction of private property. I know that the left is has like a very like freaky only fans type fetish with destruction as speech, but it’s not. And then they list on here. I want my information removed. Absolutely. I hope that someone signed this email address up for everything. In fact, I’m shocked that I have not done it yet. sidebar when i get emails that i don’t want i will i sign those people up for everything and you literally will have to close your email account in order you will not be able to use it i will ruin your email account i will sign you up for every god the heaven thing on earth it’s not even not even not even a joke i swear to you i do this i am that petty so they have their email up here hmm so they said yeah just provide us with proof that you’ve sold your tesla I’m not saying to do any of this, but it’d be super funny because nobody’s anonymous on the internet. And it’d be just super funny. Yeah, here’s a picture of my Tesla in your driveway as I come knock on your door. I’m kidding. I wouldn’t. Or would I? No. But they said that, yeah, we only accept scan documents in JPEG and PMG formats. And that’s, I mean, that’s extortion. This is extortion. And this follows a string of now pretty frequently occurring incidents where leftists have keyed Teslas in parking lots. They shot up a dealership. they’ve set fire to dealerships. And the left, like I said, they really, really, really opposed Musk and the spending cuts that Doge had recommended. They were saying, again, Big Balls is going to go out there, get our social security numbers, sign us up for Publishers Clearinghouse. I don’t know what they thought was going to happen. I mean, these nerds only had, and there was only like a handful of them, they had read-only access under NDA of very specific things. But the left is hysterical. Heaven forbid you cut our spigots that go and fund ActBlue. Heaven forbid. So they falsely accusing Dodge of having all this access when they didn’t. But this was all theater. They didn’t really have any actual legitimate concern for people’s private information. I mean, if they’re willing to use violence and extortion to as retribution for the type of car someone chooses to buy. I mean, that was all fake. They never cared about it. They sure as hell didn’t care about your private information when it was being leaked out by the IRS. I mean, they sure as hell didn’t care about your information then. They sure as hell didn’t care about your information when they were going after parents who were speaking up at school board meetings and following them and breaking, I don’t know how many laws to classify them as domestic terrorists, you know, surreptitiously under the Patriot Act. So the left has been professionally agitating since…
SPEAKER 01 :
against uh musk since even before the election since even before the election thanks for tuning into today’s edition of dana lash’s absurd truth podcast if you haven’t already make sure to hit that subscribe button on apple podcast spotify or wherever you get your podcasts
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