SPEAKER 01 : 0:00

Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec.

SPEAKER 04 : 0:05

It’s his life mission to make bad decisions. It’s time for Florida Man.

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Man, I don’t even know what Florida Man was doing over Thanksgiving weekend, but apparently it was something else. So, first up… I’m going to do this one. The cockroach eating one. This is the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen. A Florida man kicked the bucket after choking on live cockroaches in a disgusting eating contest. So he consumed numerous live cockroaches and the grand prize is a python. He suffered fatal asphyxiation when he choked to death on one. Oh, my gosh. I cannot even read the story. I am dying right now. It was called the Midnight Madness marketing event at a reptile store. I can’t believe someone wanted a python. You can just go into the damn swamp and get it for free, you know. I mean, there’s that many. You don’t need to eat live bugs. There’s an entomology student who witnessed it. And oh, my gosh. And these things were three to four inches in length. Yeah. Uh-huh. I’m done with all of this. That’s so lame. If you’re a store and you’re doing that, that’s… We’re all… I’m sorry. A Florida farmer opened fire in a bar after an argument over how many eggs a hen lays. Yeah, we did that one.

SPEAKER 05 : 1:41

When? We did that one the week before Thanksgiving. I don’t think so.

SPEAKER 07 : 1:44

No, that was a different one. Was it? Did we do this one? I don’t think we did. You know, in our luck, it’s probably like an actual other Florida man. Okay, so let’s talk about then the guy who sprayed barbecue sauce everywhere. How about that one? I bet you don’t have that one, Kane. A Florida man was arrested because he broke into a home and sprayed barbecue sauce on all the walls and furniture before the house caught on fire. Jiminy Christmas. He has, yeah, Evan Hunter Hammock. I don’t like his name. 20, Gainesville. He was arrested because he broke into a house, sprayed barbecue sauce on all of the walls and furniture before the house caught on fire. Now, they did say that arson charges may be filed. So there’s a possibility that he also burned the house down in addition to spraying it with barbecue. It sounds like he was very confused as to how barbecues work. I feel like. And it happened about 6 in the morning. And they responded. They took him into custody. But they may still file that arson charge. Stick with us. We’ve got more in store. Caltech, the Peacekeepers Program, something that they’re doing. It supports people who protect themselves. you know, churches and our schools and law enforcement, all of that school resource officers, they are there are a lot of faith based teams and SROs that, you know, they rely on small, concealable pistols, you know, nine millimeters. Caltech has long guns that solve that issue, because those long guns can fold up compact for discrete carry and deployment in seconds with full rifle capability. They also get mission-ready support, the folks in the Peacekeepers program, like extra platform testing and armorer training. And they also get direct Peacekeeper pricing for budget-conscious organizations as well. Program’s already active. They’ve equipped over a dozen churches through the Faith-Based Security Network, every Brevard County school as well, some other schools. They use R-50 defenders, and you have some that use KSGs and sub-2Ks. But they’ve been partnering with the Faith-Based Security Network and giving people access to this training as well as the pricing and everything made right here in the U.S. of A. So if you’re interested in the new Peacekeepers program, use the contact form at caltechweapons.com slash Dana. It’s K-E-L-T-E-C weapons.com slash Dana. Tell them Dana sent you. Welcome back to the program. Top of this third hour. Chats at Rumble. Also, you can stream the radio program, Channel 347 Direct TV as well. And don’t forget the Substack, Chapter and Verse, and our podcast, Apple. Go subscribe. I have to share this story with you because it’s chef’s kiss satisfying. Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones. are very upset. They are reportedly furious over their sons on air humiliation on CNN. They are upset because their son Dylan, who does he host another Nepo baby with a podcast? Is that how I understand it? I don’t know what the hell this kid does. He’s a fetus. And he hosts a podcast or radio, whatever. Anyway, he was on CNN, a roundtable discussion, and he got into it with a couple of people, including Scott Jennings. And he it did not go very well for him at all. He like started stuttering in the middle of one of his answers. And sorry, he’s a clump of cells. Thank you, Kane. And he started just stumbling and muttering through one of his answers and it all fell apart. And his parents were livid. First, let me just share. This is what happened. This was cut. Sorry, I got to pull up my audio. I lost it. Yes, this is the flashback of 31. Thank you. Listen.

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You cannot put on the American people that Democrats were the one that were hurting people, making this plight. Who was casting the votes against opening the government, Democrats or Republicans? Who was casting the votes? Scott, who was wanting to cut SNAP benefits? Nobody. And who was playing up? He was paying up SNAP benefits after two courts ruled that it was unallowed.

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Republicans voted to fund SNAP 15 times. Democrats voted to defund it 15 times.

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And you talk about the Affordable Health Care Act. You talk about the Affordable Health Care Act. It’s terrible. Landmark legislation is not perfect. We understand that Democrats immediately had 70 percent of Americans.

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And then he and then even after this. So he immediately had a pivot and then he still got owned after that. So his parents, Michael Douglas, Catherine Zeta-Jones, were very reportedly displeased over the manner in which their son was humiliated. They they said apparently they they it’s been reported that they intend to blacklist the entire network and they think CNN crossed the line. By having him on in the first place, I agree. They informed one of those gossip columnist insiders apparently about the Douglas and Zeta-Jones’ reaction. They were said to be so furious that they want to blacklist the whole network. And Zeta-Jones apparently was ranting to her friends about how the interview was unfair and exploitative. What? And Douglas apparently said that the outlet crossed a line and they are angry because they knew he was not prepared for such a heated debate. One aid or one source said, quote, Dylan’s never been spoken to like that in his entire life. He’s always been the golden boy, adored, protected. CNN gave him a taste of the real world and his parents hated every second of it. I’m just going to say that politics may not be for you, baby. It may not be for you if you’re going to be that hurt by it. Oh, my gosh. And he just it really it’s not a lot of people, I think, expect to be coddled and. And that’s just not how it goes. It’s like how I see Nepo babies, Nepo babies, sometimes being on Fox. There are a number. Look, some of these people are my friends, but I don’t want to see your damn 19 year old kids sitting here lecturing all of us about tax policy. My gosh, they don’t even pay taxes. No offense, but I think you’ve got to have a little skin. Actually, I don’t care if you’re offended. Just like eat my shorts. I don’t care. I don’t care. This is not about being offended. And if people are offended over dissent, then you are literally too weak for this biz. Get out. But I’m I’m just I thought it was funny because I saw this from New York Post. Nikki Haley’s son, they said he has views to the far right of his mom. So apparently he’s like Groyper adjacent. But and he says apparently he apparently thinks he’s the voice of Gen Z. I’ve only met him briefly one time when she brought him to a TP USA event was having him taking him around me, introducing him to everyone, which I viewed as, oh, she’s trying to make that happen. I see there are conservative parents all the time that do this with their kids, and I don’t get it. I don’t get it. I don’t know. So the, and he’s been on, I’ve seen him go on cable news before. There was one show that I watched, they had a guest host and it was a string of Republican Nepo babies, one right after the other. There were like four Nepo baby guests. And I’m like, what in the world? You’re like, you know, live a little, be humble enough to realize you need to live a little before you start giving orders. That’s all we’re saying. Good night. And he had said, quote, one of his he told the New York Post, Democrats are listening to the younger people and it’s time for Republicans to do the same. Do you know every generation says this? Like you are not the first person to ever say this. You’re not the first generation. I get it that people think politics began the day that they graced the earth with their presence, Ken. But everybody says this. Every generation says this. And I say no. Sorry. I actually think it was the one thing that Kamala Harris said that was somewhat right. Sorry. I think the voting age is too damn low. It is. It’s too damn low. And he… I think it’s very easy to be to the right of Nikki Haley. So let’s not get apoplectic with the headline New York Post. It’s very easy to be to the right of her. And she seems like a nice enough person. I just disagree with her on a number of policy issues. But he was saying my friends graduated with great degrees from great schools and then nobody has a job. Oh, my gosh. I’m so tired of the victim mentality also. Look, I’m not saying that it’s not hard for this or any generation, but every generation has a hardness that they have to deal with. Imagine that you’re the greatest generation, right? You have World War I and World War II. Some were in both. And then you have the Korean War. And then your kids go off to Vietnam. I mean, it’s the Cold War and back to back. I mean, some people had it a little bit harder. The Great Depression. Golly, that’s why they call them the greatest generation, by the way. They lived through everything. All of this and more. We have got to stop entertaining this victim mentality. It’s not to say that there aren’t issues to deal with. Hell, yes, there are. I think that they’re fixable. I don’t think that there’s people in DC with the spine to do it. But I also think at the same time, the victim mentality has got to stop. Let’s I mean, I see people and the reason I point this out so much is because all of the things that I’m seeing from some of the NEPO babies is that they’re all complaining about the problems. Not a single one of them has a solution or wants to be a part of a solution. They just want to join the money train of bitching about it. OK, we’ve got a ton of that. What is your solution? And no, paying women to have babies, a.k.a. welfare, ain’t it? We do that to Phil. What’s your solution? I mean, there’s a lot of things we can do, but the victim mentality, come on, it’s got to stop. It’s just to, yes, we get it. Things blow. But also do you realize that some of the complaints of the younger generations are that, wow, how, why is it that I can’t live in the same house as this 70 year old, you know, marketing executive? I, I don’t get, I, I talked to a friend who, Well, an associate client, a contemporary whose daughter graduated two years ago and is a door dasher, does door dash and a couple of other things. Complaining and apparently turned down a couple of jobs because she just didn’t think that it was just enough for her degree.

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It.

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Entry level means entry level. Your degree does not mean low. And look, I’ve got a degree, which means I can do whatever I want. I want this corner office with the windows. I want to be able to have the top company parking spot. I want all these things. I mean, everybody starts somewhere. Everybody starts somewhere. I started waiting tables. Everybody starts somewhere. Even after college. Do you know what I did after college? I wrote, I edited people’s resumes. And then I started, I got my foot in the door freelancing, writing about people’s houses. And I didn’t know a damn thing about, I still don’t know anything about decor or anything like that. And then interviewing politicians and newsmakers. That’s how I got started. Got paid garbage with a degree. But you start somewhere. Everybody starts somewhere. That’s part of the problem is this unmanaged expectation. Some of that’s your parents fault. And also some of you people on the right need to stop pimping your damn kids out. I’m so tired of seeing it. Nobody wants to see everybody pimping their kids out on Fox News. I don’t want to see an endless string of NEPA babies. I don’t want to see people pimping their kids out as soon as they graduate college. They’re going to become a politician. Good night. We have enough welfare addicts. That’s what it is. You’re just adding to the welfare class. But they think it’s somehow more glorious and more respectable because you’re doing a job for the people, really. Come on. At least welfare recipients realize. And they call it what it is. The political class likes to think that there’s an art to it. It just cracks me up. Stop it. Stop it. Have your precious napa bebe go into the private sector and work in the real world. Do some hard work. Maybe get their hands dirty. It’s okay, mom and dad. It’s okay. Just good night. It made me think of that. So as we head into the holidays, it’s not just about gifts. It’s about gratitude and protecting what really matters, family and the future and your financial security. Colin Plume is the CEO at Noble Gold Investments. And I tell you, the market really opened my eyes as to how much can change in a year. I mean, think of it. The market changes fast. The economy changes. even your own job. So what’s the smart way to make sure that your money is actually working for you? While you’re sitting with family and thinking about all you’ve built, remember, Noble Gold Investments is here to guide you. Their team is helpful and informed, no hype, just honest advice. Gold is up 25%, the dollar is down 9%, and gold and silver have outlasted every crash and currency. It’s about long-term value and peace of mind, not chasing deals. And so that’s why you need to check out Noble Gold. Before you check out for the holidays, though, visit noblegoldinvestments.com slash Dana and download their free gold and silver guide. Open a qualified account and get 10 silver holiday coins. Visit noblegoldinvestments.com slash Dana. That’s noblegoldinvestments.com slash Dana.

SPEAKER 04 : 16:08

And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It’s time for Dana’s Quick Five.

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Okay, I thought free pet. I’m allergic to cats, legitimately. I actually am. A man was mauled to death by a lioness at a zoo because he was stupid and climbed into the enclosure in front of horrified visitors. You better not be putting that cat down. Better not. It was in Brazil. 19-year-old Gerson Machado slipped into the cat’s pen because he wants to become a trainer, and it mauled him. to death it ate him to death oh my gosh there’s of course there’s horror footage of course there is apparently he also has severe mental problems and he was diagnosed with schizophrenia etc uh and he there’s video of him literally climbing he scaled over the fence climbed the tree and then was mowed by the big cat so there there’s a reason why they’re kept in those giant pits by the way You’re not supposed to go with them like that. 6.0 magnitude earthquake struck northwest Anchorage, Alaska. Also, the boulder, the size of a small car, scratched into an SUV driving near Leavenworth. I always get nervous when I’m driving by anywhere that looks like Rockslide, especially like southern Missouri and out west Texas, like southwest Texas. Yeah, it was the size of a small car. Four people were, including a 12-year-old, there was no fatalities. There were minor injuries, but mostly everybody was unharmed, but They had to shut down part of the road while they could make sure it was safe. Francis far right leader was hit by an egg days after a flower attack. This from the National Rally Party. I mean, why would you do that with like eggs and stuff? That’s like, you know, bread and dessert making material. The suspect was a 74 year old man. Interesting. Also, pistachio. There is a pistachio plant. Recall. Well, this is Canada. I almost said Canadia. This is Canada. But the Canadian Food Inspection Agency, they said there’s possible salmonella. And they have like a long list of names, like anything that was sold in Canada. But then some of the stuff you can get like on Amazon and things like that. So you might want to just double check some of your information. Some of your labels for those things. And yeah, this was described as check your nuts. Anthrax Pigs of Texas, which sounds like an amazing metal band. Sparked Panic. What? You’re not supposed to eat. You can eat feral hogs, but they just taste different and gamey. I don’t like the taste. There’s an outbreak of feral hogs in Texas, though. They could be carrying anthrax infections, which I still think that that is probably one of the most amazing band names I’ve ever heard. Anthrax Pigs of Texas. You know, you could like incorporate the pig squeal in there as like an agitator. I’m just saying. But these hogs, they can cost over a billion in damages every year. That’s why hog hunting is so important. We also had this insane post on X. Insane only in the amount of… beans that the Minnesota Department of Human Service employees, I don’t know if you guys saw the actual, I know you heard the stories of it, but did you see the actual post from the official account, the Minnesota Department of Human Service employees? I don’t want to read the whole thing because it’s, this is almost like 800 words probably, Kane, 700, 800 word post. So This goes into the story that we talked about towards the end of last week with Minnesota and members of basically the Somali immigrant community. And apparently they how that we talked about the billions of dollars in fraud and how everybody in Minnesota was claiming that their kid had autism so they could get government money. So now the president has talked about this and I mean and correctly mentioned he was talking about Tim Walz and you’re the governor. How do you not see this? Well, dovetailing into that comes this Minnesota Department of Human Service employees tweet, and they immediately start off with saying, quote, Tim Walz is 100% responsible for massive fraud in Minnesota. We let we let him know. Key phrase here. We let Tim Walz know of fraud early on, hoping for a partnership in stopping fraud. But no, we got the opposite response. Walt’s systematically retaliated against whistleblowers using monitoring, threats, repression, and did his best to discredit fraud reports. They write, instead of partnership, we got the full weight of retaliation by Tim Walz, certain DFL members, and an indifferent mainstream media. They added scary and has left us wondering who we can turn to. And then they added that in addition to retaliating against the whistleblower, Tim Walz disempowered the office of the legislative auditor. So agencies didn’t have to. They could disregard their audit findings and guidance. And then they add in this post, media and politicians supporting Tim Walz or the DFL agenda attacked whistleblowers who were trying to raise flags, red flags on fraudulent activities. They say that it was a system, a cascade of systemic failures leading up to Tim Walz. Agency leaders he appointed, they wrote, willfully disregarded rules and laws to keep fraud reports quiet to the extent possible. of threatening families of whistleblowers. They add these same leaders are not qualified for their jobs, instead getting leadership jobs via Tim Walz’s friendship. So state government were left floundering Then they started naming media outlets, WCCO, NPR, they said showed zero interest in covering fraud happening in our own state. They said programs, especially in behavioral health and disability services, were built without any guardrails against fraud, all to extract more funding from the legislature and the federal government. This is I mean, they name names. They get in. They said that that waltz is dishonest, that he lacks integrity. He has poor leadership abilities. They said that he’s never taken any accountability for his role in fraud. He deflects by blaming national politics. I mean, their name and names and diving. This is insane. And then they cited Tim Walz or the New York Times’ piece on Tim Walz, quote, headline, how fraud swamped Minnesota’s social services system on Tim Walz’s watch. Okay, Cain, this is a government agency. What persuasion politically typically are these government agencies? Is that right, this?

SPEAKER 05 : 23:31

Without a doubt, they’re left.

SPEAKER 07 : 23:33

So are we to understand that a leftist… government agency was so mad at the fraud and abuse from Tim Walls that they posted this 700 word whistleblowing call out on X. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER 05 : 23:50

And I bet you they’re upset because they did this over a year ago when no one was listening as well. So, yeah, I’d be upset if I was them, too.

SPEAKER 07 : 23:57

Oh, my gosh. This is it is. That is something else. How I mean, if you’re Tim Walls, How does your staff deal with this? Now, can you guys imagine if Kamala Harris had won? He would already be installed as vice president. Here’s the other question I have. If this was over a year ago, why didn’t this come up on the campaign trail? Why didn’t this come up on the campaign trail? I mean, really, it’s been over a year. Why is our Republican oppo not doing their job? If this has been over a year, how has it not blown up until now? You’re telling me that we could have had a Tim Walz vice president and this would have blown up? Now think about H-1B visas. Think about all the stuff we’re dealing with, the Afghan stuff. You would have had a guy who’s been allowing this, merging it, allowing this to happen. CCP Tim.

SPEAKER 01 : 25:08

Thanks for tuning in to today’s edition of Dana Lash’s Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven’t already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

SPEAKER 03 : 25:24

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